Welcome back for the next journey of The Family Express Podcast with Kathryn de Bruin and Ronda Evans where our destination is resilient and connected families. Today’s guest is Dalia Sileem-Naguib who will speak with us about engaging Muslim Families with Cultural Humility and Understanding. All Aboard !

Dalia opens our conversation speaking about the families she works with and the presenting issues and therapy experiences that parents/families would tell her about in the beginning of the therapy work together.

We touch on discrimination, Islamaphobia, and lack of knowledge, negative pre-conceived notions or assumptions about Islam and Muslim families that may deter family therapists from working with Muslim families.

Dalia describes that we are recording this episode during Ramadan, the holiest month in Islam, and describes that is a time of great self-reflection and focus on faith soul through taking away the basic necessities of food and water.

Ronda tells a story and that segues Dalia into talking about acceptable accommodations for Muslims.

Dalia provides listeners with the acronym of SALAM to help guide our approach to working with Muslim families. SALAM is inspired from the Muslim phrase Salam alaikum which means peace upon you.

S - safety. Establish safety to help clients feel safe and comfortable with therapist to explore the client's inner world.

A - appreciate. Appreciate that there is great diversity within every single individual and every single Muslim client, and within the Muslim faith and diversity in the people practicing.

L - lay of the land - Explore what is happening with this family and their presenting issue. What is the family having a hard time with?What kind of Islamic umbrella or foundation are they trying to instill? What are they dealing with in this environment that they're in? Is there a generational gap? Is there a faith-based level gap? Is there a developmental issue? And ultimately, the family disconnect comes down to a stuckness in the process of relaying these messages to each other. Dalia makes explicit that for many Muslim families the word fear keeps repeating itself -- fear underpins the stuckness. And for the kids, autonomy and acceptance keeps coming up. Can I be who I am ? Parents, can you accept me for who I am? Kids have been taught that they want the acceptance of their parents and ultimately Allah's acceptance, and the kids wants autonomy.

A - alliance. Establish a working alliance through being curious, open, non-judgmental, accepting of them the family as they are, and work towards buy-in.

M - modest. Approach Muslim families with cultural humility and modesty. Let them know that you don't know.

Dalia provides a generalized storytelling example of a family who is struggling with fear and acceptance and autonomy. Dalia explains that knowledge and awareness of the fears that are underpinning a parent's rules or shut down or refusal can be an antidote to the parental fears.

Dalia describes that Muslims and Muslims parents are guided by two things: the Quran and the Sunnah. Muslims are obliged to inform their children about how to navigate life, walking the path, walking the Islamic way, and then the parent submits. In Islam, the most important thing is to submit.

We clarify that clinicians can reframe the family stuckness, such as in this example, as a developmental issue, and it's not a religious or value issue.

Kathryn introduces the concept of faith development and wonders if this could be tricky to use with families. Dalia adds that a faith development could be helpful by then circling back to parents inform and then submit, accept where your kids are, submit to Allah and let go.

Thank you for listening! 

Kathryn is an ICEEFT Certified EFT Trainer. Kathryn and Ronda are both licensed marriage and family therapists, EFT supervisors and therapists, and AAMFT Approved Supervisors.

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You can follow Dalia Sileem-Naguib

Email: [email protected]

Website: www.egyceft.com