Wednesday on the Celebrity Birthday Scam, Maggie sells SECURITY CAMERAS so she’s dealt with her fair share of QUESTIONABLE characters, but TODAY might take the CAKE! The always INAPPROPRIATE Borat calls Maggie for some help setting up a camera…in the WOMAN’S RESTROOM!   

Will this call be a GREAT SUCCESS?!

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Fiona got her PATIO drains SNAKED, but the lawn-crew left behind a MASSIVE MUDDY MESS! Well, MUD MASTER Rog calls Fiona to say that lawn-care is a MESSY business, and that she should count herself LUCKY that it isn’t even WORSE!          

Does Rog CALM or TROUBLE these MUDDY waters?!

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Patrick got a bit too DRUNK in VEGAS and ended up PASSED OUT on a STRANGER’S COUCH in the WRONG HOTEL! Well, Rog, the RENEGADE loss prevention SPECIALISTS, calls Patrick to say he’s gonna PAY for a replacement COUCH, because he PEED all over THIERS on his DRUNKEN BENDER!      

Will Rog have to send the BOYS to COLLECT what Patrick OWES?! 

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Tara rented a PADDLEBOAT so she could get MARRIED on Lake Conroe! Well, Dean, the SHIFTY ship rental guy, calls Tara to say her BOAT’S DOUBLE-BOOKED! But no need to worry, they’ve got plenty of JET SKIS to go around for the WEDDING PARTY!   

Are Tara’s romantic wedding dreams SUNK?!

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Luke ordered a PINEAPPLE PIZZA online, got the pizza, but NO pineapple and he’s NOT HAPPY! Well, Dean, the pizza PURIST, calls Luke to say he didn’t get the pineapple because, what kind of MONSTER ruins a perfectly good PIZZA! It’s against the PIZZA CODE Dean’s hands are tied! 

How weirdly PERSONAL does this call about missing PINEAPPLE get?! 

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Steve owns a COFFEE SHOP, so he knows how to deal with JITTERY CUSTOMERS, but nothing like this! TODAY, Billy Bob Thorntons’s SLING BLADE calls Steve’s coffee place…But he don’t like COFFEE, it makes him a MIGHT NERVOUS!  

Will the CUSTOMER be RIGHT this TIME?! 

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James’ BOAT is under WARRANTY, which is good because the ENGINE is BUSTED! Now, trusted customer service EXPERTS Dean & Rog call James to let him know that the fix is DONE, but HE’S on the HOOK for the BILL!    

Will James’ calm BOATING WEEKENDS be sleeping with the FISHES after this call?! 

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One of Luke’s TREES got BLOWN DOWN by a storm, so he decided to REPLACE it! Well, Dean, the HOTHEAD HOA Rep, calls Luke to say the TREE he put in ISN’T one from the PRE-APPROVED LIST and either IT’S coming down NOW or Dean’s coming OVER to TAKE Luke DOWN! 

How does Dean make Luke’s TREE TROUBLE that much more TERRIBLE?!?

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Christine works at a RESTAURANT, so she knows how to deal with RUDE WEIRDOS, but what about POLITE ones? TODAY, the always neighborly MR. ROGERS calls Christine to talk about bathroom DOS and DON’TS…And maybe a DATE too!  

How FRIENDLY does MR. ROGERS get on this CALL?!? 

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Harrison had the WORST customer service EVER at the PHARMACY recently…Or so he THOUGHT! Because Dean, the PSYCHO pharmacist, calls Harrison to give him a taste of what BAD service REALLY looks like!    

How does the professionally UNPROFESSINAL Dean REALLY get under Harrison’s SKIN?! 

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