"Don't leave your hockey equipment in the car over night...that smell STICKS to your car"

"But is it a dry stink?"

"One of us is going deaf, one of us is going blind...Cruz Mornings, we're edgy"

"Let's just tear out all of Circle Drive North and start over"

The lazy neighbour who takes the spot in front of your house... the person who leaves their cart in the middle of the grocery store...

We couldn't wait until Festivus to air these grievances. #CruzMornings

"All is right with the world...the Dairy Queen on 8th Street is open. Spring has officially SPRUNG"

"I miss 24 Hour Grocery stores...I really wish I could do my shopping at 3am"

"Don't frame and hang the Duece Bigalow Male Gigalow movie poster in your living room"

"How are people still getting Seatbelt tickets??"

"A nice Old Testament reference on Cruz Mornings"

"Tom Hanks needs to be put in his place"

We're not allowed to drink on the job. But if we could, this is what it would sound like!

On today's episode, we argue about raisins. #CruzMornings

"Raisins have only a three places...In Cinnamon Buns, in Butter Tarts and obviously 2 scoops in Raisin Bran"

Clayton has a Peacoat, but has been calling it a "Petticoat" since he got it...which is that poofy thing worn under skirts back in the day. HA.

"Ahh, Mr. Dad, making Gooood Cookies"

"A majestic painting of Zellers...is there even such a thing? - Yes. Apparently there is"

"Some people have Spidey senses...I have Dad Joke Senses"

After parting her hair differently...Stacie: "This is a game changer for my FACE"