Ever since Kate Downey got her first extremely painful period at age 14, every month feels like playing Russian roulette with her uterus. Will she get “normal” abdominal discomfort — or excruciating, life-disrupting “death cramps”? After decades of not knowing the cause of her pain,  Kate set out to find an answer to her very own medical mystery…and she shares with Anita how what she uncovered has implications for many other menstruating people.

Meet the guest:

- Kate Downey is the creator and host of CRAMPED, a podcast investigating period pain

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When technology creators see problems … they fix them. No less is true for trans designers, who for decades have responded to emergent needs in their community with technological innovation. Trans scholar Oliver Haimson tells Anita why it's vital to understand the role of trans technology in this particular political moment. He shares stories from the hundreds of technologies he’s explored — everything from bathroom-finding apps to augmented reality — that both support trans folks’ tangible needs and help reimagine new worlds.

Meet the guest:

- Oliver Haimson is the author of "Trans Technologies" and an assistant professor at the University of Michigan School of Information

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Special thanks to Hibby Thach for her contributions to this episode!

Despite a decade of restrictive behavior and a career path in mental health counseling, Alishia McCullough had never associated herself with the phrase eating disorder. She’s not alone – while eating disorders affect all races and ethnicities at similar rates, people of color are less than half as likely to receive a diagnosis than their white counterparts. She talks to Anita about how an aha moment in grad school led her to better understand how to treat eating disorders in Black women’s bodies — starting with her own.

Meet the guest:

- Alishia McCullough is the author of "Reclaiming the Black Body: Nourishing the Home Within" and a licensed mental health therapist

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When Anita moved away to college, she experienced a big shift in her biracial identity. Turns out that the questions that emerged for her are ones that many mixed young adults still ponder today ...15 years later. She meets two college seniors and they talk through navigating everything from "Where do I belong?" to "How do I date?" Plus she hears wisdom from a life coach who helps mixed adults tell new stories about identity.

Meet the guests:

- Adiah Siler, a senior at the University of the Arts in Philadelphia, explains how moving out of her small town to go to college allowed her opportunities to explore her Blackness and has influenced her journey as a mixed race person

- Claire Gallagher, a senior at the University of Michigan, shares her own experiences growing up as a mixed race person and brings up some of the anxieties she's had about her identity, especially since attending a predominantly white college

- Sarah Lotus Garrett, a certified life and goal fulfillment coach, emphasizes the confidence and healing that being a part of a mixed race community can bring

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Please note: This episode originally aired July 14, 2023.

Updates: Adiah Siler is currently working on her MFA at the University of Iowa in the Writers’ Workshop.

Dig deeper:

Sarah’s program for mixed adults

Claire’s piece on the fetishization of mixed race identities

Adiah’s piece on being a mixed teen

When Celeste Gracia was 17, her religiously conservative parents sent her to conversion therapy. This was the same summer that the Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage, giving queer people across the country cause for celebration. It would take years before Celeste felt that same joy and freedom, and today, the 27-year-old environment reporter at WUNC talks with Anita about how recent political events are prompting her to reflect on her decade-long path to healing. Anita also talks to therapist Jonathan Bell about how Celeste’s story fits into a broader context and why religious trauma is so challenging to heal.

Meet the guests:

- Celeste Gracia is an environment reporter at WUNC who has spent a decade untangling her religious trauma

- Jonathan Bell is a a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in helping queer clients with religious trauma

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Most parents in Anita's life tell her that it's a relentless job ... so if you're doing it all without a partner, how is it possible to also sustain a relationship with sex and romance? Anita talks with two unpartnered moms about juggling pleasure, dating and parenthood.

Meet the guests:

- Tara Ilsley is a solo mom of a toddler and a public health worker

- Cordelia Gaffar is a single mom of six kids, an intimacy educator and a somatic movement facilitator

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Soph Myers-Kelley and his mom, René Myers, have always been close. As of five years ago, they also share a diagnosis: the connective tissue disorder Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. Soph and René were diagnosed one year apart – Soph was 25; René was 60. EDS explained symptoms they’d both been experiencing for decades, including waking up with jaw or shoulder dislocations and having chronic pain.The two talk with Anita about how their diagnoses began a new chapter of their lives, including the decision to move in together last summer.

Meet the guests:

- Soph Myers-Kelley is a medical librarian at East Carolina University

- René Myers is Soph's mom and a retired educator

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Food and sex have been deeply intertwined in our cultural imagination for millennia. Anita talks with a cultural historian who has combed through centuries of sex and food chronicles to understand what makes that connection so strong. Plus, Puerto Rican chef Manolo López shares a Valentine’s recipe and his favorite sexy food.

Meet the guests:

- Rachel Hope Cleves is a historian, a professor at the University of Victoria and the author of “Lustful Appetites: An Intimate History of Good Food and Wicked Sex"

- Manolo López is a Puerto Rican chef and storyteller

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In the hours and days following President Donald Trump’s re-election, online searches about leaving the U.S. surged. Historically, most folks who have considered a move haven’t taken action, but Tina Strawn is an exception. Anita talks to her about why, as a queer Black woman, she left America in 2020 in search of freedom. Tina answers listener's questions about expat life and shares why she encourages everyone to ask themselves: what would it feel like to be free?

Meet the guest:

- Tina Strawn, the author of “Are We Free Yet? The Black Queer Guide to Divorcing America”

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Anita is committed to self-improvement but skeptical of self-help. She brings her qualms and questions to the experts: Kristen Meinzer, a podcaster who has lived by the rules of more than 50 self-help books, and Beth Blum, a scholar who's traced the genre back to its roots. Plus Sondra Rose Marie, a former self-help fan, shares how the industry has failed her as a woman of color.

Meet the guests:

- Kristen Meinzer, pop culture commentator and podcast host, shares what she learned from following the rules of over 50 self-help books

- Beth Blum, Harvard humanities professor and author, talks about the long history of the self-help industry, and how it's changed over the decades

- Sondra Rose Marie, writer, talks about why she started following a self-help guru...and what events made her leave

Dig Deeper:

Kristen's podcasts How To Be Fine and Daily Fail

Beth's book "The Self-Help Compulsion"

Sondra's Medium article on self-help

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Please note: This episode originally aired January 5, 2024.

Updates: The latest season of Kristen Meinzer’s podcast “How To Be Fine” is all about the loneliness epidemic and friendship quandaries.

Sondra Rose Marie is now the editor and owner of the digital magazine for LGBTQ+ women called Tagg Magazine.