In this Q&A episode, I’m answering your most common questions about early dating—particularly through the lens of anxious attachment. If dating feels like a minefield of overthinking, anxiety, and emotional highs and lows, this episode is for you.

We’ll explore:

• Early dating dynamics: Navigating the vulnerability and uncertainty that comes with getting to know someone new.
• Not attaching too quickly: Why it happens for those with anxious attachment and how to pace yourself emotionally.
• Texting anxiety: How to manage the discomfort of waiting for replies and keep yourself grounded.
• Values over chemistry: Why prioritising what truly matters can help you avoid unhealthy patterns and feel more secure.

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In today's episode, we’re diving deep into self-sabotage—those frustrating patterns where we seem to work against our own best interests. Whether it’s procrastination, pushing people away, or avoiding opportunities, self-sabotage can feel like an endless cycle. 

We cover:

• What self-sabotage really is: Understanding how it’s often a misguided attempt to keep us safe.
• Why we get stuck: Exploring the fears, limiting beliefs, and unmet needs that fuel sabotaging behaviour.
• How to shift these patterns: Where to focus your attention to break the cycle and create new, supportive habits.

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In this episode of On Attachment, we’re diving into how to support an avoidant partner in opening up emotionally. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by your partner’s emotional distance or found yourself unsure how to help them feel safe in the relationship, this episode is for you.

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In today's episode, we're talking about the delicate balance between compassion for others, and boundaries for ourselves. For those of us who tend towards empathy and curiosity towards others' inner worlds, it's easy to fixate on the "why" behind their behaviours (particularly behaviours we don't like or understand). And while that is an admirable trait, without clear boundaries it can easily veer into self-abandonment. 

I'll share some thoughts on how to find a balance between compassion and generosity in our interpretation of others' behaviour, while also having clarity and firmness in our self-advocacy and knowing what we can and can't tolerate. 

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In today's episode, we’re diving into what avoidant partner deactivation looks like and how you can respond to this experience in a way that protects your emotional wellbeing and prevents further spiralling and disconnection. 

We’ll explore the subtle ways avoidant partners create distance—whether emotionally, physically, or in their communication—and how these behaviours stem from their attachment patterns rather than a lack of care or love. Importantly, we’ll talk about what you can do in these moments to maintain connection without pressuring your partner or compromising your own self-worth.

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In today's episode, we're talking all about validation — and specifically, why it is so essential for anxiously attached people in building more security within themselves and in their relationships. 

Most anxiously attached people are accustomed to feeling chronically invalidated (in part because they tend to do this to themselves), always wondering if they are too much, too needy, too sensitive, too paranoid, and so on. This can lead to over-reliance on a partner or others external to us to determine whether our experience is real and valid.

Tune in for a discussion on why validation is so important for anxious attachers, and how we can give ourselves this gift to build more security and self-assuredness.

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In today's episode, we're talking all about the abandonment wound — and specifically, five scenarios that might unexpectedly trigger your fears and insecurities around abandonment. When we think about the fear of abandonment, we often imagine scenarios where someone physically leaves us—maybe a breakup or a loved one walking out the door. But the truth is, this fear can manifest in much more subtle and unexpected ways, especially for those of us with anxious attachment patterns.

We'll cover:

• how periods of grief or loss can trigger abandonment fears
• illness and wanting to be cared for
• dealing with unexpected life challenges
• periods of transition or major life changes
• emotional overwhelm and the need for support

Join my new membership, On Attachment Insiders today!

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In this episode, we dive into the growing issue of phone usage and its impact on relationship satisfaction, especially when one partner feels neglected, ignored and frustrated by the other's screen time.

We explore why constant phone use can feel so personal, discuss strategies for approaching the topic constructively, and offer practical ways to set digital boundaries together. If you’re struggling with a partner’s phone habits, this episode will give you tools to foster more connection and understanding.

Join my new membership community, On Attachment Insiders 🌎

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In this episode, we're exploring the common and very human experience of hoping an ex will come back after a break-up, saying they've changed their mind and want to reconcile.

Whether you were left unexpectedly or the break-up was a long time coming, the hope that an ex will realise their mistake and come back can be powerful and all-consuming. I'll share some mindset reframes and tools to relate to your hoping differently, so you can validate yourself while still moving forward in a direction that supports your wellbeing and next chapter.

Additional Resources

• Break-up quiz
• Guided closure meditation
• Higher Love course (save 50% with coupon code PHOENIX)

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website

In this episode, we’re diving into how fearful avoidant attachment (also known as disorganised attachment) plays out in relationships. If you identify with this attachment style, you might notice certain patterns in your relationships that feel confusing or contradictory.

Key points include:

• Feelings of instability in relationships: Many with fearful avoidant attachment feel fine when single, but painful emotions surface in relationships, often leading to blaming their partner.
• Impact of partner's attachment style: A hallmark of fearful avoidant attachment is the shift between anxious and avoidant behaviours, which can vary from one partner to the next depending on the attachment combinations. 
• Idealising vs. villainising partners: There’s a tendency to place partners on a pedestal at times, but then quickly villainise them when triggered or threatened.
• Fear of intimacy vs. longing for connection: Fearful avoidants deeply crave closeness, but a core fear of rejection — often rooted in shame — makes true intimacy feel unsafe. Fear of betrayal and difficulties with trust are also common. 

• Healing Anxious Attachment
• Apply for my 6-month Homecoming Mastermind
• Join On Attachment Insiders, my new membership community

Upcoming Events

• Byron Bay Retreat - Apply now! 🏝️

Additional Resources

• Join my email list 💌
• Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
• Check out my couples course, Secure Together (& save $200 with the code SECURE)
• Save 50% on my Higher Love break-up course with the code PHOENIX
• Visit my website