Are you waiting for your life to be perfect before you let yourself enjoy it? Waiting for the relationship to work out, the job to come through, the problems to resolve?

Bullshit. You're wasting your life.

Nobody is perfectly happy all the time. You're going to have anger, sadness, exhaustion, and happiness all mixed together. That's being human.

Your circumstances might suck. Your roof might be caving in. Have fun anyway. Stop making someone else responsible for your joy.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why mixed emotions don't stop fun

* How attachment to perfect circumstances strangulates your life

* The power of "this moment" vs overpromising forever

* Breaking patterns by inserting different movements

"Life is short. I don't give a shit if you're attached to somebody and you allow that to define your life—you still want to be fully present emotionally, physically, mentally for fun."

You think it's the person. The weight. The job. The relationship status.

You think if you just solve that one thing, you'll finally feel okay inside. But here's what's actually happening: you're using that external problem to avoid the deeper feelings you don't want to touch.

If you wait for everything to be okay before you have fun, you're going to be waiting till the 12th of never.

Give yourself a fucking break. Start changing what you can actually change.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why solving external problems won't fix your insides

* How to change your energy and relationship to situations

* Escaping your feelings vs. connecting to them

* Why fun feels dangerous

* A simple tool to get back in your body

"It's safer to feel like shit than it is to feel great." ~ Tracy Crossley

Tracy calls you out on your bullshit–the "I don't care what people think" persona you keep alive while secretly waiting for someone to make it safe before you take a risk.

She breaks down how avoidants stay stuck in a comfortable box, never developing real self-worth, always waiting for something to rescue them. A relationship, money, the universe. Something.

Here's the truth: nothing is coming to rescue you from you.

Tracy shares how even years into this work, she had to learn that her husband showing up didn't mean he'd clean up her shit. She still had to be in charge of herself.

The way out? Tiny, emotionally risky actions where you're not attached to approval or disapproval.

"I cannot tell you how many years, even in doing this work, that I still felt there would be something, some payoff, something somewhere rescuing me from me." ~ Tracy Crossley

Something new for you!

Check this out–Tracy shares part of her experience and view on romantic relationships.

Right out of her new book, Tracy uses clay to demonstrate an activity from her new book, Unboxed: Four Doors to Abundance.

She walks through the difference between the fantasy relationship in your head and what real love actually requires—spoiler: it's messier, harder, and way more fun than you think.

"Self-help is really about helping yourself to have a good f-ing time." ~ Tracy Crossley

After 800+ episodes diving deep into attachment theory, Tracy's making a shift. Freedom from Attachment is becoming UNcomplicated.

Why? Even after all that work, she was still treating herself like “what’s wrong?” The age-old question lingering from birth… what needs fixing?

Ya know when things are happening that suck or it seems difficult to have what you want—some of us go to “what am I doing wrong?” Or “Is it just me, and if so how do I change it so I am happy?”

You can do all the work and still be waiting to arrive at some magical place where you're finally "happy." That place doesn't exist. You don’t arrive to happy, you decide to be happy even when your life ain’t all that!

The whole wrong thing–most anxious avoidant people don’t realize, you're an extremist. Black or white–right or wrong. No gray. And that's exhausting as f***.

Anywho–even if you’re attached or you are not where you want to be—can’t things be okay now? Instead of finding the solution, it’s to allow things inside to move, shift and change without it being a lifelong pursuit. “If only I hadn’t said this or done that.”

Let’s get Uncomplicated. It all came in a dream, simplicity is a choice and it’s how I want to live. How about you?

So–the UNcomplicated series will be talking about how to get UNboxed. We are in a box, and I am not going to magically change you in a weary world. I’m supplying fun while growing. Yeah–so listen in and have some fun!

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why treating yourself as a science project keeps you stuck

* "Not your fault" vs. "your responsibility"

* Living in the gray instead of extremes

* Having fun even when life totally sucks

"It's not your fault, but it is your responsibility. Nobody can fix it for you. Nobody." ~ Tracy Crossley

You think you're being nice. Accommodating. A good partner.

But here's the truth: people-pleasing is killing your relationship. Every time you don't speak up because you're afraid of conflict, you're building distance. Every time you sacrifice and keep a mental scorecard, you're choosing resentment over love.

Distance is not love.

In this episode, Tracy gets raw about what really blocks intimacy—and it's not your partner's annoying habits. It's your refusal to own your feelings, speak your truth, and stop expecting the other person to make everything perfect. Using a real example from her own marriage (spoiler: it's about morning routines and walking the dogs), Tracy breaks down why speaking up isn't about changing your partner—it's about valuing yourself.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why people-pleasing is manipulation, not love

* How to speak your truth without expecting your partner to change

* The difference between accommodation and sacrifice

* Why you need to stop punishing yourself (and your partner)

* How to accept that you can disagree and still be together

"If you expect the other person to take care of you emotionally, you're going to be [upset] all the time. I don't feel like living that way." ~ Tracy Crossley

Are you waiting for someone to change? Expecting a relationship to finally fill that emptiness inside?

You're blocking love. And you don't even know it.

Most of us grew up without a manual on how to actually build a relationship. We watched dysfunction. We learned to attach instead of love. We created expectations that keep us stuck.

And here's the kicker: nothing outside of you will ever fill you up.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why your childhood conditioning blocks your ability to love as an adult

* How expectations and entitlement destroy intimacy

* The difference between living in reality versus fantasy about relationships

* Why perfection is just another way of avoiding yourself

* Her own mother as a mirror for what blocking love looks like

* How to stop manipulating situations to get what you want

* The four key steps to opening yourself to real love

"Expectations block love. Every sense of entitlement you have blocks love." ~ Tracy Crossley

This is part one of two. If you keep ending up in the same relationship patterns and can't figure out why—this is your wake-up call.

Does it feel like you're constantly striving to be enough but never quite reaching that point? Maybe you've been told that the key to feeling worthy is to keep achieving more and more, but deep down, you still struggle with feelings of inadequacy. The pain of not feeling like you're good enough can impact every aspect of your life, from relationships to work and your overall well-being. If you're tired of constantly chasing validation and want to experience greater self-acceptance and inner peace, then keep listening.

In this episode, you will be able to:

* Embrace self-acceptance and inner peace for a more fulfilling life.

* Explore the impact of not feeling enough and unlock your true potential.

* Begin your journey towards self-love and find inner contentment.

* Address limiting beliefs for personal transformation and growth.

* Discover the importance of emotional exploration and awareness for a more balanced life.

"You're here to take up space, meaning to be you, to be with who you are right now in this moment. Why? Because you're opening your future up to be amazing then, because that is how magic happens." ~ Tracy Crossley

Think attachment is about love? It's not. It's about greed, power, and control. Whether you're hoarding love, money, or status—it all comes from the same place: feeling empty inside and thinking that getting the thing will finally make you whole.

We excuse behavior in others when we think it benefits us. We make our lives complicated with our own bureaucracy—rules and patterns that keep us stuck on a merry-go-round of grasping for control we never had.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why attachment is really about greed and scarcity, not love

* How hoarding (love, money, status) comes from feeling hollow

* The difference between attachment and actual love

* Living from the inside out instead of filling yourself from the outside in

* Taking emotional risks instead of grasping for control

"We excuse the behavior in others when we think it somehow benefits us." ~ Tracy Crossley

You know what we all do? We look at people through the filter of what we want them to be. Your parents. Your kids. Your partner. Even yourself.

We're so busy projecting our expectations, our fears, our own experiences onto everyone else that we never actually see them. And here's the kicker—they can't see you either. Not really. Not if you can't see yourself.

This isn't about getting people to understand you. It's about getting curious—about them, about yourself—without the agenda of trying to fix or control the outcome.

In this episode, Tracy explores:

* Why learning who someone is matters more than trying to change them

* How your judgment of others is really about your own fear

* The difference between seeing someone and wanting validation from them

* Why shame keeps you separate even when you're in a relationship

* What it means to feel your feelings without running from the anxiety

"We judge others out of fear." ~ Tracy Crossley