ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

September 11th FM Radio

Remembering The Twin-Towers Of Mattress Sale

Battery Charging Your Testicles

The Homeless Learn What It Is To Work For A Living

The Feminist Monopoly Game Has Everyone Pissed

Vaginal Juice Transplants

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Smell Mommy’s Boiled Clam Strips

Newest Internet Rage: Slathering Toothpaste On Your Penis

Weatherman Frankie Talks About His Hurricane Dorian Predictions

Customizing Sex Dolls To Look Like Your Best Friends Wife

Wacking A Guy With a Bowling Ball

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

Get 10 Free Gifts including 6 movies, free shipping, and more! Use coupon code FREAK at checkout @ AdamAndEve.Com!

Welcome To Distorted View’s Crude Summer!

Each week we will take a dip into DV’s pool of disgusting, poorly written, and just weird erotic fan fiction/ sex stories that have been featured over the past 15 years of the podcast. I originally read these stories to you during a segment called Sextastic Tuesday, which aired just about every week (on Tuesday’s, naturally) and creeped out a generation of freaks. Every weekend this summer we will relive some of these abominations.

This week: Toasters gone wild! 9/11 Erotica. It’s going to be a wild ride this weekend, freaks. BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

Hastily AI’ed Transcription Of Today’s Show:

Erotica has been getting more and more absurd over the years good stories like my velociraptor oncologist fuck the cancer out of me and my butt hole Stargate warped my boyfriend’s penis to the Delta Quadrant. So today’s screwed summer features a equally dumb premise. Oh hornik toaster is going to get laid. And then if we have time, and I’m going to do everything I can to make sure we don’t have enough time for this second story. The anniversary of 911 is coming up. Oh god. Yeah, at some point, we did a 911 sex story, and I hope we don’t have to hear it again. Today’s episode of crude summer is brought to you by Adamandeve.com the number one adult toy superstore with a little something for everyone. Look guys, this is a judgment free zone. And I know some of you are into some pretty weird shit. Don’t worry Adam and Eve has you covered. For instance, let’s say you’re straight, but you like the feeling of a little penetration or a lot of penetration and not just penetration but you like the feeling of stuff gushing into your asshole, but you’re not gay. You love ladies, you love the pussy. You just want your prostate stimulated and maybe power washed. I don’t know. What did I say just a few seconds ago Adam and Eve had you covered with the natural real skin squirting penis with harness because sometimes you just want to get thrust the squirt crazy and why not so grab some lovin and get your natural real skin squirting Venus all slick and slippery for hot rod staying with a real happy ending, squirt. When you squeeze the balls. For those times. You’re just craving some love lava. Now maybe you don’t want to get slammed in the butt and that’s okay, I guess. Adam and Eve has thousands of products from Maybe you want a bigger penis. They’ve got penis pumps. They’ve got pills. I don’t know what the pills do but they’ve got pills or ointments or something necessities like condoms and lube stuff for women stuff for guys if it’s sexual in nature Adam and Eve has you covered they have an amazing deal for you pick out any one item,

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Jazzercise Is Still Around And I Want Some Of That Marketshare

Angry Customers Filming Their Rage

3:45AM Beer Shits

You’re Not Transracial! You Just Like Asian Food

The Poop Bomber Has His Day In Court

Another Hitler Is In The News

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Hurricane Dorian Needs To Start Destructing Stuff Now!

Mom And Stepdad Epic Meltdown In front Of Junior WATCH!

Laying Flowers On The Plates Of Meat Eaters

When Breakups Get Messy During A Livestream

The Smell of Cooked Meat Should Be Illegal

The Christian Race Doesn’t Believe In Mixed Marriages

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

Get 10 Free Gifts including 6 movies, free shipping, and more! Use coupon code FREAK at checkout @ AdamAndEve.Com!

Welcome To Distorted View’s Crude Summer!

Each week we will take a dip into DV’s pool of disgusting, poorly written, and just weird erotic fan fiction/ sex stories that have been featured over the past 15 years of the podcast. I originally read these stories to you during a segment called Sextastic Tuesday, which aired just about every week (on Tuesday’s, naturally) and creeped out a generation of freaks. Every weekend this summer we will relive some of these abominations.

This week: Fan-fiction comes in all shapes, sizes, and varieties. Today,  I share two very different piece of literotica. First, X-men gone wild! It’s a Mutant sex free-for-all. The second story was featured during DV’s very first year and involved Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth scissoring and getting syrupy together on the store shelf.

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

Hastily AI’ed Transcription Of Today’s Show:

Fanfiction comes in many forms. It’s not unusual for those obsessed with a TV show, movie, comic book or video game to fantasize about living in that world participating in the story and interacting with the characters. A big part of the fan fiction community of course, is mature literature, you know sex stories based on the Golden Girls or Herbie the love bug or Duck Tales. Those are all very real things you can find on the internet. Today I’ve got two pieces of fanfiction, one involving mutants and the other involving pancake syrup bottles. Crude summer starts in just a moment.

Today’s episode of crude summer is brought to you by Adamandeve.com the number one adult toy superstore with a little something for everyone. Look guys, this is a judgment free zone and I know some of you are into some pretty weird shit. Don’t worry, Adam and Eve has you covered. For instance, let’s say you’re straight, but you like the feeling of a little penetration, or a lot of penetration and not just penetration but you like the feeling of stuff gushing into your asshole. But you’re not gay. You love ladies, you love the pussy. You just want your prostate stimulated and maybe power washed. I don’t know. What did I say? Just a few seconds ago Adam and Eve had you covered with the natural real skin squirting penis with harness strap it on start thrusting and start squatting like the real thing because sometimes you just want to get thrust the squirt crazy and why not? So grab some love and get your natural real skin squirting Venus. All slick and slippery for hot rod staying with a real happy ending, squirt when you squeeze the balls. That’s right. Get your lady friend to strap on this penis and squirt like an X rated volcano. For those times you’re just craving some love lava. For a limited time get 50% off just about any it...

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Outtakes From Dragon Ball Z Caused Twitter Outrage

Political Candidate Drops An N Bomb On The Radio

Videogame Streamer Visits His Dead Mom For The Views

A Slip And Slide Greased Up With Sex Lube

I’m A Butt Plug Hacker

Nurse Does A Ventriloquist Act With Patient’s Vagina

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Youtuber Gets Emotional Over New Star Wars Trailer

Cam Whore Gets Emotional Getting Her Twat Zapped

Kermit Wants To Break Free

If You Think Your Penis Is Too Small, You Probably Have a Mental Illness

Porn Hub Saves The Planet

Beaten With a Dead Pigeon

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

ON TODAY’S EPISODE:

Messy Ramen Noodle BJ

Racist Political Candidate Says NO THANK YOU to Race Mixing

When You Want To Be A Beauty Vlogger But You Too Damn Ugly

Yoko Ono Now Has a Saxophone To Back Her Screaming Up

Sex Pig Laser Beams

Japanese Train Perverts Learn To Airdrop Dickpics

Our New Post Office Box Address!

Distorted View PO Box 9575 Cincinnati Ohio 45209

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

 

Get 10 Free Gifts including 6 movies, free shipping, and more! Use coupon code FREAK at checkout @ AdamAndEve.Com!

Welcome To Distorted View’s Crude Summer!

Each week we will take a dip into DV’s pool of disgusting, poorly written, and just weird erotic fan fiction/ sex stories that have been featured over the past 15 years of the podcast. I originally read these stories to you during a segment called Sextastic Tuesday, which aired just about every week (on Tuesday’s, naturally) and creeped out a generation of freaks. Every weekend this summer we will relive some of these abominations.

This week: There has been a lot of talk in the news from politicians who believe video games are to blame for the recent uptick in gun violence in America. Today, I share with you two stories from DV’s history that involve video games to prove these attacks are unfounded. Instead, these stories contain a LOT of sexual violence. So, there’s that. Enjoy!

BE A PART OF THIS STUPIDITY:

Voicemail:  206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

A new way to help support Tim / Distorted View – Check out our Patreon page

Get more Distorted View! Become a True and Honorable Freak: Sign Up For The Sideshow

Hastily AI’ed Transcription Of Today’s Show:

Video games have been in the news recently with politicians blaming them for the increase in gun violence here in America. Today on crude summer I’ve got a pair of video game related sex stories that prove this is a myth. Video games don’t promote gun violence, they promote sexual violence that’s a completely different type of violence. So their current summer starts in just a moment. Distorted views crud summer is brought to you by AdamAndEve.Com the number one adult toy superstore in the world. I’d love to tell you about every single one of their 19,000 movies but blogs, clips, stimulators, and COC rings, but I only have a few minutes to tell you about a select few to help me choose which items from Adam and Eve’s vast catalog to talk about. Let’s go to the big board. The board is full of amazing products from the ass chasm, penis ring, plug just Clip master penis sleep. There’s no bad choice here but let’s start the board. See some jelly here. We landed on high of love pheromone perfume get ready to stink in a good way to Cologne uses and roasted all to attract women while repelling other men as think you want to do is start attracting them. This will leave the field wide open for you to turn their pants off without any competition getting in your way. That’s I have loved pheromone Park food. Let’s go back to the bone. Penis pumps look good naked come in handy. couplets lace up Coursera think that’s my thing, but it could be system clean out your rear quickly and easily with this travel for Do that’s right get squeaky clean for backdoor play what the butler do system it’s a brace to use even for first timers cuz No one likes shit dick as you can tell Adam and Eve has quite a wide range of products and they have an amazing deal just for you for a limited time.