The problem child. The difficult one. Black sheep. The one who just couldn't get it right.

It’s really not your story, even if you feel it deep inside.

I thought it was my story for years. Being the scapegoat in your family means you have all sorts of peculiar labels that don’t belong to you. Like a pair of ill-fitting shoes, you made it work as you were hobbling along.

Let’s talk about how perceptive we are as scapegoats and the spiritual path it takes you on. Cosmic Intelligence doesn’t grow without the contrast of being in survival mode. You, like myself, know the truth, so listen in to hear what may resonate with you.

Take the Cosmic Frequency Quiz at TracyCrossley.com — Survivor, Judge, Seeker, Dweller, or Oracle. It's free.

Tune in to learn more.

I bet you’re self-aware if you are reading this; you’re probably highly sensitive too and perceptive. Your awareness developed from observing the narcissistic parent in your life.

Growing up with a personality-disordered parent doesn't just leave marks, it truly is a “normalized” operating system; the guilt, the shame, the belief that their chaos was somehow yours to fix.

In having been on a spiritual journey of self discovery, and at one point wanting to stop anxiety, and other out of control feelings in Tracy’s life, this was one of the harder points of pain to get to the bottom of…..

It was reflected in relationships, socially and professionally. The conditioning that made everything difficult when you believe you deserve nothing.

Join Tracy as she shares a story of how the lunacy continues through a nutty story.

Learn how her perspective has completely changed from feeling the familiar pull of a painful dynamic along with the blame for things that never belonged to her and into the present with the cosmic value of what she learned.

Just one story for today.

Tune in to learn more.

Being stuck in survival mode is to be a human being. Survival starts at birth, you have needs to be fulfilled or you won’t survive.

Survival equals attachment.

A cosmic connection utilizing spiritual intelligence has absolutely NOTHING to do with survival. Accessing it and moving into love and nonattachment is a beautiful commitment to thriving.

Holding on to what you fear losing, will keep you in survival and therefore anxious, numb or depressed. The spiritual connection is always available, yet humans do the same shit, different day or year. And we haven't evolved internally from survival mode.

The attachment you feel to people, money, outcomes; it's not love. Took me years to move from understanding what love is not, to actually inhabiting the space of nonattachment.

Tune in to learn more.

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Take the Cosmic Frequency Quiz and discover your archetype — Survivor, Judge, Seeker, Dweller, or Oracle. It's a mirror, not a test. And what it shows you might be the thing that changes the impossible to possible.

→ Take the quiz at https://uncomplicatedstore.com/pages/cosmic-archetype <-

What is “the thing” you are waiting for that you may not think you’re waiting for?

I never thought that survival was such an overarching theme to my daily life. All that “had to” or “necessary,” was just an outpouring of survival.

Life is f-ing short, if you’re like me you may not realize the amount of survival you’ve invested in rather than the good stuff.

And doing the same shit, different day? That's not living. That's just waiting.

Tune in if today seems like you’ve been waiting forever for “the thing!”

Are you waiting for your life to be perfect before you let yourself enjoy it? Waiting for the relationship to work out, the job to come through, the problems to resolve?

Bullshit. You're wasting your life.

Nobody is perfectly happy all the time. You're going to have anger, sadness, exhaustion, and happiness all mixed together. That's being human.

Your circumstances might suck. Your roof might be caving in. Have fun anyway. Stop making someone else responsible for your joy.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why mixed emotions don't stop fun

* How attachment to perfect circumstances strangulates your life

* The power of "this moment" vs overpromising forever

* Breaking patterns by inserting different movements

"Life is short. I don't give a shit if you're attached to somebody and you allow that to define your life—you still want to be fully present emotionally, physically, mentally for fun."

You think it's the person. The weight. The job. The relationship status.

You think if you just solve that one thing, you'll finally feel okay inside. But here's what's actually happening: you're using that external problem to avoid the deeper feelings you don't want to touch.

If you wait for everything to be okay before you have fun, you're going to be waiting till the 12th of never.

Give yourself a fucking break. Start changing what you can actually change.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why solving external problems won't fix your insides

* How to change your energy and relationship to situations

* Escaping your feelings vs. connecting to them

* Why fun feels dangerous

* A simple tool to get back in your body

"It's safer to feel like shit than it is to feel great." ~ Tracy Crossley

Tracy calls you out on your bullshit–the "I don't care what people think" persona you keep alive while secretly waiting for someone to make it safe before you take a risk.

She breaks down how avoidants stay stuck in a comfortable box, never developing real self-worth, always waiting for something to rescue them. A relationship, money, the universe. Something.

Here's the truth: nothing is coming to rescue you from you.

Tracy shares how even years into this work, she had to learn that her husband showing up didn't mean he'd clean up her shit. She still had to be in charge of herself.

The way out? Tiny, emotionally risky actions where you're not attached to approval or disapproval.

"I cannot tell you how many years, even in doing this work, that I still felt there would be something, some payoff, something somewhere rescuing me from me." ~ Tracy Crossley

Something new for you!

Check this out–Tracy shares part of her experience and view on romantic relationships.

Right out of her new book, Tracy uses clay to demonstrate an activity from her new book, Unboxed: Four Doors to Abundance.

She walks through the difference between the fantasy relationship in your head and what real love actually requires—spoiler: it's messier, harder, and way more fun than you think.

"Self-help is really about helping yourself to have a good f-ing time." ~ Tracy Crossley

After 800+ episodes diving deep into attachment theory, Tracy's making a shift. Freedom from Attachment is becoming UNcomplicated.

Why? Even after all that work, she was still treating herself like “what’s wrong?” The age-old question lingering from birth… what needs fixing?

Ya know when things are happening that suck or it seems difficult to have what you want—some of us go to “what am I doing wrong?” Or “Is it just me, and if so how do I change it so I am happy?”

You can do all the work and still be waiting to arrive at some magical place where you're finally "happy." That place doesn't exist. You don’t arrive to happy, you decide to be happy even when your life ain’t all that!

The whole wrong thing–most anxious avoidant people don’t realize, you're an extremist. Black or white–right or wrong. No gray. And that's exhausting as f***.

Anywho–even if you’re attached or you are not where you want to be—can’t things be okay now? Instead of finding the solution, it’s to allow things inside to move, shift and change without it being a lifelong pursuit. “If only I hadn’t said this or done that.”

Let’s get Uncomplicated. It all came in a dream, simplicity is a choice and it’s how I want to live. How about you?

So–the UNcomplicated series will be talking about how to get UNboxed. We are in a box, and I am not going to magically change you in a weary world. I’m supplying fun while growing. Yeah–so listen in and have some fun!

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why treating yourself as a science project keeps you stuck

* "Not your fault" vs. "your responsibility"

* Living in the gray instead of extremes

* Having fun even when life totally sucks

"It's not your fault, but it is your responsibility. Nobody can fix it for you. Nobody." ~ Tracy Crossley

You think you're being nice. Accommodating. A good partner.

But here's the truth: people-pleasing is killing your relationship. Every time you don't speak up because you're afraid of conflict, you're building distance. Every time you sacrifice and keep a mental scorecard, you're choosing resentment over love.

Distance is not love.

In this episode, Tracy gets raw about what really blocks intimacy—and it's not your partner's annoying habits. It's your refusal to own your feelings, speak your truth, and stop expecting the other person to make everything perfect. Using a real example from her own marriage (spoiler: it's about morning routines and walking the dogs), Tracy breaks down why speaking up isn't about changing your partner—it's about valuing yourself.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why people-pleasing is manipulation, not love

* How to speak your truth without expecting your partner to change

* The difference between accommodation and sacrifice

* Why you need to stop punishing yourself (and your partner)

* How to accept that you can disagree and still be together

"If you expect the other person to take care of you emotionally, you're going to be [upset] all the time. I don't feel like living that way." ~ Tracy Crossley