First Dates & Soulmates: A Romance Podcast

Episode 101 kicks off with a deceptively simple question that nearly broke Threads: does romance require a happily ever after?Nikki and Meg are firmly in the yes camp. HEA or HFN required, or else it’s a love story and it belongs on a different shelf. But the more interesting conversation is about what “happy” actually means now versus what it meant when the Romance Writers of America first put the definition on paper in the 1980s. Spoiler: it has never stopped evolving, and that evolution is doing a lot of fascinating work.They also get into the shelving problem, why mislabelling love stories as romance isn’t just annoying, it’s a trust issue, and close on Nikki’s spicy provocation: is the push to strip the HEA from romance just literary elitism in a trench coat? Meg has a response. It involves Henry Higgins and yelling about 'My Fair Lady.’

Correction: RWA didn't fully collapse, but it nearly did. After the 2019 censure of author Courtney Milan sparked mass resignations and years of criticism over how the org handled race and inclusion, membership fell from roughly 10,000 at its 2019 peak to around 2,000–3,000 by 2024 — an 80% drop in five years, per reporting from NBC News. RWA filed for Chapter 11 that May — not to liquidate, but to restructure roughly $3 million it owed to conference hotels. It is still running.

But the community hasn't forgiven. Trust remains genuinely split — Smart Bitches, Trashy Books captured the core of the skepticism back when the crisis first broke: the problem was never just money, it was whether the foundation itself could be trusted again. Some authors have rebuilt alongside RWA. Others moved their professional community elsewhere for good.

Our Ships:

• Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Playwright by Bailey Seaborn
• The Runaway Duchess by Joanna Lowell
• Hot Axe (Axeford Brothers Book 2) by May Archer

Episode 100 is here. Nikki and Meg are popping every metaphorical champagne bottle and celebrating the way all great romance milestones should be celebrated : with live reactions, hot takes, and a deep dive into the most iconic romance moments ever put on screen.

To mark the occasion, Nikki pulled together a set of YouTube clip compilations covering the top rewatched romance movie scenes, the greatest TV couples of the 2010s, and the best love confessions in pop culture.

Meg, in full form, has not seen most of them.

They cover everything from the Princess Bride (perfect) to Grease (iconic but those are not high schoolers) to the When Harry Met Sally love confession (the one).

There are strong opinions about who belongs on the list and who absolutely does not — 500 Days of Summer, we’re looking at you.

Along the way, Nikki and Meg also talk about why romance matters, why women are allowed to enjoy it loudly, and why a hundred episodes in, neither of them is done.

Our Ships:

* Parallel by L. O’Rourke: https://amzn.to/3NukfI7

* Under the Surface by N.R. Walker: https://amzn.to/40Zttz3

Videos We Watched:

Top 20 Most Rewatched Scenes in Romance Movies

Best Confessions of Love

Top 10 Greatest TV Couples of the Decade

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Got a Little Extra Money to Spend?

Buy our official merch on TeePublic: http://tee.pub/lic/6TtnpmFagAk

Get Meg’s Latest Book: https://amzn.to/4altuTv

Shop our affiliate book recs on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/caseboltcreative

Upgrade to a paid tier on Substack

Get full access to First Dates & Soulmates: Romance Podcast at firstdatesandsoulmates.substack.com/subscribe

Nikki has put Meg back in the hot seat as her romance author persona Bailey Seaborn to celebrate the release of “Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Playwright”, the third full-length novel in the All or Nothing universe.

This episode dives into:

* The pandemic romance-novel dreams about Chris Evans-type hometown reunions to a massive dual-timeline story that became the emotional center of the entire series

* Characters who are both SO right and SO wrong at the same time

* Why Meg refuses to let characters escape hard decisions with convenient cheating plots

* Chaos gremlin side characters doing their absolute best work

* Writing a dual-timeline, dual-POV story without losing your mind

The result is a romance about timing, growth, and the idea that once someone changes you, you’re never quite the same again.

Read our short review of Two Wrongs Don't Make a Playwright

If you love second chance romance, chcck out our second chance romance book recommendations. And if you’re looking for the structural reason that second chance rmoances work, read our Second Chance Blueprint (because we're us, so of course we have a framework!).

Buy Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Playwright by Bailey Seaborn: https://amzn.to/4cOlNH5

Join the Bailey Seaborn mailing list here: https://baileyseaborn.com/

Follow Bailey on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/baileyseabornauthor/

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Got a Little Extra Money to Spend?

Buy our official merch on TeePublic: http://tee.pub/lic/6TtnpmFagAk

Get Meg’s Latest Book: https://amzn.to/4altuTv

Shop our affiliate book recs on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/caseboltcreative

Upgrade to a paid tier on Substack

Get full access to First Dates & Soulmates: Romance Podcast at firstdatesandsoulmates.substack.com/subscribe

Meg & Nikki celebrate Second Chance Month with a rewatch of Sweet Home Alabama, starring Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, and Patrick Dempsey.

This episode breaks down:

* Hidden identities and the “reinvent yourself in Manhattan” fantasy

* Small-town roots vs. big-city ambition

* The ethics of not mentioning you’re still married

* Whether the reunion is romantic… or just nostalgia with humidity

The real debate: is this a sweeping second chance romance or a woman shrinking herself back into an old version to make everyone comfortable?

Ships:

* Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Playwright by Bailey Seaborn: https://amzn.to/4cP6hdX

* Blue Balling the Demon by Callie Colby: https://amzn.to/3P7WF4h

* Wings & Whispers series by Calli Colby: https://amzn.to/41516zk

If you love second chance romance, chcck out our second chance romance book recommendations. And if you’re looking for the structural reason that Sweet Home Alabama didn’t stick the landing, read our Second Chance Blueprint (spoiler: It’s missing stages 6-7, Choosing and Proof)

This week on the show Meg & Nikki deep dive into second chance romance trope with a deep dive: the emotionally volatile, nostalgia-soaked, “but what if this time?” category of love stories.

This is not just “they loved each other once.” This is:

* Why shared history creates instant emotional gravity

* The “we’ve already suffered” bonding mechanism

* The rupture: it cannot be something dumb like “miscommunication and vibes”

* Time apart: did they grow, or did they just get hotter and richer?

* What proof of change actually looks like

Because sometimes it’s romantic.

And sometimes it’s just texting your ex in 4K.

This episode developed the Second Chance Blueprint — First Dates & Soulmates' framework for second chance romance and the seven elements that have to be present for a reunion to earn itself.

Get our full list of contemporary, sports, historical, and queer second chance romance book recommendations.

Our favorite second chance novels:

• Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Playwright, Bailey Seaborn
• Again the Magic, Lisa Kleypas
• Love & Other Words, Christina Lauren
• The Ex Vows, Jessica Joyce
• Repeat, Kylie Scott
• Hot for Slayer, Aly Hazelwood
• Before I Let Go, Kennedy Ryan

Movies discussed:

• The Notebook
• The Vow
• What’s Your Number?

Also discussed (not second chance): Saddle to Sunup, Emmy Sanders

Ships:

• Faking It and Crashing Together by AJ Claremont
• Doppelbanger by WH Lockwood

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Meg and Nikki are back in the ton to close out Bridgerton Season 4 with Part 2 : the grief arc, the jail that wasn’t dramatic enough, the cottage proposal, and women choosing themselves.

This episode breaks down:

* The longing and insane chemistry between characters

* The jail scene we deserved vs. the legal logistics we got

* Francesca’s grief arc and why Episode 7 quietly owns the season

* How this story’s Gossip Girl (aka Lady W) is setting up future intrigue

Overall: they stuck the landing. But we have thoughts.

Media we mentioned:

* An Offer From a Gentleman (Benedict & Sophie): https://amzn.to/4bkZNCl

* When He Was Wicked (Francesca & Michael): https://amzn.to/4r1yn9b

* To Sir Philip, With Love (Eloise & Philip): https://amzn.to/4r6IXMk

* On the Way to the Wedding (Gregory & Lucinda): https://amzn.to/46Fklmp

Our Ships this week:

* Meg: Julia Quinn’s Curated Romance Book Box Kickstarter: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/juliaquinn/jq-editions-julia-quinns-curated-romance-book-box?ref=3ncuzi

* Nikki: The Regressor King by AJ Sherwood: https://amzn.to/4skDb

Today Meg & Nikki are talking about a trilogy that made their top Tingly Awards this year: Atrous by NR Walker (Code Red, Code Blue, Code Word).

This episode explores:

* The pressure of fame on romantic relationships

* The difference between rock band chaos and boy band polish

* What happens when talent outpaces emotional maturity

* The original band dynamic (talent? yes. therapy? no.)

* How public performance magnifies private wounds

Atrous becomes a case study in musician-based romance ecosystems. Who feels safe? Who feels replaceable? Who gets to be messy? Who gets punished for it?

Rock Star Romance recommendations w/ affiliate links:

• Atrous Trilogy by NR Walker: https://amzn.to/4kOGTHd• Stage Dive Series by Kylie Scott: https://amzn.to/3ZBxklh• VIP Series by Kristen Callahan: https://amzn.to/4aTlycf• Louder Than Love by Jessica Topper: https://amzn.to/4aTlycf• Sinners on Tour by Olivia Cunning: https://amzn.to/4amlykY

Want more rock star romance? Check out episode 55 with author Jessica Topper:

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Download your copy of the 2025 book bingo card at https://bit.ly/fdsmbingo

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Got a Little Extra Money to Spend?

Buy our official merch on TeePublic: http://tee.pub/lic/6TtnpmFagAk

Get Meg’s Latest Book: All Twerk No Play: https://amzn.to/3Ee2O9Z

Shop our affiliate book recs on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/caseboltcreative

Upgrade to a paid tier on Substack

It’s Nikki’s birthday pick, and we’re talking reality TV romance: where NDAs are tighter than the contracts, producers are messier than the contestants, and love has to survive the edit.

This episode breaks down:

* Why reality TV is the perfect romance framework: fake dating, forced proximity, public vs private selves, producer interference, villain edits, and love as performance

* How romance stories let love win despite the system (something reality TV almost never manages in real life)

* Why love hitting despite the format is so satisfying

* Grand gestures that actually make sense

Reality TV romance novels mentioned:

* The Boyfriend Game by Stella Starling: https://amzn.to/3Mlm75j

* Treble Maker by Annabeth Albert: https://amzn.to/4rAKZ8F

* Winner Bakes All series by Alexis Hall: https://amzn.to/4aPUvys

* Facing Reality by Sienna Atwell: https://amzn.to/464w79H

* The True Love Experiment by Christina Lauren: https://amzn.to/3MxvtLb

* Cupid Calling by Viano Oniomoh: https://amzn.to/4riWrFG

* If the Shoe Fits by Julie Murphy: https://amzn.to/4rhSrFv

* The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun: https://amzn.to/3OdGIsR

We are shipping:

* Meg: In a Rush by Kate Canterbary: https://amzn.to/40bk32U

* Nikki: This Poison Heart by Kalynn Bayron: https://amzn.to/4qzYAeY

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Download your copy of the 2025 book bingo card at https://bit.ly/fdsmbingo

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Got a Little Extra Money to Spend?

Buy our official merch on TeePublic: http://tee.pub/lic/6TtnpmFagAk

Get Meg’s Latest Book: All Twerk No Play: https://amzn.to/3Ee2O9Z

Shop our affiliate book recs on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/caseboltcreative

Upgrade to a paid tier on Substack

This week, Nikki and Meg finally dive into Morning Glory Milking Farm: the monster romance that launched a thousand awkward recommendations and at least one “wait… is this actually good?” group chat spiral.

We talk:

• Monster anatomy (briefly), consent (extensively), capitalism (of course), and why this book works far better than it has any right to.
• From Minotaur milking logistics to Violet’s deeply relatable millennial “I just need a job that pays rent” energy
• Monster romance as labor commentary (yes, really)

Plus: capitalism discourse, bodily autonomy, and why Minotaurs might be better boyfriends than most humans.

Read our full Morning Glory Milking Farm book review,

This week’s ships:

NikkI: Wet by Cambria Hebert

Meg: Mercy by Sara Cate

This episode, along with episode 75: Monster Romance & Lily Mayne’s Soul Eater, developed the Monster Romance Framework — First Dates & Soulmates' analytical guide to what monster romance is actually doing, built around the argument that the romance is the process of replacing inherited fear with direct observation.

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

The first four episodes of Bridgerton Season 4 are here and they might be the strongest opening since Season 1.

SO MANY SPOILERS.

Nikki and Meg break down:

* Benedict Bridgerton as a flawed hero (and why the internet needs to relax)

* Upstairs vs. downstairs storytelling (maids, money, power, respect)

* The Lady Whistledown problem now that everyone knows who she is

* Violet Bridgerton’s late-in-life desire arc (icon behaviour)

* Lady Danbury, the Queen, and choosing your own damn shoes

And be sure to come back in March for part 2 of season 4 :)

How You Can Support The Show

Discover your romance trope and get a custom play list at https://firstdatesandsoulmates.com/quiz/

Follow Us On Social:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/firstdatesandsoulmates/

TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@firstdatesandsoulmates

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@FirstDatesSoulmates

Download your copy of the 2025 book bingo card at https://bit.ly/fdsmbingo

Email us at [email protected]

Share the show with a friend or loved one!

Got a Little Extra Money to Spend?

Buy our official merch on TeePublic: http://tee.pub/lic/6TtnpmFagAk

Get Meg’s Latest Book: All Twerk No Play: https://amzn.to/3Ee2O9Z

Shop our affiliate book recs on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/caseboltcreative

Upgrade to a paid tier on Substack