Cancel everything! We're starting over. This is no longer a podcast about ethics. This is a podcast about a Thomas the Tank Engine Romance Novel. You read that right. This episode may also contain the final Pokémon Stop, but who cares? Trains are kissing.

(We do, however, reveal our Tinder findings.)

Topics include: Thomas the Tank Engine Romance Novels, That's It, That's All That Matters (and Guns).

To swerve or not to swerve? That is the calculation that the future must make. In this classic dilemma, updated for the modern age, would you drive a car that might decide to kill you, instead of killing strangers like they're supposed to? Segments "Tinder Topic Title" and "The Pokémon Stop" return.

We chew gum loudly.

Topics include: The Trolley Problem Mark II, Normative vs. Applied Ethics, Abortion, Barely Legal Uber, and Guns.

Inspired by last episode's racial proclivities, we begin our own experiment to create the perfect catch-all offender. Speaking of catching all, for some reason Pokémon comes up, and we make some startling comparisons. A wild two new segments appear!

We create a Tinder profile for Half-Asians.

Topics include: The Eclipse, Pokémon, Tinder, Condom-en-Armagnac, and Guns.

While secretly recording a friend, we stumble upon a dilemma: Is it unethical to cherry-pick lovers based on ethnicity, or only to admit it? In other words, 'tis it better to have Xiahn and lost, or to never have Rachel Dolezal?

We rank the races.

Topics include: Half-Asians, Eugenics, FaceApp, Cloud Atlas, and Guns.

In which I act really awkward and shy the entire episode because my roommate is standing RIGHT THERE eating a sandwich or something, what is she doing in the kitchen, I am trying to record her dastardlily and it really isn't behooving to have this all play out this way.

We also reach our first verdict.

Topics include: Smegma, East vs. West, Orphans, and Guns.

In this semi-secretly also-inaugural episode, we make our first phone call to mixed (read: bad) results. We also delve into non-logistical discrete topics, all the while calculating our temperature. We have a theme song now!

We pick ourselves up by our bootlaces.

Topics include: Temperature Conversion, The Princess Paradox, Human Trafficking, Pilots, and Guns.

Welcome to the D-Town Coffee Room! In this inaugural episode, we try to tackle what this show will even be about! It is very much a work in progress. So far, we figure: are ethics good or bad?

We'll get there.

Topics include: Pleasure Island, Celebration, and Guns.