Dull Crayons

Dinosaurs, Goomba's and Bamba, oh my! Also, Julian confuses famous American painter Ed Hopper with famous American spousal abuser Dennis Hopper for a good five minutes (Official Dull Crayons' position: Easy Rider Sucks!), reveals his plain pizza eating habits, and Gabriel's great shame comes out: he memorized the number to Domino's as a kid. Plus, extensive, in-depth coverage of school lunch. Stay tuned, stay dull.

"God creates dinosaurs, God destroys dinosaurs, God creates Man, Man kills God, Man brings back dinosaurs." (Jeff Goldblum as Ian Malcolm in Jurassic Park)

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Prior to the Snack Report break, BX Tony and Gabriel have the rawest, realist convo that has ever taken place on the pod: proper sunblock application. Folks, this one gets uncomfortably real. To lighten the mood, they then got tipsy and free style children's literature over hot beats.

Also, Gabriel gets a little too toasty and confuses verklepmt with chutzpah, and he'll never forgive himself. You don't want to miss this one.

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It's a banger, people, and a podcast first: guest host in the studio! Tony from the Bronx and Gabriel sit down to drink some Dew and Macallan, discuss WeWork's ill-advised venture into education, the trauma of Chopped Jr., and kids growing up to damn fast. Period.

"A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animas and you know it." ~Kay, Men In Black

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BREAKING NEWS: Oklahoma is in a fiscal and schooling crisis and only the Dull Boys can help. Well, actually, they can't do anything about it. But Gabriel does give a hot take on Star Wars and nothing will ever be the same again, and he sells away teacher's summer vacations for a three day weekend.

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I mean really? Doesn't the title just say all you need to know? ... Fine. This week, the Dull Boys dig deep into the bag and reveal their love affair with BD Wong, defective food stuffs, and Brandeis. Also, there's a buncha Die Hard dissection. Something for everyone.

And don't miss the very special reading at the end of the show.

No, this will not be the nostalgia-orgy that Stranger Things is, but it is significantly funnier. This week we look at strange ass schools around the globe, what even defines a school as a school versus a museum or a waste of time, and our upcoming project: Mall-Bratz!!!

Also, Harley Quinn Smith: if you are listening, we want to have you on the podcast. Write to us at [email protected]

The Dull Boys finally reveal their Wonderlic scores (sorry Gabe), discuss the mass banning of dodgeball around the country (#freedodgeball???), and marvel at the new sport craze that kids are just ga-ga over: GaGa!

Note: show producer Scotty was asleep at the wheel for this one, ignoring the radiator hissing at the mid-point. He has been corporally punished for his negligence. If you have other suggestions as to how Scotty should be disciplined, send them to [email protected]

This week, Julian teaches us all a thing or two about football--because that's how many things he knows on the subject--and we discuss the infamous Wonderlic test and read out sample questions.

TEASER: on next week's show, we reveal our own Wonderlic scores. You can find the free sample of the entire test here https://samplewonderlictest.com/, and send us your scores and associated profession or football position at [email protected]

This week, Adam and Jamie tackle the myth of the Mozart Effect and other popular psychological bunk. They also unveil a new solution to the energy crisis, theories of evolution, and... well, you'll just have to listen and find out.

Santa has his list of kids (creepy), Judah Maccabee had his list of Seleucid's to slaughter (slay all day, Judah), and the Dull Crayons have their holiday list: inductees to the Toy Hall of Fame. In this bonus holiday spectacular we also rhyme words, discuss sport halls of fame, and we unveil our new catchphrase: "Make Me a Pizza!"