Freedom from Attachment

Someone makes an off-handed remark and you bristle. Or they criticize you and you go into full-blown defensive mode before you dissolve into a million pieces. Why does this happen? Why are you so sensitive to some things while others slide off your back? You react when there is some truth in what was said; a truth you don’t want to admit to yourself, let alone have it pointed out by another person. When they call it out you become awash with shame. Shame is a VERY uncomfortable emotion to deal with so instead of feeling it, you deflect, attack, avoid or blame.

Maybe your friend says you can’t be alone, which is why you’re always jumping from one bad relationship to the next. If that’s not true, there would be no reaction. Nothing would be triggered inside of you. But if you strike back and/or want to crawl into a hole… that’s a sign. Shame is talking and it’s time to listen. In this week’s podcast we’re talking about how to deal with criticism and shame. It’s hard to see the unsavory or unlikeable parts of yourself, but acknowledging those parts is the road to self-love, self-acceptance and emotional freedom. When you own your actions and feel the shame, you open the door to healing. No one likes criticism, but it can be an incredibly powerful tool for growth.

WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget)

Put on your cape and open yourself to all sorts of criticism. Own what’s yours and let it flow through you. Remember you have your magic cape!

Do you choose love, or are you waiting to be chosen? Maybe you believe love has forgotten about you, or it’s reserved for other, more “deserving” people. Instead of opening yourself up to it, you ruminate on what you don’t have, believing you’re being punished by some mysterious force. That, my friends, is playing the love victim. Love is actually a choice, but to get there, you have to see how your actions are working against you to create what you don’t want.

Shame around being single, negative beliefs that say you’re not good enough and fear of abandonment all contribute to feeling like love isn’t available to you. And when that’s what you believe, you’ll pick partners who support that belief; it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. In this week’s podcast I’ll challenge you to look at your situation as an observer to zero in on what you’re choosing to create. Yes, CHOOSING. Having love starts with owning your choices and deciding to make new ones. If everything is a choice, why not choose love?

You consider yourself a strong person. When a challenge presents itself, you tackle it head-on. People come to you for answers because you always seem to have them. You pick others up when they fall. You’re reliable and trustworthy. But to be that pillar of strength, you push your emotions aside because you can’t be someone else’s hero if they see a crack in your armor. And therein lies the problem.

We have been brought up to believe that giving is strong and receiving is weak. But that’s backwards. Asking for help and being able to receive takes courage. Allowing others to see you as human is what strong people do. In this week’s episode I’ll challenge you to explore why being “strong” is important to you, and where you struggle to receive. Because you can’t give or receive love freely if you’re emotionally shut down. When you open your heart to others and allow them to see your vulnerability, you radiate strength.

WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget)

The hole in your suit of armor is inside of you. Allow it to exist without being strong so you connect with yourself and others.

How much time do you spend complaining about problems and/or fixing them? You finally join the country club, but you can never get the tee-time you want, the food is bland and all the members are annoying. Or you criticize your co-worker for doing a project “wrong,” then take it over and do it yourself because no one can measure up to you. This, my friends, is classic avoidance. When your focus is on problems outside of you, it lets you off the hook to address what’s happening INSIDE of you.

When you don’t trust life or other people, you work harder to control things, including solving problems that don’t exist. And when you criticize everything under the sun, you are resistant to change and growth. These are signs of unhappiness. In this week’s episode we’ll look at your expectations of others and why they exist. You will also be challenged to stop solving problems for one day to see what happens when you allow life to unfold without judgment or control. Problems are everywhere, but they don’t have to become your problems. Instead of focusing on them, you can learn to trust that things will work out without your interference.

WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget)

You can be a martyr or problem-solver, but neither will open you up to happiness.

Join Tracy as she dives into an inspiring conversation with Katia Stern, a transformational speaker and bestselling author who redefines what it means to live a bold, audacious life. Together, they explore how to let go of societal expectations, embrace your true self, and live a life that makes you say, "Wow!" Whether you're looking to make a big life change or simply want to feel more empowered in your everyday decisions, this episode offers the tools and mindset shifts you need.

Key Takeaways:

* Embrace audacity: Learn how to make bold decisions that can lead to life-changing experiences.

* Redefine failure: See every experience as a lesson and redefine what success looks like for you.

* Prioritize self-love: Understand the importance of setting boundaries and focusing on your own growth.

* Empower your presence: Discover how to show up confidently and powerfully in all areas of your life.

People always want to know if they should leave their job or their relationship or whatever situation they are unhappy with. Shouldn’t they cut their losses? Isn’t it better to chase the next bright shiny object? The problem is, when people DO make that change, they tend to repeat the same pattern in their next job or next relationship, and they become increasingly frustrated that nothing ever changes. So what’s the solution? Stay longer than is comfortable.

Your inability to stick with situations or relationships long enough to learn from them is what keeps you stuck. Without standing still and being present, you just perpetuate the pattern of cutting bait too soon, chasing what’s next, then convincing yourself this is just who you are. It’s a false story. In this week’s episode I challenge you to stay just a little bit longer than you want to. Because getting excited about the next possibility will eventually wear off and you’ll be in this same spot once again. When you’re curious about why you’re here and why staying is so uncomfortable, you get to some deeper truths that open the window to change.

WISDOM NUGGET (#wisdomnugget)

Give up the bright shiny object to stay with the old socks until you are deeply moved to grow by knowing what attracted you to the old socks in the first place.

Are you feeling unfulfilled or stuck after a major life change? Join Tracy as she speaks with fashion designer and entrepreneur Tara Marino, where their conversation will reignite your passion and help you rediscover your wholeness.

In this episode, Tara shares how embracing all aspects of her identity transformed her pain into purpose. You'll learn how to shift your mindset, align with your deepest desires, and live more authentically by shedding societal expectations. Tune in for insights and inspiration to overcome adversity and fully embrace who you are.

Here's what you'll take away from this episode:

* How to embrace your multidimensionality instead of compartmentalizing yourself

* Tara's mindset shift for transforming pain into profound growth and purpose

* Insights on aligning your actions with your deepest desires, even when they don't make "logical" sense

* The freedom of shedding societal expectations to live more authentically

"Stop asking why and start asking how. How are you going to allow this experience to affect the rest of your life?" – Tara Marino

Think about something in your life that you continually complain about. Maybe it’s a partner who won’t commit, or your inability to get past a first date. Do you feel defeated and/or concerned you can’t have what you want? As with many things, it boils down to a lack of self-worth. If you believed in yourself, you wouldn’t worry so much. By contrast, look at the things you don’t sweat. Maybe it’s constructive feedback at work or squabbles with a family member that happen over and over, but don’t get you down. Whatever it is, if it’s something you do well or aren’t afraid of losing, you’re usually not concerned about it. The areas where you DO get wrapped up in concern are what you want to pay attention to.

In this podcast we’ll look at what you get hung up on, believing it’s elusive, and why. Awareness will help you stop the behavioral patterns that can lead to self-sabotage. Because you ARE capable of handing life, even when it doesn’t go the way you want.

Ever feel like you're just going through the motions, disconnected from your true purpose? Join Tracy, as she speaks with Chris Cirak, an author, speaker, and meditator with over 25 years of experience in design, tech, business, and entrepreneurship.

Chris vulnerably shares his journey from a life of external success to a profound spiritual awakening that shattered everything he knew. You'll hear how he courageously navigated the "dark night of the soul" to emerge as a guide helping others react less and thrive more.

With an eclectic background spanning design, psychology, and tech, Chris masterfully translates ancient wisdom into accessible experiences. His unique perspective reminds us that our challenges can become the very gifts we have to offer the world.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

*Practical tips for bringing mindfulness into your daily routines through attention to detail

*Insights on embracing your authentic voice and connecting with your true calling

*A glimpse into Chris's transformative retreats cultivating inner shifts through conscious living

Do you say to yourself (or others) that you are the prize, and your partner is lucky to have you? And do you actually believe it, or is it just false bravado? Maybe you overcompensate for your true feelings that you don’t measure up by working hard to “be the prize.” Or you go the other direction and withdraw because deep down you not only believe you’re NOT the prize… you feel completely worthless. Whichever road you take, you’re causing drama and sabotaging your relationships.

In this week’s podcast we explore what’s behind this diminished sense of value and how to build yourself up so you feel worthy and deserving of love. It starts with unraveling your shame and self-judgment, then feeling it instead of minimizing it (yep, you’ve gotta there). I’ll walk you through a few steps to get you started.

Shame is a tough emotion to allow, but you are more resilient than you think. And it’s worth this deep work because once you start believing you really are a gem, you’ll attract someone who believes it to.

Here are just a few key insights you'll gain:

* How to stop creating unnecessary drama and chaos in your life

* Techniques for treating yourself with kindness and self-compassion

* Steps to take empowered actions that align with your self-worth

* Ways to overcome the fears holding you back from living as your best self