Doing Divorce Different with Lesa Koski

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. Today we are talking about connecting with your future self, and how to make that future version of yourself a reality. If you are connected to your painful past, you are feeling the fear of duplicating your past. It keeps you stuck or stunted. Decide who your future self is, so you can use him or her to make decisions about today. The three steps to getting to your future self are to begin seeing who you are in the future, feeling into it, and finding your knowing that it's possible to be that next version of you. Tune in to learn the benefits and exercises to connect with the future version of you!  Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes; new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources

Be Your Future Self Now

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

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Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Are you in the beginning steps of a divorce process and wondering how spousal support or maintenance works? This encore episode walks through everything you need to know from family law attorney, Michelle Kniess. She discusses what information is necessary to determine maintenance support to ensure that both sides are equally represented. Michelle and I also talk about the difference between how I support my clients through mediation and how she helps her clients 1:1. We talk about what it looks like if the person receiving spousal support moves in with someone new and how that can impact the amount they get. Tune in to learn what you need to be aware of while going through a divorce that requires maintenance support and how to know what to ask for. 

In this episode:

• [4:05] Michelle shares her story of how she got into her current career.
• [8:31] What does it look like when Michelle is working with a client and determining what they need for maintenance?
• [13:57] What is the expectation of how long alimony will last, and what are the expectations for the person getting maintenance? 
• [17:28] When does maintenance end and what factors go into the duration?
• [19:16] What happens when the person getting maintenance moves in with someone and is sharing expenses? 
• [23:20] Can a couple make the decision to determine their own agreement on maintenance that the court cannot change?

Key Takeaways: 

• [7:15] It’s so important for you to understand what your expenses are and what they’re going to be after divorce so you can understand if spousal support is needed (and if it’s available), or if there are things you need to change regarding your lifestyle, home, or job to be able to stay within your budget.
• [15:48] The person receiving the maintenance can do what they want with their life, if they don’t want to work, they don’t have to, but at some point the court will assume that there’s going to be a level of income earned or that should be earned if the person is fully capable of generating income on their own. 
• [23:23] There are three things that you have to talk about with maintenance, and that is amount, duration and modifiability. If it is ordered by the court then it can be modifiable because the court and the law recognize that there’s changes in circumstances that can happen as life moves forward. 

Quotes: 

[9:02] “When then your marriage is ending and you're finding yourself in this position where you're going to have to be separate and no longer follow this plan, we have to take a look at what are the resources and what are the needs? I mean, that's about as basic as I can put it. And it's a very emotional topic for parties, whether you're on the receiving side or the paying side.” - Michelle Kniess

[21:00] “So you're examining this relationship and trying to make all sorts of crystal ball predictions about it. When you really have no idea what's going to happen there. One thing that's really important about cohabitation is there is no legal obligation attached to that for the person living with the obligee spouse to support that person.” - Michelle Kniess 

[27:29] “A buyout means perhaps somebody gets more property than they would otherwise get just to pay for perhaps a care on waiver or part of the maintenance award.” - Michelle Kniess

Guest Bio: 

Michelle Kniess devotes her entire practice to family law in Minnesota and Wisconsin. Her practice focuses on divorce, custody and parenting time, spousal maintenance, child support, and property valuation and division, including business interests. Michelle practiced as a business litigation attorney prior to pursuing a career in family law. She owned and managed a boutique family law practice for nearly nine years. Michelle brings many years of experience and vast knowledge of family law, in both Minnesota and Wisconsin. 

Michelle received her Juris Doctor from the University of Wisconsin-Madison in 2005 and her Bachelor of Science degree in Business Management from the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse in 2002. 

Resources: 

Messerli Kramer (since the recording of this episode, Michelle has now moved to Messerli Kramer) 

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. Instead of just 2x’ing your life, imagine you decided to ask yourself what is currently impossible, and then chase after that ‘impossible’ thing, and end up 10x’ing your life? That’s the topic Traci Pleschourt of SelfMadeU, and I talk about today: How to dream up a new goal, focus your time on it, and change your life. We typically spend 20% of our time focusing on the changes we really want to make, and 80% of our time being distracted by things that have nothing to do with our big goal. What if instead, you took a chance on yourself, and zeroed in on the 20%. Tune in today for some great tips from my coach Traci on how to accomplish this! Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes; new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources

10x Is Easier Than 2x

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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How do you know when it’s time to divorce? That’s a question I often receive from clients, so I decided to bring on Divorce Coach and Author, Kate Anthony to help answer this question. During this encore episode, we discuss what to look at when you are considering divorce and how to determine if divorce is the right decision for you. We also talk about why many women are unhappy in their marriages, and if that is a reflection of the marriage itself or the life that they are living. We ended the episode with a discussion around how to know if you are in a relationship with a narcissist and if the diagnosis even really matters. Kate is someone that I’ve looked up to for a long time, I love her podcast and I’ve even taken some of her courses to help me with mediation. She is such a joy to learn from, I can’t wait for you to tune in. 

In this episode:

• [4:20] Kate shares what led her to do the work that she’s doing now. 
• [8:18] What are the first things to look at when thinking about getting a divorce? 
• [11:25] Why do women get unhappy in their marriage?
• [18:25] Kate gives her insight on when people are married and there is nothing wrong with their marriage, but that they have fallen out of love. 
• [23:22] How to know if your spouse is a narcissist and what to do about it.
• [28:24] Kate offers a piece of advice for helping women reach the decision if they are truly wanting a divorce or not. 

Key Takeaways: 

• [11:33] Women are so over stretched with everything that they have on their plates and are carrying an unequal load compared to their husbands. Society has women working, paying the bills, keeping up the house, being the main caregiver for the children, and managing everything that comes with those tasks such as doctor appointments, extracurricular activities, presents for special occasions, etc. Then they also have to be the ones to care for their husband and understand his flaws and balance those out as well. 
• [16:34] There has been a study done that shows the happiest people in Western culture are married men. The second happiest are single women, the third happiest are single men. Married women are the least happy people in Western culture. 
• [21:57] A loving relationship is when both spouses feed the health, safety, and sanctity of the relationship. When both people are willing to put in the work to help the other be fulfilled and find happiness, while also doing the work on themselves, the marriage is a happier place to be.

Quotes: 

[11:33] “Women are unhappy in their marriages because marriage, the institution as we understand it or as we live it today, benefits men on the backs of women and our labor, whether it's domestic labor, emotional labor, we're carrying an absolutely unequal load.” - Kate Anthony

[13:22] We spend so much time going, ‘but he had a really hard childhood and I understand why he is the way that he is and it's really hard for him.’ And okay, I can understand the way that he is and have compassion, great compassion. But I'm not going to have more compassion for his childhood wounding than I am for how he's dumping that on me.” - Kate Anthony

[16:10] “Feminism means that you believe that women have equal rights to men and should have them under the law and in our culture and in relationships. Like that's, this is not a bad word unless you're in a relationship or a system that very, very, very much depends upon us not having that equality, which most relationships do.” - Kate Anthony

Guest Bio: 

Kate Anthony is the author of The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage, host of the critically acclaimed and New York Times recommended podcast The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast and the creator of the groundbreaking online coaching program, Should I Stay or Should I Go? which helps women make the most difficult decision of their lives using coaching tools, relationship education, geeky neuroscience, community support, and deep self-work. Kate is certified as a Domestic Violence Advocate, a Co-Parenting Specialist, and a High Conflict Divorce Coach.

Resources: 

Kate Anthony's Website

The D Word Book 

The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast

The Divorce Survival Guide Instagram

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. For the next four weeks, my coach Traci Pleschourt, will be talking about connecting with our future selves. This week we are talking about connecting with your past. We start by encouraging you to look at how far you’ve come instead of focusing on the past or what you have left to do to reach your goals. We discuss having faith in God and faith in the direction that you are going. Then we talk about how to look backwards from the right perspective. Tune in to learn how to suffer less and feel motivated. Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes; new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources

The Gap and The Gain Book

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Holidays can be tough when you are divorced, but coming up with a strategy to enjoy them is possible! I am discussing 7 things you can do to help your children and yourself navigate the holidays. From creating new traditions, to having expectations around finances, and even dealing with high conflict parenting situations, I have some wonderful ideas throughout this episode. Tune in to learn more ways to make your holiday special after divorce. 

In this episode:

• [2:48] How do kids feel during the holidays when their parents are divorced and how can you support them with those feelings?
• [7:59] 7 things you can do to help your children through the holidays.
• [14:01] How to manage the holidays if you are in a high-conflict parenting situation.

Key Takeaways: 

• [9:02] Discuss the holiday schedule with your children so they are not left wondering what the time out of school might look like. Provide them with clarity of how the schedule will look, and answer any questions they may have. 
• [10:52] Find some new traditions you can start with your children. There may be opportunities to do activities that weren’t an option while you were married. Quality time with your kids is what matters most to them. 
• [13:22] Prioritize your own self care. Have empathy with yourself and make sure that you are taking care of yourself so you can take care of your children well. 

Quotes: 

“I know there's lots of tricky things involved, but you can set the tone for a positive experience. So the greatest thing that you can do is to be united with the other co-parent and work together and let the kids see that you are working together.” - Lesa Koski

“My childhood memories of Christmas, I think the best ones are when we did something. I don't remember the gifts that I got, but I remember the time that we spent together. So remember that your kids just need time with you as simple as going sledding down a hill and getting hot cocoa.” - Lesa Koski

“You need to take care of yourself so that you can take care of your children well. They need you more than anything. So make sure that you're in a good spot, you're doing the things to get your mind right so that you don't have to be stressed out and be easy on yourself. If you are struggling to have empathy, it is a tough time of year, but you can help your children thrive through the holidays.” - Lesa Koski

Resources: 

A Kid With Two Homes Instagram

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. If you’ve ever been unclear about what a therapist is vs what a coach is, this is a great episode that breaks it down. Lesa talks about her experience working with a coach, and digs in to where a therapist might be able to future help her with other things she is dealing with. You’ll also hear about the difference of working with an attorney vs a mediator. Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes and new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources

Jill Barnett Kaufman’s Website

8 Guidelines for Separated and Divorced Parents

Separation and Divorce Support Community Facebook Page

Jill Barnett Kaufman’s Instagram

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Are you concerned about how your divorce will impact your children? Or confused about whether you need to hire a divorce coach, mediator, or an attorney? This week I interviewed divorce coach Jill Barnett Kaufman who answers all of these questions! She discusses her own experience going through divorce after years of counseling trying to save her marriage. Jill talks about the impact it had on her children and what their feedback is now that they are adults. You’ll hear a breakdown of the difference between a therapist and a coach and how each can help you with different areas of life. Jill ends the episode talking about how parents can protect their children while going through divorce. Tune in for some great insight from Divorce Coach Jill. 

In this episode:

• [2:26] Jill shares her story of how she came to be a divorce coach. 
• [5:40] What did Jill mean by saying that she was hurting her kids by getting divorced?
• [8:03] What was Jill’s experience working with an attorney and disagreeing with the decisions her attorney recommended?
• [11:45] What is the difference between a therapist and a coach?
• [13:41] Lesa shares a story about her experience working with a coach.
• [15:58] What are things that people can do to protect their kids through a divorce?
• [20:33] Jill provides advice about what would have helped her while going through her divorce. 

Key Takeaways: 

• [8:36] There are a lot of good attorneys out there, but there are also a lot of attorneys who don't understand the emotional toll that it takes to fight for things, even if you're entitled to them. You have to weigh all of that when you go through a divorce.
• [11:56] The difference between a therapist and a coach is that a therapist will look at your past, what trauma you have experienced, what has happened in your childhood to work through those issues. A coach is someone who looks into the current and the future to help create a plan of action for moving forward. They hold you accountable to your goals, and help you work on practical things. 
• [18:30] One benefit from children going through a divorce is that they learn to be more independent, flexible, and have individual relationships with each parent. It can create a great opportunity to build an amazing bond. 

Quotes: 

“And that is kind of the beauty when I work with clients. I call it designing your own divorce. You get to make the calls. I'm not going to give you any advice, but I want you to understand the law. And then it's up to the two of you to come to a conclusion about what seems fair.” - Lesa Koski

“I always tell people this: divorce is 10 percent legal, 10 percent financial and 80 percent emotional.” - Jill Barnett Kaufman

“We don't step back and really take a look at what we want in our life for the long term, and we let time go by and things don't get done. Divorce is an opportunity to do something that you've never done to change your life in a positive way and take advantage of that opportunity and take advantage of that time and think about what made you happy when you were a kid or when you were a young adult that you weren't able to do for the past years, because you were too busy and get those things into your lives because we have more time than we realize and we have to use that time wisely because it's a gift, and so taking advantage of this opportunity when we can focus on the negatives and really get frustrated, or we can look at it as, this is an opportunity to change our lives and really make it what we want.” - Jill Barnett Kaufman

Guest Bio: 

Jill Barnett Kaufman, LCSW, is a Licensed Therapist, Divorce Coach, Author & Co-parenting Expert. After going through her own difficult divorce, she made it her life’s mission to help others not have it so tough. Her book and course, I’m Getting Divorced, Now What? and her transformative group coaching program help parents navigate the overwhelming process of divorce with less stress, more confidence and a greater sense of peace. She’s recently married and the mother of 3 adult children and 3 adult step children.

Resources: 

Jill Barnett Kaufman’s Website

8 Guidelines for Separated and Divorced Parents

Separation and Divorce Support Community Facebook Page

Jill Barnett Kaufman’s Instagram

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. This week on the podcast we talked a lot about the reasons why we are seeing more gray divorces as well as what it looks like to enter into the dating world when over 50. It can be easy to think you are too old for love or dating, but the truth is we all need love! If you’ve decided that you are ready to meet your next partner and want some strategy tips, tune in today for some tips! Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes; new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources: 

Love Science Website

Love Factually 10 Proven Steps from I Wish to I Do

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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In today’s episode I am joined by my dear friend, Dr. Duana Welch. Dt. Duana has been on the show a couple times, and today we are really focusing on dating advice after a gray divorce. We talk about why gray divorces are happening more often and what the reasons may be behind that. Dr. Duana educates us on what individualism is and how it impacts relationships. She then shares some advice on how to start dating after divorce, setting up your dating profile, and what things to look for in a future love in hopes that it’ll last forever! Tune in to hear some great tips and learn more about love and lasting relationships. 

In this episode:

• [3:17] Dr. Duana Welch shares her story of finding love again after divorce.
• [5:37] Why are gray divorces happening more often?
• [10:41] Why has individualism started to develop in long term marriages?
• [11:40] What can someone do to prepare themselves for finding love later in life?
• [13:49] Are we less happy because of individualism? 
• [18:35] What are the steps for a woman to find love?
• [29:31] A final piece of advice from the love doctor.

Key Takeaways: 

• Every year that a man is single, whether he's single because his wife died or because he never got married, or because he's divorced, or any combination of these, as soon as he's single, his odds of death from all known causes increases by a factor of six. This is not as high for women because they tend to have more social support.
• Science shows that when people are looking at dating apps, they’ll likely swipe right on people who are 10% better looking than they are. The likelihood of you choosing who to date only based on looks won’t lead you to matching with your perfect partner. Learning more about their character is more important than their looks. 
• If you can find and be someone kind and respectful, your love life is going to go great. And if you can't, it will not.

Quotes: 

“In an individualist society, people tend to have a longer strategy of adulthood. So what that means is they get married later and everything about their life happens a little bit later and there's just not the taboo about divorce that there used to be. So, I think those are a lot of the reasons why this phenomenon is happening, but I also know from research that we never stop needing love.” - Dr. Duana Welch

"If you don't ever have to sign on for problems, then you probably aren't going to sign on for relationships because relationships bring joy, but they also bring challenges. What we need is not necessarily collectivist or individualist. We need interdependence. We need to find someone where we help each other feel safe enough where we can mutually depend on each other and we can mutually put the other person's needs co-equal with ours. In the absence of that, you're going to find a lot of unhappiness and even higher divorce rates.” - Dr. Duana Welch

“Men routinely read women as interested in them who make full eye contact while smiling at them with a real eye crinkling smile.” - Dr. Duana Welch

Guest Bio: 

Dr. Duana Welch (pronounced DWAY-nah) is known for dating advice, dating coaching, online dating coaching, relationship advice, relationship coaching, and marriage coaching that relies on science rather than opinion to help men and women find and keep the love of their lives. A former professor in Florida, California, and Texas across 20 years, she has contributed to NPR, PBS, Psychology Today, and numerous other outlets and podcasts. Her first book, Love Factually: 10 Proven Steps from I Wish to I Do, is now out globally in five languages; its revised and updated edition released in 2022. Love Factually for Single Parents is the second book in the series, specifically geared for finding the right partner not only for readers, but their families. All Duana’s books rely on science rather than opinion to help men and women find and keep the right partner. She is an expert for Paired, the couples relationship app. Her client practice is global, via Zoom and other technologies.

Want more love in your life? Whether you’re single, partnered, or questioning anything about relationships, get coaching with Dr. Duana Welch.

Resources: 

Love Science Website

Love Factually 10 Proven Steps from I Wish to I Do

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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