By Natalie Elliott Handy and JJ Elliott Hill
The Confessions of a Reluctant Caregiver podcast offers a candid, unfiltered space to confess the good, the bad, and the ugly of being a caregiver through storytelling, guest interviews, and inform
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The podcast currently has 173 episodes available.
Established in 1987 by former First Lady Rosalynn Carter, the Rosalynn Carter Institute promotes the health, strength, and resilience of caregivers at every stage of their journey. As Mandy Barr, a caregiver coach and engagement specialist at the Institute, eloquently explained, the organization is dedicated to supporting caregivers from all backgrounds—whether they are military, veteran, or civilian families.
One of the standout aspects of the Rosalynn Carter Institute's approach is its focus on addressing the complexities and nuances of caregiving. Through research-backed programs and resources, the Institute aims to provide tailored support that meets each caregiver's unique needs.
The Institute offers valuable tools, such as the preparedness guide, which helps caregivers, especially those in military families, prepare for emergencies and disasters. By training first responders on these resources, the Rosalynn Carter Institute ensures that caregivers and their loved ones receive the support they need during challenging times.
About Mandy:
Mandy was born and raised in Plains, GA and earned her Bachelor of Arts in Dramatic Arts with a minor in English in 2004 from Georgia Southwestern State University. Throughout her career, she has served as a Secondary English teacher, Executive Director of Americus Literacy Action, Inc. an ESOL instructor and Academic Success Counselor, acquiring extensive mental and behavioral mental health training while working with at-risk individuals. She now serves as a Caregiver Coach and Engagement Specialist at the Rosalynn Carter Institute for Caregivers.
Living in Americus, she enjoys various outdoor adventures with her husband who is a veteran and three children, daughters Riley and Emily, and son, Cuyler, who has an ultra-rare brain disorder called Allan-Herndon Dudley Syndrome. Being a caregiver to a medically complex child, Mandy hopes to provide resources and support to other caregivers needing advocacy and support.
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As a senior Navy Chaplain, Bob Evan's calling has always been to serve and care for others, whether it was his troops, fellow service members, or the wounded warriors he encountered. When his fiancée, Gretchen, was severely injured by a mortar round in Afghanistan, Bob's role shifted from chaplain to devoted caregiver.
Despite his extensive training and experience as a pastoral counselor, Bob candidly admits that he struggled at times to provide the proper support and care for Gretchen as she navigated life-changing injuries, including deafness. However, Bob's unwavering love and commitment to Gretchen never wavered. He made it clear that he would accompany her on this new journey, no matter the challenges. Bob's journey as a caregiver is one of resilience, compassion, and a deep understanding that true caregiving requires listening, learning, and loving the person you are caring for.
As Bob shares his insights and lessons learned, it's clear that his role as a caregiver has profoundly impacted his own spiritual and personal growth. He has become an advocate for greater support and resources for military caregivers, recognizing the vital importance of self-care and finding respite to be an effective, loving caregiver.
About Bob:
Bob Evans, a graduate of Bowdoin College (A.B. - 1976), Princeton Theological Seminary (M.Div. - 1979), Candler School of Theology (Th.M. - 1992), and the Naval War College (M.A. - 2003), served over 25 years in the United States Navy. He retired as a Captain in 2008 after entering the Navy by direct commission in December 1982.
During his tenure, he served as a Senior Leader for the U.S. Fleet Forces, U.S. Atlantic Fleet, Joint Forces Command, Combined Forces Command-Afghanistan, and Naval Forces Europe, Africa, and Southwest Asia. He received the Bronze Star for his service in Afghanistan.
Bob began his career with the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) in May 2011 as Chief of Chaplain Services at Aleda E. Lutz VA Medical Center in Saginaw, MI. He joined the Atlanta VA in January 2013 as Chief of Chaplain Services and later also served as Acting Assistant Director. In February 2014, he was appointed Assistant Director of the Atlanta VA Health Care System. He then served as Interim Associate Director/Chief Operating Officer of the Dorn VA Health Care System in Columbia, SC, for six months before being selected as Associate Director/Chief Operating Officer for the Western North Carolina VA Health Care System in Asheville, NC. He held this role from January 2017 until his retirement from Federal Service in December 2019.
Now retired, he is a devoted caregiver to his wife, who lost her hearing in combat, and a strong advocate for veterans, their families, and all who serve the common good. He actively listens to others, helps them discover their passions, and supports them in turning their dreams into purposeful lives.
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This week, our episode highlights the vital work of PsychArmor, an organization dedicated to transforming how society engages with veterans and service members. Led by Dr. Tina Atherall, PsychArmor's mission is to provide education, training, and resources to both the military community and the individuals and organizations that support them.
We talk about the growing need for caregiver support, with recent studies showing a significant increase in active-duty, veteran, and civilian caregivers. Tina emphasizes PsychArmor's unique approach of serving two key audiences - the military and veteran families and the broader community interacting with them. Through online courses, webinars, and certifications, PsychArmor equips individuals and organizations to effectively support the military community, focusing on cultural humility and understanding the specific needs of this population.
A particularly poignant aspect of the conversation is the exploration of social isolation and its connection to suicide prevention within the military caregiver community. Tina shares her personal experiences and passion for this work, stemming from her own family's military connections. The episode underscores the importance of creating community, providing resources, and empowering caregivers to ensure they can be the best support system for their loved ones who have served.
About:
Dr. Tina Atherall is a social innovation strategist with a focus on nonprofit and education leadership. As CEO of PsychArmor, she leads a national nonprofit dedicated to educating and advocating for critical support for Veterans, service members, and their families.
With a Doctor of Social Work (DSW) from the University of Southern California, Dr. Atherall has devoted her career to social work leadership. Her recent work emphasizes addressing social isolation, one of the 13 Grand Challenges for Social Work. She is a George W. Bush Institute Stand-To Veteran Leadership Scholar and is active on the SAMHSA National Advisory Council and the Council on Social Work Education’s Military Social Work Specialized Practice review committee.
In addition to her leadership roles, Dr. Atherall holds advanced certifications in nonprofit leadership and military social work and is a Certified Daring WayTM Facilitator. She is an Associate Adjunct Professor at Columbia University and teaches in the Doctor of Social Work programs at Simmons University and the University of Kentucky. Her board service includes leadership positions at Mission Edge and Project Healing Waters.
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Qwynn Galloway-Salazar is the heart and soul of this week’s Heroes Caring for Heroes episode. As an Army veteran, end-of-life doula, and the founder of In Their Honor, Qwynn has dedicated over two decades to elevating the quality of life for military, veteran, and caregiving communities. Her personal journey, however, took an unexpected turn when her husband, Jose, a retired combat veteran and law enforcement officer, faced a major medical emergency.
Qwynn found herself thrust into a new role - that of a caregiver. Despite her extensive experience and expertise, Qwynn struggled to reconcile her professional identity with the deeply personal and emotional experience of caring for her own loved one. Her vulnerability and honesty in sharing this journey are both inspiring and heartbreaking as she navigates the challenges of maintaining her own well-being while supporting her husband through his recovery. Qwynn's story serves as a poignant reminder that even the most seasoned caregivers can find themselves in need of support and community.
Throughout our conversation, Qwynn's resilience, compassion, and unwavering commitment to her family and her mission shine through. Her willingness to open up about the isolation and loneliness of caregiving, the importance of self-care, and accepting help from others offers a powerful message. Qwynn's journey is a testament to the strength and resilience of military and veteran caregivers, and her story will resonate with and inspire others who find themselves in similar circumstances.
About Qwynn:
Dr. Qwynn Galloway-Salazar, known as Doc Q, is the Founder and CEO of In Their Honor. An Army Veteran and spouse to a Combat Veteran, she has devoted over two decades to enhancing the quality of life for military and Veteran communities. As an End-of-Life Doula Educator and Storyteller, Qwynn launched In Their Honor to collaborate with various stakeholders, ensuring Veterans and their families receive the care and support they need through the end of life. Her previous role as Co-Director of SAMHSA’s Service Members, Veterans, and Their Families Technical Assistance Center underscores her deep commitment to this cause.
Qwynn's influence extends across numerous initiatives focused on women Veterans, LGBTQIA+ Veterans, and end-of-life support. Notable roles include Lead Advisor for PsychArmor’s “Caring for Veterans Through the End-of-Life Collection” and her ongoing contributions as a Creative Advisor. She is also involved with the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization's End-of-Life Doula Council and the Compassionate Communities Think Tank. Her research and advocacy have earned her recognition as one of USA Today’s 2024 Women of the Year and the inaugural Woman Veteran of the Year by Georgia's Department of Veterans Services, highlighting her leadership and dedication to making a significant impact.
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This week’s special educational episode shines a spotlight on the incredible work being done by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) to support caregivers, families, and survivors of veterans. In this educational episode, Maureen Elias, a Senior Advisor to the Under Secretary for Benefits at the VA, provides a comprehensive overview of the vast array of benefits and programs available through the Veterans Benefits Administration.
Elias expertly navigates the three key buckets of VA support - caregiver benefits, family benefits, and survivor services. From healthcare and respite care to legal assistance and bereavement support, the VA ensures caregivers have the resources they need to avoid burnout and continue providing exceptional care. Equally impressive are the VA's efforts to adapt homes and vehicles and offer educational benefits for family members and robust survivor benefits, including burial assistance, life insurance, and dependency compensation. Listeners are left with a renewed appreciation for the VA's commitment to honoring the service and sacrifice of veterans and their loved ones.
About Maureen:
Maureen Elias serves as the Senior Advisor to the Under Secretary for Benefits on the development, adoption, and implementation of Department-wide programs and policies related to Benefits. In this role she analyzes and evaluates the effectiveness of these programs and policies and presents balanced recommendations for improvements. She represents the Under Secretary for Benefits in dealings with the senior staff of Cabinet officers regarding Departmental programs, initiatives, and policies.
Ms. Elias is a U.S. Army veteran and a U.S. Army retiree spouse. Prior to coming to the VA, Ms. Elias served on the House Veterans Affairs Committee and at two of the “Big Six” VSOs including Paralyzed Veterans of America and Vietnam Veterans of America. She has been recognized as one of the We Are the Mighty “Mighty 25”, 2021 VA Women Veteran Trailblazer, and as a HillVets100. She has appeared on various podcasts, testified before Congress, and written articles for various media outlets. Ms. Elias also volunteers as a storytelling instructor, helping Veterans, servicemembers, their families, survivors and caregivers learn to share their stories in ways that are meaningful.
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Angelena Taylor's caregiving journey began quite unexpectedly at the age of 28 when her father, Benjamin, experienced a stroke. This event marked the start of her role as a caregiver, which she took on with dedication and focus. As a daughter and military caregiver, Angelena balanced her responsibilities with her Miss USA World Universal Ambassador title, using each role to support the other.
Early on, Angelena faced skepticism from medical professionals who doubted her capability. However, she quickly proved them wrong by advocating strongly for her father's care, ensuring he received the treatment she believed was best. Her father's recovery became a central part of her life, and Angelena managed the ups and downs with determination. She navigated through the medical system, learning and adapting along the way to ensure that her father received the best possible care.
Angelena didn't set aside her dreams and goals even with her caregiving duties. She pursued her aspirations in pageantry, seeing it as an opportunity to raise awareness about the challenges and needs of military caregivers. Her role as Miss USA World Universal Ambassador allowed her to speak out on these issues, bringing them to a broader audience and creating a platform for others in similar positions to feel seen and heard.
Angelena's commitment to her father and advocacy work reminds her of the strength and dedication required in caregiving roles. Her journey is not just about overcoming obstacles but also about finding balance and purpose. Her story encourages others who are navigating similar paths, showing that it's possible to manage caregiving duties while pursuing personal goals with determination and support.
About Angelena:
Angelena Taylor is a proud daughter, military caregiver, cat mom, world traveler, and reigning Ms. USA World Universal Ambassador. A native of Detroit, Michigan, Angelena works part-time as a behavior analyst. Still, her most prominent and favorite role to date has been as a caregiver for over 8 years to her father, Benjamin, who is a stroke survivor and veteran. Becoming a caregiver at the age of 28 without much assistance or support birthed Angelena's passion for advocating for her fellow caregivers and restructuring the care infrastructure. She has been heavily involved as a fellow with organizations such as Caring Across Generations and The Elizabeth Dole Foundation, where she has connected with hundreds of other caregivers, collaborated with elected officials, and more. Featured in The New York Times and on The Tamron Hall Show, Angelena’s story is one of 53 million caregivers (and an estimated 5.5 million military caregivers) in the USA with the special redemption song of winning the prestigious title of Ms. USA Ambassador 2023. Angelena created Crown the Caregiver as a platform of awareness and advocacy in the caregiving community and plans to launch services as a Certified Caregiving Specialist in the near future
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Lori Rogers shares her powerful journey as the caregiver of her 33-year-old son, Craig, who was diagnosed with autism at 2.5 years old. When Craig was first diagnosed in 1993, Lori and her husband Neil dove headfirst into supporting him, trying various therapies, diets, and interventions to help him. Despite the challenges, they refused to live in victimhood and instead focused on hope and finding ways to help Craig and their family.
Lori also founded a nonprofit called Parents Assisting Special Educators (PACE) to support their community's special education programs and teachers. PACE lasted 18 years and allowed Lori and her family to give back and be part of the team supporting Craig and other children with special needs. Recently, Lori and her family discovered a life-changing communication method called "spelling to communicate" that has allowed Craig, who is nonverbal, to express his thoughts, knowledge, and desires for the first time at age 33. This has been a game-changer, as Craig now has a voice and is even starting his own Instagram account to share his experiences.
Throughout her caregiving journey, Lori has learned the importance of self-care, positive thinking, and maintaining a high vibration. She shared practical daily habits like giving herself a high five, journaling, meditation, and prayer that have helped her build resilience and see the beauty in her son's challenges. Lori's story is an inspiring testament to the power of hope, perseverance, and shifting one's perspective, even in the face of immense difficulty.
About Lori:
Lori is the caregiver of her adult son, diagnosed with autism. She is the co-founder of PASE—Parents Assisting Special Educators— a vehicle that provides vital equipment & supplies to support special needs classrooms & teachers. She founded Life-Op, which creates safe and productive learning spaces for special needs adults. In 2011, Lori began implementing the practices of Positive Activity and experienced a shift in her approach to caregiving. She helps audiences do the same, implementing simple
daily activities and mindset shifts that attract a life-changing experience. She is a Spelling 2 Communicate advocate.
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Susie Singer Carter shares the story of caring for her mother, Norma, who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 16 years before her passing. Susie describes how she was the first to notice the signs of Alzheimer's, even as her family dismissed her concerns.
As Susie navigates her mother's declining health, she also faces personal challenges, including going through a divorce. Susie brought her mother to live with her, which impacted her teenage daughter. However, Susie was determined to provide the best care for her mother, even as she struggled to balance her career and caregiving responsibilities.
Susie's story highlights the complexities of caregiving, from managing family dynamics to advocating for her mother's wellbeing. Despite the difficulties, Susie finds purpose in sharing her experiences and becoming an elder care advocate. She uses her creative talents to produce films that shed light on the realities of Alzheimer's and the nursing home system, hoping to inspire change and support for other caregivers.
About Susie:
Susie Singer Carter is a dedicated mother, filmmaker, and Alzheimer's advocate. She approaches filmmaking with the same purpose and care as raising her daughters, instilling values of confidence, curiosity, compassion, empathy, patience, grace, hope, and love. Her mission as a filmmaker goes beyond storytelling; she strives to dismantle ageism and ableism by crafting narratives that challenge stereotypes and celebrate diversity.
Her work highlights the richness of human experience, portraying characters who defy expectations and are empowered by their unique stories. In the feature film BRATZ, she created the character Dylan, a teenager with a disability who becomes a successful DJ despite being deaf. Her Oscar-qualified film, My Mom and The Girl, features Valerie Harper in her final performance, portraying Susie's mother who lived with Alzheimer's for 16 years.
Susie collaborates with actors, writers, and crew members who share her commitment to inclusivity and authenticity, creating films that resonate deeply with audiences and inspire change. She envisions a world where age and ability are celebrated, and everyone's story is valued.
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Confessions of a Reluctant Caregiver
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Website: www.confessionsofareluctantcaregiver.com
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Support the show
Confessions of a Reluctant Caregiver
Sisterhood of Care, LLC
Website: www.confessionsofareluctantcaregiver.com
Like us on Facebook!
Tweet with us on Twitter!
Follow us on Instagram!
Watch us on Youtube!
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Tune in on Whole Care Network
The podcast currently has 173 episodes available.
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