CPNP Podcasts | Crazy Pants No Pants

Winnie Cooper sounds like Mini Cooper. And Harrison Ford belongs in a museum. This is the worst show I've ever been a part of.

Cheese is a weird thing if you really think about it. Just think about it. Pretend I have never heard of cheese before. Now, explain it to me. Tough, isn't it?

Let's talk about Mormons. Quickly, before they get here. And, I got a bone to pick with our world. What's going to happen when the martians decide to take over? If we don't wise up and join as one, we're going to get stuck watching the paint dry. You smell me, dingleberry?

I've got a lot to say and a very limited time to say it. Here goes, I want you to want me. And I'm not just talking to Katie Holmes anymore. She's off my radar. I got a new get. So get with it. Got it? Get the word out, Carlos.

Imagine Al Pacino screaming this line: "You think I'm afraid of you???? Just cause you a life guard?????????

I haven't had a bowel movement in three days... and boy are my arms tired. Tune in tonight. We will cover everything from Citizen Kane to the International boycott of (fill in later). I have a PhD in ass kicking your face. I'm Mike Foolery.