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In my exploration of love dynamics in relationships with individuals exhibiting Cluster B personality traits, particularly covert narcissism, and borderline personality disorders, I draw from my own experiences. I’ve noticed how the term “love” is often used superficially, lacking genuine substance, and frequently manipulated as a tool for control. I’ve experienced the confusion and trauma bonds that can arise in the early phases of these relationships, especially through behaviors like love bombing.

I’ve come to understand that for these individuals, love serves primarily to enhance their self-image rather than to foster authentic connections. They often place conditions on their affection, expecting sacrifices from their partners in return. I reflect on the emotional turmoil I faced during phases of splitting and discard, where blame was shifted onto me while their positive traits were emphasized.

Additionally, I critique the tendency to excuse the negative behaviors of those with these traits by attributing their actions to past traumas. Ultimately, I’ve realized that love in these contexts is insincere and easily replaceable, with genuine reciprocation being absent. I’ve learned that actions speak louder than words when understanding true expressions of love, and I’ve witnessed the prevalent emotional dysfunction in such relationships.

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