Growth Marriage

Logan Ury is one of those people I could talk to for HOURS. She's a TED Resident, Author, and Dating Coach. She hosted the Modern Romance series at Google which featured guests like Esther Perel and Drs. John and Julie Gottman. And she's just a fascinating person to talk to. I hope you enjoy this conversation which is essentially two relationship nerds picking each others' brains regarding what makes some marriages work while others fail, how to choose a partner, whether we expect too much from our partners, the intersection of sex and spirituality, and TONS more. For more writing and research on all things dating and relationships, follow Logan on Facebook and subscribe to her newsletter for free here.

I've been doing this marriage podcast for almost 7 years... and for 3 of them I've been married. And for some reason, I've never officially introduced you to my wife. No idea why. So in this episode you FINALLY get to meet Angilyn. And we're going to share with you one of the tools we use to keep our marriage healthy, thriving, and on-track. We call it the Relationship Inventory. You can call it whatever you want. I hope you enjoy getting a real personal look into our relationship.

"We just need better communication." "I just don't feel like I can trust him." "We need to do better at giving each other the benefit of the doubt." These are all symptoms of a relationship that doesn't have a strong foundation of emotional safety. Create more safety, and these problems will resolve themselves. In today's episode we talk with Marriage Coach, Maggie Reyes about some practical ways you can create more emotional safety in your relationship.

Can you turn off your phone from 5:30 PM - 5:30 AM to make room for what's important? Can you say "no" to distractions so you can say "yes" to your priorities? Are you truly committed to epic love... or do you just tell yourself you are? Find out in today's episode.

John and Julie Gottman are the pioneers of relationship research. Their work has transformed the lives of millions of people all over the world. Yesterday, their new book Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love came out, and I thought today would be a great chance to re-broadcast their interview and encourage you to snag the book. I hope you enjoy this interview with 2 absolute legends.

What are boundaries? Why are they important? How can I connect more with people who will uplift and support me to create the most epic marriage on the planet? We talk about all that and more on this week's episode with Dr. John Townsend, author of the NYT Bestseller, "Boundaries."

Dale Reeves has worked over 1,500 cases as an interrogator, and has a 100% confession rate. He worked 2 cases where he had to return to his client and report, "The people I interviewed are not guilty." In both cases, the client came back to him and told him that the money/merchandise that was reported missing was due to error, and there was in fact, no crime at all. Dale is a master of interpersonal communication, and human relationships. He handles high-conflict, high-stress, high-emotion conversations every day. In this interview he'll talk about: Three things to NEVER do in a conversation if you want to create connection What he does to prepare for his interrogations that will help you see your partner/loved one in a completely different light, and change the way you engage with them in the conversation. How to GIVE your partner values and virtues they may not currently possess

When should you leave your relationship and when should you say? It's a touch subject, but we get into it today... and we talk about the lame excuse of "Staying together for the kids" that SO many people use to stay in terrible relationships and not work on them. It's a delicate subject to address, and it might ruffle some feathers, but it needed to be said.

In life, you get to choose between the pain of growth and the pain of staying the same. If you choose to stay the same, you repeat the same problems over and over and over again. Growth, on the other hand, comes with pain... but it also fulfillment and accomplishment. In today's episode you'll find out how something as simple as breathing can help you choose the right pain to live a fulfilling live and create an epic relationship.

The truth is, most people want marriage to be comfortable. Comfortable is easy. Comfortable is safe. Comfortable is predictable and doesn't force us to confront scary things. When you change as a partner - when you truly commit to becoming a better version of yourself, and then follow through by taking action - things stop being so comfortable... and your partner might not like that.