Kate inherits a bikini. Jacqueline praises Reddit. Elimination of caffeine, Andrew Johnson’s relaxation apps, and fresh flowers. Washing the brain. Power-washing the home. When you’re Half-you. The ocean as bucket. Jacqueline is “good at teaching.” Kate has Land Animal Primacy Issues. Children with past life memories.  
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This episode was edited and engineered by C. Tweedie.
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Every Pot Has Its Kettle

Wellness is a trillion-dollar industry full of scams and snake oil salesmen but comedians and best friends Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak just can’t get enough. Join them as they try products and practices, consult healers and experts, and ask the ultimate question: is it truly wellness they’re after or just the thrill of the chase?

Comedy

Alternative Health

Health

Health & Fitness

Beauty and wellness tips from two hogs. Sorry, which hole? Rest assured this is Vaudeville, there was no mirror. You wanna go to Kate’s Cafe? A 'W' so flowery it evokes music. Elizabeth & Sarah & Tracy & Me. The shoes are wet, but these feet don’t sweat. If there’s a Jacqueline link, the hags need to come through. She was pumped! Awe and concern at seeing both anus and V. There’s something kind of desert-pleasing about it. Eight. Plate. Settings. You think I'd have a Seder and not invite you? Wonder Oven Closure and Kate reacts to hearing 'Jack and Diane' for the first time.
Brands: Tower, FaceGym, Breville Bambino, The Tracy Anderson Method, Capezio, Skinskool
Begging For: Pure Lift, Our Place Slow Cooker & Always Pan
Edited and mixed by Allie Graham. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Two Hogs Sewn Together

Jacqueline enters in felted mules, stung. A doctor abused Kate by not taking her call. Extreme sport bandaids, flying hydrocolloidals. Acting is real and ADT is a scam. Major. Depressive. Disorder. A pharmacy run-in a la Magnolia while riding the generic wave, Jacqueline keeps going home med-less. Kate struggled with a VIP wristband and some of the most miserable men she's encountered. 'Darling' as a vessel for aggression. Radical acceptance, a joyless park ranger, and a crane.  Biting into a hot strawberry? Three nights of Acquapazza. Welcome to Cook’s Corner.
Brands discussed: Electrolytes: LMNT. SUPERIEUR. SIMPLISAFE. LILY's CHOCOLATE. MZ SKIN.
Big gifts have landed: WONDER OVEN & HUROM JUICER 
 
Edited and mixed by Allie Graham. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Torn Basil

Finally, a pharmacy with a restaurant! What if Kate was a big-jugged nurse on the night shift, and Jacqueline always ordered directly from the Goop Kitchen app? Dr. Loretta on the doorstep, and it really is much easier to bring those boxes through to the back... What’s wrong with having a little fun with yourself? A tooth un-fills and the comfort of this friendship through it all. Jar, but with someone else. A gentle way to start the day may be returning. There will be enough life jackets on the Poog Cruise. The pot is hot—but the stone? It’s 500 degrees. Put her to work, boys! Jacqueline debuts a new voice and explains how to raise a lap cat and hard seer cabbage. Rep yourself before you die!
Earnestly Begging for: Goop Kitchen vouchers, Pure Lift, 
Brands Mentioned: Dr. Loretta, Tower, Fenty, Charlotte Tilbury, Biologique Recherche
Edited & mixed by Allie Graham. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I Work Nights

The dream of a communist pharmacist and the control needed to not throw your phone against a wall. Often we must play the role. Driving while engaging the abs and the pride of seeing your daughter on screen. You wanna change your life? You’ll have to move every day, sweetie. Laughter that only the price of flowers can provoke & a mood so good you hold doors open too long. Whether stepping onto a stage or into an elevator, the nerves never go away. The relevancy of the headshot is questioned and a new torso is offered. This is literally the President of the United States of America. Where in film is the Aged Man? Rotten seed. Half plastic, half lead...the alien screaming within you. Mixing up algorithmic forces and fondly remembering the men who sold ice cream and smoothies. Hi babies! Staying up all night for your mental health. Hello???? Guys!?
Respectfully Begging For: Whoop, Apparis, Awan
Brands Mentioned: Rebel Ice Cream, Biodance Bio-Collagen Real Deep Mask
 
Edited and mixed by Allie Graham. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is Not My Friend

This week's episode is a re-airing of a Poog classic: The hags are bubbling over with excitement. Jacqueline wants help with her navicular accessory foot injury, but they discuss: Werner Herzog's Grizzly Man and Cave of Forgotten Dreams, red light therapy, Bonus rooms, Buster Keaton, Tartuffe, and Best Week Ever. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Every Pot Has Its Kettle

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