The Green Ranger takes over Goldar’s job tormenting Jason in the 420 sex dungeon. But the real story is Rita calling up her old frenemy Scorpina to help. Actually no, the real story is the producers ran out of material and stuck a dance-off in the middle of the episode, to really heighten suspense. Yes. A dance-off.

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Maybe you know the MTV documentary produced by Johnny Knoxville, but have you seen the original West Virginia Public Television shows about Jesco White, that spread throughout Hollywood in the early 90s, even reaching the desk of the starmaker himself, Tom Arnold? This guy is pretty cool but he threatens to kill people all the time and can’t dance very well since he devoted his teen years to huffing lighter fluid. Join us for our first documentary episode!

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Rita told the Green Ranger to blend in and bide his time, so he instantly starts insulting everyone and threatening them with green eye lasers. The MMPRs get Alpha up and running, but Zordon is still stuck in the phantom zone. Finster fears unemployment, and Goldar gets thrown into a sex dungeon with Jason, where he talks and talks and talks and talks and talks. More action to follow!

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Watch another comedy, they said. It can’t be worse than Splitting Heirs, they said. It has Michael Caine and Roger Moore in it – they’ll be fun together. Michael Caine can’t be THAT bad at American accents, they said. It’s some guy on Twitter’s guilty pleasure, they said. So we watched Bullseye! Guess how that worked out.

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There’s a new kid in school. He’s really good at martial arts and he wears nothing but green. Rita Repulsa announces repeatedly that he’s going to be the Green Ranger. Trini and Kimberly are both wearing fly new hats. All these signs point to the possibility… that this guy might be… the Green Ranger. Wait – Rita can create Rangers? Why did she not do that before? Anyway, an epic saga is about to unfold.

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