Dave Smith of www.davesmithdharma.com reminds us that death is not rocket science. We know everyone dies. And when we are confronted with death, it is painful. Our challenge lies in knowing about death, but not understanding how to deal with it. And so we treat it as something that needs to be fixed. We can just move on if we can just fix it. "It" is our own sadness or the sadness of someone close to us. There is nothing to fix!

Let's give people permission to grieve. Allowing them to be sad on their own schedule. Without shame or shunning. Just be with your friend or family member who is sad. Just be with your own sadness.

Sometimes we need to allow people to suffer. Not, because you are cruel or unhelpful, but because you really understand the First Noble Truth, there is suffering. Buddhism is not about skipping over the suffering, it is about learning to recognize it, and the source of it and to accept joy and sadness together. Live a happy life, despite the suffering.