Where is your focus? If you’re listening to this podcast, I can pretty much guarantee it’s not on you. We spend a crazy amount of time focusing on other people in order to get what we need—usually validation that we’re ok. As kids, many of us were told to stop feeling a certain way; that it was selfish. So we grew up believing our feelings were wrong or unjustified. Naturally, we stopped trusting them. Since then we’ve been trying to figure out what’s wrong with us, so we look to others for reassurance we’re ok. If they don’t give it to us, our world turns upside down. We feel completely out of control and anxiety takes over.

But how can we give another fallible human that power over us? Why are they the benchmark? What we don’t realize is people have their OWN crap, so the approval we’re seeking is based on another flawed person’s opinion. It doesn’t mean anything. When we try so hard to get people to like us in order to feel ok, it’s actually more selfish than focusing on ourselves. When we want them to act the way WE want them to, we’re not allowing life to be life. It’s so much freer to let people be who they are and turn the focus back on ourselves. What are you avoiding? Connect with yourself. Feel your feelings. It’s overwhelming, but it will set you free.