Reviewed: The Roses, Honey Don’t

I’m not gonna lie Jawheads, sometimes I struggle to write these. For as much as they can be diary entries that express thoughts and feelings at the forefront of my mind at times, finding a way to articulate what’s at the front of a mind gone mad is hard. 

So what happens is I end up writing and erasing and re-writing and re-erasing – as many times as I need to. And I continuously remake the show notes until I have something that I am actually willing to publish on the internet. 

Aaaaaaand isn’t that JUST like Hollywood!?!?!?

I mean, how many times have we seen A Star is Born? And yet the keep making them anyways. And are any of these remakes even on par with the originals they’re paying “respects” to??

Well, this is exactly what they boys try to figure out in the top 3 list this week with their Top 3 “On Par” remakes! These aren’t the ones that go above and beyond. These aren’t the ones that really under-deliver. These are the ones that absolutely nail it. That’s what we’re talking about this week baby!!

And we’re doing that because of one of the reviews we have this week. Matt and Ryan went out and caught The Roses, which for those uninitiated, is a remake of the Danny DeVito film from the 80s: War of the Roses. 

Plus, we’re getting an extra review in the from of of Honey Don’t. And we’re taking things home with a quick little round of “Rose” movie trivia. 

As always, take her easy. Love you guys to pieces, 

-KP

Reviewed: Nobody 2, Ne Zha 2

Is it morning already??? Sorry Jawheads. I’ve been over sleeping lately these days. I’m stressed out. My car got stolen. Then the new car I bought to replace it got rear-ended in a hit and run. And after that my house got broken into and my stuff got burglarized. I’ve been under a lot of pressure and I think I just need… A VACATION!!!!

That’s right baby – we’re talking about Vacation movies this week on CinemaJaw!! Yet again, I have lured your interests by opening with an overly-personal plea for sympathy that was actually about setting up for the episode description!!

To get in the spirit of vacation, Matt and Ryan picked out their top 5 favorite Vacation movies!! As well as, both our sweet boys from heaven have a review of the new Dad-Action flick Nobody 2 (that’s a new genre name I am trying to coin. This post is published and dated, so we know who said it first is all I”m saying). 

And, because none of us on this podcast team are capable of rest nor chill, we went one step even farther Jawheads. We made one more absolutely coo-coo bananas topic this week. We’ve got another review! Ryan got out and checked out the record-breaking Chinese Animated film, Ne Zha 2. 

This episode is the perfect time to relax, unwind, and silently seethe while you convince yourself time out of the office is going to solve the theft of your property, the destruction of your replacement property, and the anxiety of your home being susceptible to crime at any moment in time without you knowing or having control.

Love you all!!

-KP

Reviewed: Weapons, The Naked Gun, The Pickup

Strip down to your skivvies and prepare your weapons. That’s the only thing I could think of to start our Naked Gun episode. And it works, because we also cover Weapons in this episode! And for those at home who read the title of the episode – I don’t know how my juvenile innuendo relates to The Pickup!

But I know you guys. You love us anyways. Even though my crass and potentially cancel-able intros only tie into 66.67% of the films we review. 

Other than that, it’s a breezy little jaw this week! We’ve got some more of the usuals alongside those reviews. We play Liam Neeson and Pam Anderson Stump the Kubinski. We also got another week of Josh Brolin month to our names! What’s not to love?

You’re all Georgia Peaches and I love you.

-KP

Reviewed: Eddington, The Bad Guys 2, Together, Happy Gilmore 2

At the ripe age of 31, I realized the worst part of my aging process has been feeling tired. I just constantly feel like I have no energy. It’s the worst.

And, I know, a great amount of this has to do with my own life choices. I smoke like a chimney. My diet is horrible. And I perpetually over-extend myself beyond my limits with personal and career commitments as a means of distracting myself from my intense loneliness, social disconnection, and fear of abandonment. 

BUT – none of those choices are actually what make me tired. Not a chance. I’m not changing things within my control and you can’t make me. What the REAL PROBLEM is: is that THE MOVIES JUST KEEP COMING BABYYYYYY!!

That’s right, this was an elaborate and unnecessarily vulnerable setup for a REVIEW-O-RAMA!!!

We’ve got 4 big ones this week, and lemme tell ya, they cover a broad spectrum of genres! We start off with the new Ari Aster political western flick Eddington. Then we HARD pivot to Dreamworks’ follow up to one of their sleeper successes with The Bad Guys 2. After coming back from our break, like the glue that keeps this podcast together, we glom onto our review of the new Dave Franco and Alison Brie body horror film Together. And to close things off, we finish out with the legacy sequel nobody asked for and we were all kinda glad to get anyways: Happy. Gilmore. 2.

I’m not above spoiling this little tid bit – we’re positive on all of them. If you’re on the fence with any or unsure if you actually want to commit to the one you’ve been thinking about – listen to this episode! 

Love you all to pieces Jawheads!

-KP

Reviewed: Fantastic Four: First Steps

They say that bad news comes in threes – but what they *DON’T* tell ya, is that good things come in fours!!

That’s not true. I made that up. I’ve never heard somebody say that before in my life. What I have heard somebody say before is “The Fantastic Four are awesome.” Luckily for us, the whole CinemaJaw crew got the opportunity to see The Fantastic Four: First Steps and all three of of those jag bags came prepared with their reviews!

And if hearing 3 podcasters bickering like a dysfunctional family over a movie about 4 super heroes bickering like a dysfunctional family isn’t your jam, I hope you like 2 podcasters bickering like a dysfunctional family over the best movies in the MCU. As crazy as it sounds – we skipped Top 5 lists this week and instead decided to rank the ENTIRE MCU. Not just some. Not just the bests. THE ENTIRE THING. This is huge. 

FOUR those of us who that isn’t enough FOUR, Ryan made a special set of questions FOUR Matt this week in a riveting round of Stump the Kubinski. Matt has to answer up to trivia all about “4” movies.

It’s a good episode. I liked this one.

Love, 

-KP

Reviewed: I Know What You Did Last Summer (2025)

Last summer, I moved into a new apartment. I attended one of my friend’s weddings. My second niece was born. I started a job that I hated, I bought a new BMX bike, and I started taking estrogen. And that’s just about what I did last summer. And now… you all know what I did last summer. 

What you don’t know, dearest Jawhead, is that **I** know what **YOU** did last summer!!!…

…You listened to a lot of CinemaJaw! And who could have guessed then that a whole year later we would be talking about an I Know What You Did Last Summer reboot!? (I would have guessed we would all be millionaires and we would stop feeling like we have nothing to show for ourselves and we would have forgiven ourselves for every time we perceived we’ve failed ourselves and our loved ones and we would never feel existentially lost, alone and scared ever again… but there’s always next summer for that right?..)

And in honor of my life getting a reboot by next summer… I mean… in honor of the reboot of I Know What You Did Last Summer, Matt and Ryan listed their Top 5 Movie Reboots! Some might say the nostalgia market is bloating the market with unoriginal ideas and at CinemaJaw we say: “YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT!!” We’re going all in on the ideas we’ve seen 1,000 times!

And that’s not all! We also played some ICONIC Stump the Kubinski this week – Fishermen Movie Trivia. Yeah, it’s a weird one. But those are also the fun ones. 

We’re living large and in charge Jawheads. We’re gonna be talking about this one for years to come… or at least till next summer… for the bit.

Love,

-KP

Reviewed: Superman (2025), Jurassic World: Rebirth, The Old Guard 2

This week on CinemaJaw, we welcome ourselves back from the holiday with one big REVIEW-O-RAMA!!! It’s always a good week when we talk superheroes, dinosaurs, and gunslingers all at the same time!! In this week’s episode we’re reviewing two major summer blockbusters Superman and Jurassic World: Rebirth, as well as a couch blockbuster in the form of Netflix’s The Old Guard 2. Additionally, we have a fantastic guest joining us in the form of one Erika Valenciana! A local Chicago filmmaker and documentarian, Erika is joining us to talk about her love for film, her start in the industry, and her latest project Brewers – a documentary about the women behind brewing beer!

It’d be a bummer to miss this one y’all!

Erika’s Links:

Website:

https://www.erikavalenciana.com/

Kickstarter:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1239791466/brewer-a-short-poetic-documentary

Reviewed: M3GAN 2.0

LIGHTS! CAMERA!! ATLAS!!!

That’s not the slogan for Atlas Lighting – specializing in renting light and camera equipment for all sorts of film and media productions – but it **COULD** be. 

And I bring this C-tier (at best) pun into this write-up, not just because I’m foolish, but because it does actually tie into our guest this week – Stephen Wester! The owner and founder of Chicago’s very own Atlas Lighting!

Stephen’s tagging along with us as we go over the top 5 movie robots of the new millennium and as we discuss M3GAN 2.0. 

And don’t even get me started on “Light” movie trivia and this month’s brand new theme – Uma Thurman.

Love, 

-KP

Atlas Link:

https://www.atlaslightingchicago.com/ 

Reviewed: 28 Years Later, F1

This episode is being released on June 23rd 2025. And on the same day in 1997, Hanson’s Mmmbop just landed on the top of the UK’s billboard chart. And just like Hanson didn’t know what relationships and friendships would last forever, we never knew CinemaJaw would go on to record 706 episodes. Low and behold: here we are today… 28 Years Later.

( ?° ?? ?°)

That’s right baby we’re back with our 706th episode and we’re talking zombies this week. Matt and Ryan caught up with 28 Years Later and those two have THOUGHTS. We also have a review of the new Brad Pitt flick F1 – the reason we’re celebrating him this entire month! Fast Zombies. Fast Cars. Fast lifestyles. 

This one’s a goodie y’all. You’re gonna have a blast.

Love, 

-KP

Reviewed: How To Train Your Dragon, The Materialist

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Dragon.

Dragon who?

Dragon DEEZ NU- … ya’ know what… never mind. I’m not finishing this joke.

We all saw How to Train Your Dragon though so there’s that! While I’m obviously partial as a member of the podcast, I do think this particular review raises some fun conversation around these live-action remakes as Matt, Ryan, and KP all share their thoughts on Dreamworks’ first entry in the live-action remake ring. 

And hey, y’all already know – just like how society will put more and more funny words in front of the phrase “deez nuts” – CinemaJaw will always be bringing you more and more reviews. Ryan got out to see The Materialist, Dakota Johnson’s latest RomCom. 

Chris Evans Stump the Kubinski this week. And a big BIG fishtanks this week too. We got a lot of awesome feedback on the Prequel Vs. Spin-off debate… a war that to this day, has no true victor.

It’s a good episode this week guys. You’re going to have a cool fun nice cool time. 

Love, 

-KP

KP’s Links:

Pancakes and Booze: https://www.pancakesandbooze.com/chicago