FILTHY @ FIVE (FILTHY FELLAS)

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SIGNINGS. SIGNINGS. SIGNINGS.

THEY MAKE OR BREAK FOOTBALL TEAMS. SOME TURN OUT TO BE WORLD-BEATERS. OTHERS? ABSOLUTE FLOPS. AND THEN THERE ARE THE ONES YOU’RE GLAD NEVER HAPPENED—TRUE BULLETS DODGED.

TAKE MYKHAILO MUDRYK, FOR EXAMPLE. WITH REPORTS SWIRLING ABOUT A POTENTIAL FOUR-YEAR BAN AFTER ALLEGEDLY TESTING POSITIVE FOR THE PERFORMANCE-ENHANCING DRUG MELDONIUM, ARSENAL FANS MIGHT JUST BE BREATHING A SIGH OF RELIEF. THEY WERE THIS CLOSE TO SIGNING HIM.

IN THIS MONDAY EPISODE, WE’RE DIVING INTO THE BIGGEST BULLETS DODGED IN THE PREMIER LEAGUE. FROM TRANSFER NEAR-MISSES TO LAST-MINUTE U-TURNS THAT SAVED CLUBS FROM DISASTER.

OH—AND WHO EXACTLY IS CRYSTAL PALACE’S MYSTERIOUS NEW 45% SHAREHOLDER, WOODY JOHNSON? WE’VE (ALLEGEDLY) GOT THE INSIDE SCOOP.

HAPPY FILTHY MONDAY.

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FOLLOW THE MANDEM

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MENACE https://www.instagram.com/mseven_____

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LIVERPOOL HAVE BEEN THE STARS OF THE SUMMER TRANSFER WINDOW. AFTER LANDING FRIMPONG, FLORIAN WIRTZ, AND NOW MILOS KERKEZ—WHILE ALSO SELLING JARELL QUANSAH TO BAYER LEVERKUSEN FOR A FEE HIGHER THAN ARSENAL HAVE EVER RECEIVED FOR A PLAYER—THEY'RE LOOKING MORE AND MORE LIKE A PERFECTLY OILED MACHINE.

MEANWHILE, THE GARNACHO-MANCHESTER UNITED SAGA HAS TAKEN ANOTHER TWIST. CURRENTLY HOLIDAYING IN IBIZA WITH SAVAGE DAN AND LOONS, GARNACHO WAS PHOTOGRAPHED WEARING AN ASTON VILLA SHIRT—WITH RASHFORD’S NAME ON THE BACK. WHAT DO WE MAKE OF THAT?!

ELSEWHERE, GYÖKERES AND ŠEŠKO ARE LOCKED IN A FIERCE BATTLE FOR ATTENTION—GYÖKERES THE FRONT-RUNNER, PERHAPS? WILLIAMS AND BARCOLA REMAIN OFF THE MARKET. AS FOR RODRYGO, IS HE REALLY WORTH THE PRICE BEING DEMANDED?

AND FINALLY, IS THERE GROWING CONCERN AMONG ARSENAL FANS THAT THEY’LL HEAD INTO NEXT SEASON WITH HAVERTZ AND MERINO AS THEIR ONLY STRIKER OPTIONS?

IT’S FILTHY TIME.

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FOLLOW THE MANDEM

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MENACE https://www.instagram.com/mseven_____

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NOT EVERYTHING IS BLACK AND WHITE… EXCEPT THIS DRAFT!

IN THIS CHAOTIC PREMIER LEAGUE-ONLY CHALLENGE, THE BOYS MUST BUILD A STARTING XI BY ALTERNATING BETWEEN BLACK AND WHITE PLAYERS — NO EXCEPTIONS.

TO RAISE THE STAKES, FORFEITS ARE DISHED OUT TO ANYONE WHO BREAKS THE RULES: PICK TWO OF THE SAME COLOUR IN A ROW? FORFEIT. CHOOSE SOMEONE ALREADY DRAFTED? FORFEIT. IT’S AS RUTHLESS AS IT IS RIDICULOUS.

PREPARE FOR END-TO-END CHAOS — AND POSSIBLY THE WORST DRAFT PERFORMANCE IN HISTORY. NO SPOILERS, BUT LET’S JUST SAY SKRIBZ MIGHT WANT TO RETIRE AFTER THIS ONE.

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OTHER THAN A FEW (PRETTY BIG) TRANSFERS SHAKING THINGS UP AND THE FIFA CLUB WORLD CUP KICKING OFF OVER IN THE U.S., IT'S BEEN A BIT QUIET IN THE WORLD OF FOOTBALL. BUT LET’S BE HONEST—WHEN HAS THAT EVER STOPPED US FROM TALKING?

BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT WE DO HERE. WE TALK BALL. WE TALK NONSENSE. WE TALK ABOUT FLORIAN WIRTZ—SPECIFICALLY, HOW MUCH HE MIGHT BE COSTING LIVERPOOL. AND NOT JUST IN POUNDS OR EUROS. NO, NO—WE’RE TAKING IT NEXT LEVEL. WE’RE CONVERTING THAT FEE INTO NIGERIAN NAIRA. WHY? BECAUSE… WHY NOT? IT SOUNDS MORE DRAMATIC. HOW MUCH DOES HE COST IN JAMAICAN DOLLARS? YOU’LL SEE!

OF COURSE, WE’RE NOT STOPPING THERE. WE’RE ALSO ANSWERING A FEW QUESTIONS FROM OUR LOYAL LISTENERS—THE CROWD. SOME OF THOSE QUESTIONS VEER A LITTLE OFF-COURSE.

DISCLAIMER: THIS EPISODE WAS FILMED ON JUNE 16TH.

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THE FIFA CLUB WORLD CUP IS UNDERWAY, AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO DIVE INTO THE ACTION—AND THE TEAMS THAT MAKE THIS TOURNAMENT SPECIAL—THAN WITH A SENSATIONALISED DRAFT?

EXPECT NAMES YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF, WILD PICKS LIKE TKA, AND THE CHAOS OF FORFEITED PLAYERS BECAUSE SOMEONE DIDN’T FOLLOW THE RULES. THIS IS NOT YOUR AVERAGE DRAFT—IT’S ONE YOU WON’T WANT TO MISS.

IT’S ALL ABOUT TEAM BALANCE, AND IF A GOALKEEPER FROM MAMELODI SUNDOWNS CAN BRING THAT BALANCE, THEN SO BE IT.

ONE THING’S FOR SURE: WE KNOW BALL.

DISCLAIMER: THIS DRAFT HAS BEEN SENSATIONALISED.

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FOLLOW THE MANDEM

POET https://www.instagram.com/poetscorneruk
STEVO THE MADMAN https://www.instagram.com/stevothemadman
LIPPY https://www.instagram.com/dondadalippy
SAVAGE DAN https://www.instagram.com/savagedan10
MARGS https://www.instagram.com/margsmt
LOONS https://www.instagram.com/fruitpunch_papi
KG https://www.instagram.com/kgthacomedian
SKITS https://www.instagram.com/skitsybuddha
SKRIBZ https://www.instagram.com/skribzst
JOHN WICK https://www.instagram.com/johnwick_nvb

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THE FIRST MINI TRANSFER WINDOW HAS SLAMMED SHUT — AND IT’S LEFT SOME CLUBS SCRAMBLING.

LIPPY, SAVAGE DAN, POET, LOONS, KG THA COMEDIAN, SKITS, JOHN WICK, AND MENACE BREAK DOWN ALL THE TRANSFER HYPE AND EARLY CHAOS.

MANCHESTER CITY LOOK LOCKED AND LOADED FOR A REBUILD, WITH TIJJANI REIJNDERS, RAYAN CHERKI, AND AÏT-NOURI ALL BUT CONFIRMED FOR NEXT SEASON.

OVER AT UNITED, CUNHA HAS ALREADY ARRIVED TO BOOST THE FRONTLINE, BUT NOW THEY’RE CIRCLING BRYAN MBEUMO AND LEADING THE RACE FOR VIKTOR GYÖKERES.

ARSENAL? QUIET… MAYBE TOO QUIET. WITH COMPLICATIONS SURROUNDING ZUBIMENDI AND ŠEŠKO, WILL THEY REGRET NOT ACTING SOONER?

MEANWHILE, CHELSEA — SURPRISE SURPRISE — ARE STILL STACKING PLAYERS AND TURNING UP THE HEAT IN THEIR SEARCH FOR THE RIGHT GOALKEEPER… THEY’VE ALSO MADE A BID FOR ANOTHER ATTACKER WHO LEARNT HIS TRADE IN MANCHESTER, MOVED TO DORTMUND—AND COULD NOW BE HEADED TO WEST LONDON. SOUND FAMILIAR? 

AND REMEMBER — THE REAL SUMMER TRANSFER WINDOW OPENS IN JUST 5 DAYS. THAT’S WHEN THINGS GET SERIOUS.

DISCLAIMER: THIS VIDEO WAS FILMED 9TH JUNE 2025

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THE SEASON JUST GONE HAD 113 FEWER GOALS THAN THE LAST. THE PGMOL HAD A STINKER, AND CERTAIN PLAYERS WERE PUNISHED SIMPLY FOR EXPRESSING THEMSELVES—FOR CELEBRATING.

LOONS CLAIMS THE LEAGUE WAS MORE COMPETITIVE THAN EVER... OR WAS IT?

IS IT TIME REFEREES WERE HELD ACCOUNTABLE, MIC’D UP, OR EVEN RANKED IN THEIR OWN LEAGUE TABLE?

SHOULD THE SIN BIN BE SERIOUSLY CONSIDERED? 

WOULD IT REDUCE NEEDLESS MISTAKES—OR JUST ADD MORE INCONVENIENCE FOR FANS?

WE LOOK BACK AT THE SEASON AND DECIDE WHAT WE'D LIKE TO SEE INTRODUCED NEXT SEASON... AND WHAT WE’D RATHER LEAVE BEHIND.

FILTHY.

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PSG’S ABSOLUTE BATTERING OF INTER WAS A FITTING END TO A VERY LONG SEASON.

BUT IT DOESN’T END FOR US, AND IT DOESN’T END FOR YOU… THE SHOW MUST GO ON.

THE MINI TRANSFER WINDOW HAS JUST OPENED, SO WE’RE DISCUSSING THE LATEST DEALS—AND POTENTIAL DEALS—COMING TO OR GOING OUT OF YOUR CLUB.

WILL ARSENAL GET THEIR TARGET MAN?
WILL LIVERPOOL GET THEIRS?

IT LOOKS LIKE MARESCA’S CHELSEA ARE ADDING EVEN MORE YOUTH TO THEIR SETUP AND… WHAT THE HELL IS CUNHA THINKING?!

THERE’VE BEEN UPS, AND THERE’VE BEEN SOME SERIOUS DOWNS—BUT WE’VE PREVAILED. 

HERE AT FILTHY FELLAS, WE’RE ALL ABOUT CONSISTENCY…

WE’VE STUCK TO WHAT WE DO BEST—SO WHAT BETTER WAY TO WRAP UP THE 24/25 SEASON THAN WITH THE FILTHY FELLAS END OF SEASON AWARDS?

THANK YOU TO THE CROWD FOR YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT... HERE'S ANOTHER SIGNING. 

DISCLAIMER: THIS VIDEO WAS FILMED 2ND JUNE 2025

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THE PREMIER LEAGUE SEASON IS DONE AND DUSTED—SO IT’S ONLY RIGHT WE COME TOGETHER AND BUILD OUR TEAM OF THE SEASON. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY… AGREE. THIS IS A DEMOCRACY, AFTER ALL. KIND OF.

THE CONCEPT’S SIMPLE: WE SIT DOWN, DEBATE (ARGUE), AND EVENTUALLY SETTLE ON WHO MADE THE BEST XI FROM THE 2024/25 SEASON.

THERE’S NO LIMIT ON HOW MANY PLAYERS CAN COME FROM ONE TEAM. SO IF YOU WANT ELEVEN LIVERPOOL PLAYERS? GO FOR IT. JUST KNOW—YOU’RE TAPPED. AREN’T YOU, LOONS?

MOHAMED SALAH’S A GIVEN, RIGHT?

AND WHAT ABOUT BRYAN MBEUMO? IS THIS WHERE “SPECIAL DISPENSATION” COMES INTO PLAY?

ALL WILL BE REVEALED.
KEEP IT FILTHY.

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THE 2024/25 PREMIER LEAGUE SEASON IS OVER. 

LIVERPOOL ARE CHAMPIONS, ARSENAL HAVE FINISHED SECOND FOR THE THIRD YEAR IN A ROW, AND A RECORD NINE PREMIER LEAGUE TEAMS HAVE QUALIFIED FOR EUROPE.

ONE TEAM THAT DIDN’T MAKE IT? MANCHESTER UNITED. OUCH. THEY RECORDED THEIR WORST SEASON IN PREMIER LEAGUE HISTORY AAAAAND LOST TO SPURS IN THE EUROPA LEAGUE FINAL. 

IT’S TIME MANCHESTER UNITED FANS GOT INTRODUCED TO THE GLASSES OF TRUTH.

THIS WEEK, LIPPY, SAVAGE DAN, STEVO THE MADMAN, JOHN WICK, SKITZ, AND KG THA COMEDIAN TAKE A LOOK BACK AT OUR PRE-SEASON PREDICTIONS AND REVIEW HOW THE 'BIG SIX'—AND MANCHESTER UNITED—ACTUALLY PERFORMED.

HOW FAR OFF WERE WE? 

ALL WILL BE REVEALED IN THIS WEEK’S FILTHY @ FIVE.

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