Getting Emotional

This might be one of the more important emotions I've explored, and also one of the emotions I am least qualified to talk about. So I spoke to someone who is: writer Laura Kate Dale!

Gender Euphoria is the joy you feel when thinking about your true gender identity, and it's mostly associated with the transgender or non-binary community. It can occur in different ways, for different reasons. And it's a happy feeling, a feeling of enjoyment and delight. So let's celebrate it!

Laura has recently released a book called 'Gender Euphoria', so she was perfectly placed to talk about what this emotion means and how big a deal it is. Plus, she kindly shared a few stories from the book with me, which gives us a peek into more joyous stories from the trans community, and shows how important those moments of acceptance are.

As Laura mentions at the beginning, gender euphoria is the opposite of gender dysphoria, a more medical term. So I delved a little into that too, and asked Laura if you can have one without the other. Finally, as you can tell, I was just thrilled to find one more happy emotion- one that lets us celebrate and amplify stories that maybe haven't been given as much airtime as they should have.

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I've gone rogue. I've done a Getting Emotional Special. Because this week isn't about one emotion- it's about LOADS of emotions. And I have an word expert (wexpert?) to help me out.

I got in touch with Twitter behemoth Haggard Hawks, aka Paul Anthony Jones, to chat all things words, and boy- he was a fount of knowledge! Paul very kindly shared some words with me that I just hadn't come across in my research, and they're so, so good. Have you felt channel-fever? Imp of the Perverse? Sphexishness? No- I've not made those words up, they actually exist. And Paul is here to tell us all about them.

On the way we learn about some extra, bonus, non-emotion words too. Words you probably had no idea even existed. Like, what do you call something on the other side of a bridge? What's the opposite of a euphemism? What do you call the first cut you make with a saw? Yeah, I can already tell you want to find out the answers. Well you can- just listen to the pod!

If you want to find Paul on Twitter (if you're not following him already) just check @Haggard Hawks, or his site, www.haggardhawks.com. And I'm there too, @getemotionalpod! Come say hello!

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A podcast with free therapy and extracts from my teenage diary? I'm spoiling you, I really am.

Full disclosure, this emotion is intense. Toska is a Russian feeling- often billed as untranslatable, but I've given it a good try. It's a longing for something when you don't know what you're longing for, an anguish, a sadness, a boredom. It's....a bit of a downer.If you're feeling melancholic, or perhaps during lockdown just felt pretty rubbish, you might recognise this emotion.

You'll also be happy to see I've got an expert to help me try and detangle this knotty feeling. Dr Soph Mort is a psychologist- originally working for the NHS, but now working hard to make therapy accessible and approachable for everyone. In the podcast, I discover more about what an emotion actually is (arguably I probably should have done this, like, at the beginning of the last series), how toska can (or can't) feel, and how we can work through it. Because yes, help is at hand! As I discover, this emotion may present in different ways with different people, but that doesn't mean there are little things you can do to minimise the impact of it.

And one of them is journalling! Which, handily, I've been doing since I was a teenager. So I've peppered the show with a handful of my least cringeworthy entries; part-Samuel Pepys, part-Bridget Jones. (Who am I kidding? They're 100% Adrian Mole)

Dr Soph's book is popping up in all sort of excellent reviews and Top 10 lists right now, so go grab her book, A Manuel for Being Human, before it sells out. And find me on twitter @getemotionalpod! It would be lovely to say hello!

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Welcome back! It's a new season of Getting Emotional and it's a bumper episode! This week we're talking about the word 'Brabant', invented in the 80s by writer Douglas Adams (author of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) and TV producer John Lloyd. Yes, it's the name of a principality of the Netherlands, but it's also the word for the joy you feel in pushing someone's buttons. It's a fun game- how far can you push them, will you get them annoyed, and will they appreciate this teasing?

So I tried to find someone who was good at pushing boundaries. Basically, I needed an expert, a prefessional button-pusher. Then I remembered: comedians! They do that all the time! Sure, they're funny, but they also exist to make us think, annoy us, be a bit provocative. So I found a really good one to talk to- Nish Kumar.

In our chat we talk about all types of comedy- from Tim Vine to Stewart Lee, The Simpsons to The Office. They all use button-pushing, in various ways and for different reasons. Nish tells me about how he pushes the audience when he's on stage; teasing them, but also making sure he doesn't tip over into just being mean. Because there's a fine line between 'teasing' and 'cruelty', as he tells us here in a story from his early stand-up days. Plus, there's just no sport in it. So Nish and I take a deep-dive into how to how he manages, and holds, an audience effectively.

But teasing isn't just for comedians- it's for the school joker, the undeniable flirt, the squabbling siblings. And because of that, I think there's something quite sweet about it. Maybe the joy of teasing doesn't come from annoying the other person, but from knowing that you both have the shared in-jokes, history and sense of humour with the other person to make it possible. It's a bond, a connection, a warmth.

Isn't it..?

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Look, it's been a while. I know that, you know that. But I promise all this time away from the mic hasn't been in vain- I've been cooking up a rather brilliant new series for you. I have great guests! I have great emotions! I have great sound effects! What more could you want, eh?!

Guests this series include comedians Nish Kumar and Angela Barnes, Paul Anthony Jones (aka Haggard Hawks), Femi Oluwole and Dr Sophie Mort. Plus I have some other little surprises up my sleeve too. So this is just a little reminder- a Save The Date, if you will- that Series 2 is dropping SOON. And boy, is it going to be emotional...

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It's The End! (Kind of.) It's the last episode of the series, so it's time to look back with a little rewind and recap. Over the last few weeks I've spoken to a lot of incredible people, and sometimes I didn't get time to include everything they told me in the main episodes. So in this one, you can hear extra snippets from Rankin (who also accidentally gives the most hilarious answer to a question I've ever had), Danny Wallace, Dr L, and Rosalie Craig. (From the episodes on vemodalen, goya, limerence, and philoprogenitiveness.)

I also have some extra emotions for you I haven't managed to squeeze in anywhere else- including the thoroughly depressing mutterseelenallein and the joyous basorexia. (I'm not telling you what they are- you have to listen to find out, right?) They may or may not make full episodes in the future, but for now, I thought I would leave you with some new emotions to chew on.

And finally, I'll give you a little teaser on who features in the next series. It's going to be a really good one, I promise...

Thanks so much for listening- this has been so much fun to research, write, present and produce. If you're wondering, in the last few weeks Getting Emotional had thousands of downloads, been featured in the Daily Mirror, Daily Express, The Observer, and a bunch of local papers. It's also hit the number 1 spot in Apple's documentary chart, and been featured in the Great British Podcasts newsletter. If that's series 1, just think what we can do in series 2!

Of course, none of this would happen without any listeners, so thank you so much for listening and subscribing. If you'd like to get in touch, please do leave a review and drop me a comment, or find me on twitter @getemotionalpod. I'll see you in a few weeks!

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Here in Britain, we're known for having a 'stiff upper lip'.But do other countries have an equivalent? Well, Finland certainly does! And they called it 'sisu'.

It's about grit, determination, and working toward a goal. It's a willingness to keep on going, even though you might not win the battle you're fighting. Hey, even if you don't win, the victory is in trying. There's no direct translation in English, so I've done my best to dig out the spirit of the word. And I've come to the conclusion it's about being gutsy, showing chutzpah, and just...keeping on. Pure determination through adversity.

I've had the best time researching this word, and finding out more about a country I (embarrassingly) knew very little about. My research took me to the Finlandia University in Michigan, where I found a Professor of Finnish and Nordic Studies- Dr Hilary Virtanen (@HilaryVirtanen on twitter). Not only did she give me more info on sisu, she told me about times she, or students on her campus, have felt it too. After speaking to her I got a real sense that sisu, and the Finnish community she works with, are something pretty special.

I also decided to ask around, and see if anyone else had felt this determination through adversity. And during a chat with Clare Balding about her new children's book, 'Fall Off, Get Back On, Keep Going', I realised this feeling extends to kids as well as adults. Her book is about giving kids the skills and belief they need to face struggles in life, and it's an absolute winner- I highly recommend it! And she very kindly told me about a very candid story from her own past- one that I'd never heard before- as an example of a time she's had to work through.

Sisu was quite the most intriguing word I've come across in a long time, and it gave me a chance to indulge my love of history too. If anything, making this podcast was quite the opposite of sisu- it was a joy to make! Hopefully you enjoy listening as much as I enjoyed putting it together. And next time you find yourself going through something a little tough- dig deep, and you might find some sisu to help you through.

Oh, if you want to say hi, I'm on twitter, @GetEmotionalPod. Thanks!

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You hear 'vu', you think of 'déjà', right? Yeah, fair enough, most people do. But did you know that déjà has two siblings, often overlooked? I'm talking about presque and jamais, and I'd argue they bring just as much to the table as their big sister does.

The Vus (I like to think of them as a girl band, by the way) comprise of three states of mind, all pretty common, but one just more famous than the others. Déjà, as you may already know, roughly means 'already seen'- but what of the two others? Well, presque is known as 'almost seen' and jamais, 'never seen'. Between them they're equally frustrating, and very common.

So let's find out a little about them! Have you ever felt something on the 'tip of your tongue'? Then you've felt presque vu! And ever not recongnised something you probably should? Then jamais vu is your jam! Of course, I'll go into a little more detail in the episode. Plus, I manage to squeeze in references to The Matrix, Bridget Jones, Beyonce, BTS and Atomic Kitten. Never say I don't have my finger on the pulse.

Also, you may notice there's no guest for this one. Every now and again a feeling that comes along that is...unguestable. I have a list of these emotions, willing to be made into shows, but sadly uncoupled with people to talk about them. So instead I brought in some old friends to provide a bit of context. Wonderful Guy Kelly (@brainmage) discusses his dealings with déjà, and Richard Soames (@RichardSoames) and Benedict Salter help me out with their acting skills.

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When you're sad, you cry. But what do you do when you're happy? Sometimes, you have an overwhelming amount of joy and just don't know what to do with it. Maybe you feel overwhelmed and leave the situation, maybe you get stressed out, or maybe you feel the emotional version of a sugar rush, and sugar crash.

This idea of 'debilitating joy' was one I found on The Cut, a site that's part of the New York magazine family. It was written about by Annie Armstrong, and she kindly agreed to tell me a little more about it- from her inspiration of childhood book series, The Berenstain Bears, to her own experiences. And she points out this feeling isn't birthday-specific; it could occur at any moment where you're just a little...too...happy. Perhaps you're walking down a sunny street, or seeing a great show, or delighted to see your friends again- what do you do with that surplus joy?

We got to thinking- in a post-Covid world, will this be something we experience more often? As the world opens up and we're faced with more fun, will it be overwhelming? Will we feel, just a little bit, of Too Much Birthday?

Big thanks to Annie for chatting to me- you can find her on twitter at @anniesalright. We're there too, on @getemotionalpod. Come and say hi!

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Today, we're representing the parents. This feeling- the impulse of parental love- will be familiar to many, and so unknown to others. I'm in the latter category, so I needed an interesting mum to talk to, and boy did I find one!

Rosalie Craig (@Rosiemae on twitter) is an exceptional award-winning actress, appearing on stage and screen. Most recently, you may have seen her onstage in The Ferryman, City of Angels, or the ground-breaking revival of Stephen Sondheim's Company. She's also a mum, and like other parents, is trying to navigate her life via the love, fear, and joy that comes with having children.

I talk to Rosalie about what it feels like to have kids, whether that love was instant, and what it's like being a West End lead who also just wants to get home and tuck their kid into bed. Rosalie is funny, interesting and totally honest about about tricky it can be.

In case you're wondering, philoprogenitiveness comes from the now-debunked pseudoscience of phrenology, but don't worry- all will be revealed. Oh, and if you're feeling a little raw about a parent not being around anymore, feel free to skip this ep. I've gone through it too, and I know how it feels. Sending you all a big squidge x

Oh, also - Panama Hat by Audionautix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 licence. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Artist: http://audionautix.com/

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