Feral Cycle Breakers

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower

It is time to get Unleashed 🎉🎉🎉

Unleashed is the most unique course to help you strip away all the shame, self-doubt, and struggle to live your most magical life!

This is for those of you that:

✅ Grew up with a narcissistic or emotionally unavailable parent/parents.

✅Have struggled with your relationships and sex life.

✅ See the red flags but question if you’re overreacting & being judgmental.

✅ Struggle to express exactly what you want and need from a partner.

✅ Use intimacy as a means to receive affection/love.

✅ Find yourself attracted to emotionally unavailable people.

✅ Always look to others to make you feel seen, loved, validated.

✅ Judge your appearance and think your attractiveness determines being good enough.

If you are a yes to any of these....

Then it’s time to get Unleashed!

The program starts May 8th but early bird pricing is open now till April 7th with $300 off!

Payment plans are available.

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower. Fear of rejection as a trauma response

What is a fear of rejection really?

Well, it's a fear of being abandoned by someone or something.

There are many different core wounds we experience in childhood.

Abandonment is one of those.

Now that doesn't always have to look like your basic needs glimg unmet or a parent being absent.

Abandonment can look like your parent(s):

* Not showing to up to support you for sports/dance/etc. activities.

* Choosing the other parent/a partner over you even when inappropriate.

* Not keeping promises or following through on things they agreed to.

* Ignoring you and neglecting to spend quality time with you.

There’s a lot of other ways this fear of abandonment comes up.

Point is, the fear exists.

That leads to subconsciously or consciously always worrying about being rejected.

Again, the rejection is really this fear of abandonment but you get the point.

You become so worried about being rejected (abandoned) that you begin to anticipate it.

You almost expect it which means you do 1 of 2 things:

1. You sabotage relationships or opportunities because better you get the jump on things falling apart vs them.

Or

2. You give up before you start because you don't trust things will work out so desires, relationships, or dreams go unfulfilled.

Either way, you're missing out on a lot of happiness!

Which leads me to the obvious question?

How do we let go of the fear and start welcoming in our happiness?!

For that you've gotta follow and listen to my podcast 😚

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower. We learn so much about ourselves in childhood.

We also learn expectations and limits on who we get to be from our parents/caregivers.

Actually about 80% of what we believe and think comes from childhood.

As our brains develop and learn to make sense of the world we form beliefs, patterns, and stories based on what we see and experience.

So without examining what we learned and how impacts us we essentially have inner children incharge of things like:

* Relationships

* Intimacy

* Careers

* Finances

and pretty much everything else!

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower. The APA Dictionary of Psychology says embodied cognition is the concept that:

“the human mind is largely determined by the structures of the human body (morphology, sensory and motor systems) and its interactions with the physical environment.”

AKA

Your body and the environment heavily influence what you think and feel!

In childhood, parents that teach us to ignore our feelings or physical boundaries and are controlling cause us to become disembodied.

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower. Raise your hand if you're a woman or AFAB person and you were told you were selfish growing up🙋‍♀️

Anytime you wanted attention, comfort, toys, clothes, food, activities, to take sports or dance lessons, etc.

You got told you were selfish!

Maybe the word selfish wasn't used but the implication was there when they came back with things like:

"quit asking for that, we don't have the money!"

or

"be happy with what you have"

or

"why are you always asking for things"

There're a million other variations but you get the idea, you were selfish!

Now as an adult you probably struggle with making any requests of people or doing things for yourself.

I know women who will wait until they're in unbearable pain to get a massage.

Then brag about finding a really cheap one because it makes it seems less indulgent aka selfish for getting one.

Yes, sometimes we are on a budget so funds dictate getting a cheaper massage but that's not why we mention the cost.

We do it to avoid seeming selfish and that's true whether or not we have kids.

The truth is you aren't selfish, you just had parents who didn't have the emotional capacity to handle their triggers and trauma when you needed anything.

They shamed you for having needs and wants and yes, wanting the "in clothes" to fit in is a need as a kid, unfortunately.

We know how easy it is to get bullied when you don't have the right...whatever.

What your parent(s) should've said in those moments is:

"I'm sorry you've been made fun of or outcast for not having the right shoes. You don't deserve that. Right now I don't have the funds to buy new ones but let's come up with another solution".

it may not have been the same but you wouldn't have felt selfish.

It goes beyond material things too because we were told we were selfish for our ambition, needs for emotional support, attention, and other things.

The bottom line is you aren't and weren't selfish and it's time to break free of that story!

What ways were you told you were selfish that you want to break free from?

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower You ever have that moment when you're all stressed out, trying to accomplish something and that voice pops in letting you know...

You ain't shit!!!

You know the voice, it's so critical of you.

It cuts you down and reminds you of every failure you've ever had or any flaw you possess.

It often sounds like one of your parents, making you feel just as small as when you heard/felt similar things as a kid.

It shuts you down and makes it really hard to do anything.

What if I told you that inner criticism is coming from a part that's just trying to protect you.

When the inner criticism starts it's because something about what you're dealing with or working on is reminding this part of the past.

Maybe you're trying to build a business, take a career leap, get a job, start dating again, work on a relationship issue, start a hobby, etc.

Whatever it is reminds this part of you of a time in childhood or as a young adult when you got shut down, criticized, judged, or made to feel bad.

This part probably learned to criticize you because that's how your parent/caregiver shot you down and so it does the same thing.

It's afraid of you experiencing the same intense pain you did when you were younger so it's using whatever it can to stop you.

As much as it sucks to experience the inner critic voice hopefully it helps you understand it's just trying to protect you.

Once you know that it's easier to show understanding and compassion, and then figure out how to soothe it!

Doing that reduces stress and helps you come up with ways to move forward and accomplish what you really want.

"It feels like a part of me just won't let me be happy"

or something similar to that?

Approaches in talk therapy have us looking at ourselves as if we have a singular identity, a singular part of us.

But in IFS or parts work we recognize that there are subconscious parts of us playing out different roles and formed for different reasons.

Think of it like the different hats daily: boss, partner, parent, child, friend, coworker, etc.

Sometimes those hats conflict and collide, some work together and some don't.

That's going on within our minds as well.

We have parts of us in conflict, colliding against what we want to do and who we want to be.

We have parts that are in conflict with each other too.

All these parts are sitting in a secret control room like in Inside Out either working together or fighting one another (or a little of both).

They develop at different stages of childhood and beyond to protect us which isn't always helpful.

Maybe 8-year-old you got made fun of a lot for being the "big kid" so now you either obsessively watch food or workout, causing issues.

Or you hide away to avoid ever being judged so you never start that business you have always wanted to start!

Maybe there's a part that you labeled your "love slut" and that's the version of you so obsessed with finding a partner to love you that you end up dating the worst people.

That love slut learned to do this when you were younger because it never got affection from mom and dad.

These parts all exist; with IFS we identify, understand, and work with them to do something healthier and more helpful.

That way, the issues you're dealing with get addressed and any of the stress, anxiety, depression, etc. they've caused also get addressed.

Best part of this method is once you know how to use it you can do it any time you notice an issue or pattern popping up.

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower. What happens when you do all that work on yourself and you find yourself struggling yet again? You’ve worked on the wound/pattern/belief and yet here you are on the cusp of greatness feeling like your brain is kicking you in the ass again? Listen in now as I share my own experiences with this and what I've done to help myself through!

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower Often when we grow up with parents that make love, praise, and acceptance very conditional we find ourselves performing in romantic relationships. We get hyper-focused on their pleasure in and out of bed because we feel like the only way to be loved, liked, and chosen is to perform just right. It's exhausting and often leaves us feeling empty and lonely. Listen in now if this resonates with you!

Check out all my current offers: https://linktr.ee/sensualpower

Ever experienced being the emotional support system for your parents) growing up?

You know, where they'd dump their relationship, financial, marriage, and other problems on you as if you were their friend or therapist?

Maybe you were responsible for making sure siblings were taken care of.

Maybe you were responsible for taking care of yourself.

Maybe you at some point had to get a job or do things to financially support the family or keep the house.

Yeah, that's called parentification and it has some harsh side effects!

When we experience parentification we can experience:

* A lot of hypervigilance to monitor the needs of others around us.

* Anxiety around trying to care for everything and everyone.

* Hyper Independence because we're used to doing it all ourselves and taking care of everyone.

* Struggling with setting boundaries or speaking up when emotionally tapped out because we're used to being a dumping ground.

* Struggles to create and maintain healthy coping skills because we're used to going until burn out.

Bottom line Parentification steals the ability to be a kid and makes a lot of struggle to prioritize our own rest, play, and needs.

If you feel like you're still struggling with these effects getting support is key!

I've opened up my schedule for more 1:I coaching spots this year.

That includes:

25 90 mins calls

30 mins whatsapp support weekly

Access to my grimoire full of self healing tools, meditations and even business building blueprints.

Plus my Pleasure Healing course with my 4 pt. Somatic trauma healing methodology.

Apply now or book a call to chat!

https://www.sensual-power.com/one-on-one-coaching