What you can’t have: The people you pine away for, your secret crushes—the people who rejected you and you still want a deep sense of validation or a feeling of approval from them.

Ever notice this when you’re attached—what are you attached to exactly? Most people cannot specifically say— it’s a feeling of hope cordoning off disappointment.

How else does focusing on what you can’t have come up? Fear of others—ever find yourself trying to be invisible? Just throw a wall up? What is it we think they have as far as power over us or is it a life we think we can’t have?

We may ignore the object of our desire who we feel we can’t have, pretending like we don’t care—and what is it we are actually trying to do? Win? Hide out? What?

Awareness matters. The beliefs we have stretch across our whole life and to see it in as many situations as possible is helpful so you can start counterintuitive action.

Self-acceptance is key. When you focus on what you don’t have from a state of lack—it is reflected inside of you. It’s a great way to see things, but it is also an opportunity to love that part of yourself too. Listen in for tips on how to accept yourself and become empowered.