Carolyn & Sonia In Focus

Have you ever had a bad day? Of course you have, we've all had a bad day. It would be like asking if you breath. The point being here is that we do have bad days, and we lash out to the people closes to us. Why is that? For me Sonia, Carolyn is the one person I spend almost 100% with so its inventible that she would  be there to witness to my bad day. It's not personal and this is a point I Sonia would like to drive home in this episode.

The other point is that if we are having a bad day the whole world doesn't have to have one with you! Did you hear me? Your bad day is not sharable unless the other person agrees to be misarable with you. Consent to be misable and if this will help the other person.

Carolyn and I have learned over the years to give each other space when we are not feeling out of sorts. I, Sonia have learned to look inward and basically do some deep self talk to figure my out of sorts feeling.  It's my own process that works the majority of the time.  Carolyn has learned not to take things personal when I get in a funk mood because it's not about her, its about me and my Funk.

The best advice we have for everyone, if you chose to accept it is to know yourself well enough to do one or two or three things: 

-Give yourself space and ask others to give you the same space you need to brew in your own funk. 

-Figure our a process that works for you. Ex: self-talk, distraction by going somewhere you enjoy, or spend time alone to think things through

-Acknowledge that you are having a bad day and let others know as well so they can chose to run far away until you are okay (LOL) 

-Don't take it out on those you Love. The day will end and you get to start all over again. 

I choose me first, even when you disagree. This is so true and it works! We have come a long way baby! 

In many of our conversations I'm first to say, Me First and not feel guilty in any way. Its self love and not selfish. Have you heard of this? Now is the time to really think about it. When we take care of ourselves everything and everyone will fall right in place.  

A good example of this is when we are about to take flight and the flight attendant says to the adults to dawn there oxygen mask first then the childs. This makes sense. You couldn't possibly be of any help to your child if you are struggling to breath.

It really is that simple. When we are fully charged and ready to go then we are very capable to help others if that's what needs to be done. Not only are we ready but now we are setting the standard for those who follow or are watching us. Do it for YOU first.

In our twenty years together, Carolyn and I have learned to respect ourselves and eachother for the needs we both require and/or demand in our lives together and as individuals.  A clear line makes situations and living together less complicated most of the time.  I say most of the time only because lets face it, we are humans and as humans we make mistakes all the time.

My point is to take care of yourself first because honestly, no one else will do a better job than you. Who knows you better? YOU 

Who knows what you want? YOU It comes down to taking responsibility for yourself and not being dependant on others to do what is your job in the first place.

When was the last time you did something new or learned something new?

Its a proven fact that when we learn new things our brain stays active, sharp and engaged. When we stop learning we are literally telling our brain that we don’t need it any longer.

Can you imagine being told that you are not longer needed?

I would be totally hurt and upset. So, don’t do that!

Think about it, our brain is the most complex part of our body and it starves for something new everyday.

Carolyn and I are life-long learners because we love to learn new things and apply them in our daily lives.

Why do we do this and why is it important?

As mentioned before our brain needs to be fed daily just as our body requires food and water. Without these necessities our body will simply give up on us.

Simply, we have been given the greatest gift in life; a brain to think, create and explore and a body to take us there and back.

As the saying goes:

Use it, or lose it!

Is it possible to stay in a ‘high vibe’ all the time?

In Sonia’s opinion, the answer is NO.

However, it is helpful to surround yourself in a positive environment as much as possible to stay in a ‘high vibe’

How do we do this? Good question.

In this episode we explore why Sonia has been in a ‘Funk’ for the past week and what steps are needed to get her vibe back up.

Usually, it takes figuring out why we are feeling all these emotions before we can address them specifically.

With that being said, the best thing to do is not beat yourself up and then give yourself time to look inward to peel off the layers to get to the core of the matter.

Sounds easy right? If you are willing to do the work the rewards can be beneficial to you and those around you.

Leave us a comment letting us know how you keep your vibe up.

EP 1: INFINITE CONVERSATIONS 

In this episode Carolyn and I talk about how we have changed since we started Podcasting in November 2021.

Our conversations have been more often and about everything

Sonia’s patience is much better!

We take risks by saying Yes more often

And so much more…

The main realization in this episode was when we stumbled across a BIG Ah-ha concerning our intimacy.

Yes, we are still struggling but WHY?

Listen in and find out what we discovered about our intimacy and maybe this will support you if you are having some of the same issues.

Most often than not, our excuses for not connecting goes deeper than what we think it is. The best way to address this issues is to really talk it out, and commit to work together to close the gap.

The best advice is to listen to your spouse’s needs and your own needs. More importantly, to act on those needs.

A personal note from Sonia: FOLLOW THROUGH!

Body Image is an ongoing concern for many of us. However, if we continue to talk about it, stay aware of it and deal with it face on, the less we tip-toe around the issue.

In summary, its been our experience to focus on self and to really tune out other people’s negative opinions.

As you develop this skill you will notice that you will spend less energy trying to conform. Start using this energy on you. It’s tiring to keep up with society, the media’s spin on what we should look or act like. Be yourself and honor that.

The rule of thumb here is to treat yourself, compliment yourself and love yourself as you would your best friend.

Now go rock whatever your wearing enjoy life.

“It takes being more mindful to make a choice to be kinder to yourself.”

If you think about, whatever we tell our brain to do, it will do it. Example: I like the color green. So, with that being said my brain will start looking for the color green and…it now likes green.

Now, let’s use this in a positive way. Tell your brain everything that you are, like and want to experience. Example: I’m powerful, I like photograghy, and I will travel the world! Your brain will start being powerful, buy a new camera, and look for places to travel to.

Where do we start? The best place to start is to leave behind what you were given without choice growing up that no longer serves you now, in this moment.

Think about it. Are you still doing what you were told to do as a child? As adults we now have the power, no permission needed to do what is good for us. Fear based upbringing for example. Do we have to stay in fear to live our lives now? No.

Honor You, honor what you want and need to live the way You want to live today.

Carolyn shares why she is giddy, joyful and singing for no reason. She is on fire (fuego) for her life!

What in your life fires you up? What steps do you need to take to explore that fire?

Share your fire with us…join our fb group or shoot us an email.

We are hosting a Virtual Cocktail Party Apr 4th 4 PM (CDT) We're in Texas Ya'll!

The link will be available in our FB Group; Hey Sonia and Carolyn. Also, go to our website, and or instagram for the announcement.

By the end of this episode you will say YES to joining our Virtual Cocktail Party…looking forward to meeting you if your body agrees. 

Our body knows when to say, Yes or No, but our brain isn’t in tune with our body. Why is that?

Well, our body doesn’t lie. We react naturally when it comes to protection. We lean forward when its good or we pull back when its not. Again, we are constantly re-assessing the situation right?

How would life be if we could trust our body to make decisions; we get out of our head. Because our brain is wired to know the what, when, and how.

It is a practice to listen to our body, to be more mindful and to trust what makes us happy.

However, it does get to be that easy. Saying Yes, even when you're unsure of how. It works. It keeps us curious and further exploring our life. We have ONE life, so lets make it a good one.

Start practicing by listening to your body and really tune in to what your brain is telling you in that moment. Are they in sync? Polar opposites? Or something else is going on.

Be mindful, tune in and trust yourself to be happy!

Carolyn gets to ask Sonia how is she being impacted by her ripple effect.

Carolyn: “Do you miss anything about me now that you don’t have to ‘worry’ about me?” Example being, when I had to constantly justify or feel that I had to earn my existence in our relationship.

Sonia: No. I love my new found freedom to explore ME now. I love that you have taken lead in your own life just by putting yourself first! Thank you.

So much freedom and peace in our relationship now that we have tackled negative Body Image.

Again, we are deserving of Everything we desire in life and that’s the God’s honest truth!

Take a listen to the conversation and share how Body Image is either keeping your relationship stuck or how it has knocked down walls that you never thought possible.

Be happy and live the life that best suites you.

 ’Woman In The Mirror’

What was Carolyn’s answer when I asked her:

What’s to be expected now that you have accepted yourself for who you are right now in this moment? What have you noticed?

Here’s a snippet of some of her answers:

- I started to slowly accept more and more of myself

-I’m dressing for ‘ME’

-I started accepting unexpectedly……

“Seeing myself in the mirror for the first time without judgements and it was quiet.”

This is a POWERFUL statement coming from Carolyn when you know her like I have for the past twenty years!!!

When we change our perspective for how we see ourselves, things will change for us.

-We start taking care of ourselves. Something as simple as putting lotion on our bodies.

-Drinking more water because our body deserves to stay hydrated

-We eat when our stomach drops hints throughout the day

-Use the restroom when our body tells us to

“When we love and think of ourselves first, everyone around us benefits from our positivity and confidence.”

Tune in to hear the many, many things that 'WE' have been able to benefit from by letting go of negative Body Image.

Also go to my instagram: Soniamarcos19666 and check out my beautiful peaceful wife; "Carolyn In The Mirror."