Heart Wisdom with Jack Kornfield

Ep. 272 – The Art of Reconciliation: Cultivating Harmony Through Listening and Truth


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Jack helps us heal conflicts, release defensiveness, and cultivate the harmony of wise relationships through the art of reconciliation, deep listening, and truth.

This episode is brought to you by Betterhelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/heartwisdom and get on your way to being your best self.

“When we read about western civilization, it is in our history books as predominantly a history of conflict—who fought whom, who took over what kingdom, country, or land from someone else and conquered and triumphed. That conflict is still with us in very obvious ways, whether it is in Los Angeles, or Yugoslavia, or Somalia, Ethiopia, or Cambodia. And so, when we look at human civilization with such a long history of conflict, the question comes, can we learn another way to live as humans?” – Jack Kornfield

In this episode, Jack mindfully explores:

  • Buddhist teachings on community, conflict, and living harmoniously
  • If modern civilization is actually all that civilized
  • Aristotle on humanity’s weapons of wisdom and virtue
  • The historical evolution of human consciousness and compassion
  • Types of slavery, overt and hidden: physical, economic, political, clandestine
  • The spirituality of truly celebrating life in this present moment
  • Wise Relationship, living harmoniously, listening in a way that honors everyone
  • Creating a ‘wise culture’ built on honesty and integrity
  • How to truly apologize, forgive, reconcile, and renew
  • Wise mechanisms for diffusing conflict
  • How to stop being defensive and start listening
  • Reconciling conflicts in monasteries and spiritual communities
  • How the ‘art of listening’ begins with the ‘art of letting go’
  • Learning to cooperate in courage, fearlessness, and honoring
  • Navigating life from our ‘unarmed truth’ and ‘Soul Force’


“To be able to enter into a process of reconciliation in one’s family, community or body-politic, is to be able to learn to let go of our views, our ideas, how it should be, what we want, what we fear—which is underneath all of those things. It’s a shift of our identity from this small sense of self that we carry often with us, to something that’s greater—the common good, the good of the earth, that which is beautiful and noble no matter what happens in the world around us—to some greater identity of our being.” – Jack Kornfield

“We all want that kind of respect—if you give nothing else to your lover, spouse, children, parents or colleagues, but just that quality of listening with respect—there’s this tremendous sweetness that comes, people love you for it. – Jack Kornfield

This Dharma Talk recorded on 7/27/1992 at Spirit Rock Meditation Center was originally published on DharmaSeed.

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