I was supposed to release this episode on Friday. Instead, I didn't start recording until Sunday night. Four years into recovery, the "f**k it phase" is still very much a part of my life. The procrastination, the putting things off, the feeling that nothing bad is actually going to happen...it didn't disappear when I stopped gambling. It just found new places to live. This week, my higher power sent a message in the form of a pickleball injury that I hope gets me back on the right track. 

I also recap the Midwest trip, my complicated feelings about Episode 100's performance, why I'm done caring about likes and downloads, and why lived experience will always connect differently than a degree — no matter what anyone in the comment section thinks.

If you’re struggling right now, you’re not alone.
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