In this episode, we explore the idea of reconciling with our past selves and giving them the love they deserve. We all have cringe-worthy moments and mistakes from our past that can still haunt us. 

But instead of beating ourselves up, we can show love and compassion to those old versions of ourselves. Healing old wounds and mistakes is important not only to heal our current selves but also our past selves. Join us in this discussion on how to love and heal the old you.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

Healing and Wholeness [00:41]

• Everybody evolves

• Closure can be a version of healing

• Loving who we become

Loving all parts of ourselves [ 03:42] 

• Forgiving our past selves

• Inner child sometimes shows up and needs acceptance and support.

• Triggers can be reminders of a younger version of ourselves that still needs love and acceptance. 

• Past versions of ourselves can still show up in our current life.

• Never leave words unsaid 

How do I approach my past with grace? [11:54]

• ForgivenessRelease good affirmations: “You are enough”

• Hug yourself when you need to 

• Knowing that we are in the constant path of evolving to our higher selves

How do we reconcile past versions of ourselves? [24:28]

• Journaling can be a helpful tool in this process.

• Writing letters to our past versions can be a way to affirm and acknowledge the choices we made in the past

• The goal is to figure out what needs to be done to become whole and healed individuals.

The power of forgiving and reconciling with our past selves [28:21] 

• Forgiving past versions of ourselves and reconciling with our whole selves can give us permission to move to the next level of our lives.

• We can fully embrace who we are and use our past experiences as examples to help others.

• Our history and past experiences can propel us into our future.

• Being honest about our past experiences and recognizing that others have gone through similar things can help us normalize and universalize our struggles.

• We can learn from our past experiences and use the lessons to build bridges for others who may be going through similar struggles.

Moving on vs. Healing: Letting Go of Shame and Embracing Forgiveness [34:06]

• Moving on and being healed are two different things.

• Carrying shame about our past mistakes can hold us back from feeling worthy of moving forward and achieving the things we want.

• Guilt can teach us lessons, but shame is a weight we don't need to carry.

• It's important to separate our guilt from our sense of worthiness and embrace forgiveness to fully move forward in our lives.
  

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

 Brene Brown

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

It is possible for us to recognize the areas where we have been hurt and strive to not let them control our actions or our responses. It could be a hazy process, but we’ll figure it out together. 

In today’s episode, we talk about who hurts you, how that pain manifests in your daily life, and how to navigate through it all. 

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

Moments that make you think “who hurt you?” [2:39] 

• Being afraid of good things 

• Staying on your comfort zone (when that’s not where happiness usually is) 

• Having the “flight” response 

• Difficulty in trusting others

• Unwillingness to experience disappointment 

Avoiding to react from our hurt places [13:23]

• The importance of self-awareness 

• Remembering that the energy you emit is the same energy that goes back to you 

The haze of addressing those hurt places [20:36]

• Finding the grace to accept others, especially love ones, who are not willing to address their hurt places 

• Having to have uncomfortable conversations 

• Recognizing generational differences 

• Recognizing  the privilege of speaking from a place of healing

Navigating through the haze of addressing hurt places [30:29]

• Having the emotional bandwidth to addressing the issues

• Setting  real boundaries and having the maturity to deal with discomfort 

• Making sure you’re always speaking your truth—disagreeing can be respectful and coming from the place of love

• How can you have grace for this person, but also teach them how to love you? 

• Avoiding to hurt others in the process 

Lessons [37:22]

• How people act is not about you—don’t take things personally 

• People’s interaction with you is not a totality of who they are; don’t be too self-centered

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

The Four Agreements 

Listen to Ugly Part of Me by Avery Sunshine 

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

“When you're guarded, yes, you keep the bad out. But you also keep the good from coming in.” 

This statement from Dr. Nicole LaBeach really resonated with us, and we want to put this conversation in the spotlight. 

How important are vulnerability, authenticity, and choosing to let others in? How can we find a balance among these things and live a happier, more fulfilled life? 

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

Why staying ready sometimes mean staying defensive [2:26]

• You don’t let things that hurt you in the past hurt you again

• You want to brace yourself for whatever may come 

• Your hands are always closed, not open to receive anything (even the good things) 

• This generation is all about staying ready 

• You keep people get to know you in a deeper level, and most of the time, you don’t realize this

Fearing vulnerability  [9:15]

• The world taught you that in order to be vulnerable, you need to be in a safe space 

• Can you show the authentic, unguarded version of you without the potential of getting hurt? 

• We fear being judged and being pitied 

• We have an innate need for feeling supported 

• Being in situations where you chose to be vulnerable but it didn’t pan out well 

The haze of being vulnerable vs. unguarded [29:44] 

• Having regrets for your what-ifs and what-could-have-beens

• The fear of unbinding your hands and receiving the uncertain 

• Being research-based rather than faith-based (it requires faith to be vulnerable)

• Beating yourself up for decisions that gave results that are different from what you desired

Navigating through the haze [35:13]

• Making decisions solely based on the person you’re trying to become—doing it scared 

• Trust and enjoying the journey and making adjustments along the way 

• Being wary of making the same mistakes 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Put A Ring on It with Dr. Nicole LaBeach

Listen to Let Me In by Anthony David

Read After the Rain by Alexandra Elle

Follow @blackmenheal on Instagram 

Follow @therapyforblackgirls on Instagram

Follow @askdrnicole on Instagram

Follow @talk2spirit on Instagram

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Travelling has always been a great way to find solace, renewal, and healing—and it gets better when experienced with people we love. 

In this episode, we look back on our #BlackLoveJourney to Destin, Florida. 

If you’re thinking about visiting Destin, this episode is especially for you. Tune in to hear about our accommodations and reflections.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

What to look forward to when visiting Destin, Florida [1:08]

• Just 5 hours away from Atlanta

• Pretty affordable condos in Silver Shells 

• Accommodation that’s right on the beach, with pool, gym, parking spot and many other amenities 

• You can just hang out on the balcony and listen to the sound of the beach (perfect for praying or meditating) 

• The condos have a full kitchen setup where you’re free to cook 

• There are LOTS of things to do 

Favorite moments [10:12]

• Hanging out by the water listening to music, drinking, napping (and repeat)

• The condos that have everything you’ll ever need 

• The trip was affordable 

The haze of going on trips [18:01]

• The long drive 

• It’s a bit hard to sit and drive and not fall asleep 

• Staying in places where the beach is not easily accessible (finding parking, chairs, etc.)

• Going during holidays could hike up the prices

• Depending on where you go, there could be jellyfish (Gulf Shores) 

Reflections [23:01]

• It’s very important to get away and unplug from everything

• It’s good to go on trips with people you love 

• Being intentional with where you go and doing things you haven’t done before 

• Home can be wherever you want it to be

• Vacations can be like a religious experience 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Silver Shells in Destin

Gulf Shores

Listen to Comfortable by H.E.R.

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Whether you like it or not, your triggers will come knocking at the door whenever they want. So it pays to be always ready when they do. 

In this episode, let's delve into the topics of triggers, trauma responses, and how to move forward from them. 

We learned a lot from this episode. We know that you will too, so tune in. 

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

What a ‘trigger’ really is [3:41]

• The inability to be present because of something that’s happened in the past 

• Something that causes an emotional distress 

• Remembering your trauma and responding to it 

• Your triggers can’t be forgotten, but you can heal from it 

• People tend to develop coping mechanisms as response to triggers 

• Triggers are not a bad thing at all—they’re learning experiences 

“When I’m hysterical, it’s historical” [13:06]

• Leaving the present (and the future), going back to the unchangeable past, and operating from that place 

• Running away from what hurts you is a band-aid solution; you’ll eventually have to face it

The haze of triggers [16:44]

• The difficulty to identify triggers 

• The mentality to cope with triggers triggers doesn’t come easy, especially for men, who have been wired to be strong 

• The inability to move forward because of second-guessing yourself

Navigating the haze [20:42]

• Naming your triggers and saying the out loud 

• Learning about new ways to cope—the method that you’re doing before might not be the best way to cope now 

• “Forgiving and forgetting” may not be real 

• Give yourself grace that you could pass on to others 

• Finding a mentor/loved one/friend/professional that would support you 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Listen to Make It Home by Tobe Nwigwe

Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday

Why You're Not Married . . . Yet: The Straight Talk You Need to Get the Relationship You Deserve by Tracy McMillan

Shook One by Charlamagne Tha God

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Chris & Patrice Thompson chat with us about navigating marriage. From their vision of success to disagreements to growing together, The Thompsons keep it real! In this episode, we'll be diving deep into their motivations behind starting Marriage Matters, what it means to them personally, and the valuable lessons they've learned along the way as a married couple. We're excited to hear about their drive to share information and help others build strong, healthy relationships.So sit back, relax, and join us as we explore the fascinating world of marriage.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR:

The start of Marriage Matters [2:32]

• Patrice and Chris Thompson share their personal experiences with marriage and the challenges they faced early on

• They found comfort in knowing that they were not alone in their struggles

• They started Marriage Matters as a way to support other couples going through similar challenges

• Their goal is to help couples build and maintain happy, healthy marriages

• They emphasize the importance of creating a safe space for couples to come together and share their experiences and learn from one another

• They believe that hearing from other couples who have gone through similar challenges can help to strengthen marriages

• They hope to reduce the divorce rate by providing a supportive community and sharing valuable insights and advice.

What does success in marriage look like? [8:03]

• Open communication and the ability to talk about anything, even difficult topics.

• Being able to be oneself in a relationship and accepting and liking one's partner for who they are. 

• Financial issues can be a factor in failed marriages but do not necessarily define success in a marriage. 

• Willingness to not give up and to do whatever it takes to make it work.

• Self-reflection is important in evaluating contributions to the relationship Open communication helps resolve conflicts and work through challenges.

• Sincerity in efforts to maintain and strengthen the relationship is key.

• Having safe spaces

• Alignment in values

Communication is important [13:49] 

• Lack of communication can create distance and drive a wedge between partners

• Vocalizing emotions and feeling safe in that space is crucial for successful communication

• A safe space for communication includes no fear of having your words used against you

• Being able to express emotions and work through them together is beautiful and crucial for a successful relationship

The haze of building a successful marriage [20:41]

• Pride can be a major hurdle in building a successful marriage

• Expectations of what a marriage should be can lead to difficulty in admitting fault or making changes

• Prior experiences and upbringing can shape one's view of what a successful marriage looks like

• Every relationship is unique and what works for one couple may not work for another

• Flexibility and willingness to adjust the recipe of success is key

Things they wish they’d known before marriage [41:22]

• It's important to have respectful disagreements and follow-up conversations to get on the same page in a marriage.

• Continuing counseling, even after premarital counseling, can be helpful for checking in on the marriage.

• It's important to learn how to hold space and have "me time" in a marriage.

  TO STAY CONNECTED:

  1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

  2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

  3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

  If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

We recently had the pleasure of visiting the stunning island of St. Lucia, and it was nothing short of amazing. We planned this trip as a joint 40th birthday and honeymoon celebration, and it turned out to be the perfect destination for both occasions. St. Lucia exceeded all our expectations. From the lush greenery to the crystal clear waters, this island truly is a tropical paradise.

In this episode, we'll give you a glimpse into the culture and people we encountered during our stay. Our trip turned into a group celebration with some of our friends joining in on the fun. Join us as we take you on a journey to St. Lucia.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

40th birthday celebration and honeymoon [5:18]

• We stayed at Royalton, an all-inclusive property in the island

• We celebrated with a group of friends 

• We did a couple of different excursions

• We did a private yacht party for the Saturday before Shate's birthday

• Trying some local food

• Met a lot of amazing black people 

Navigating the haze of traveling [17:56]

• Consider travel time from the airport to your destination

• Load up and bring some snacks

Favorite moments from the trip [19:25] 

• Scott’s Favorite moment: opening the sliding door and seeing the ocean

• The feeling of looking out over the water and not seeing the end to it

• Connection to beach and water gives a feeling of relaxation and release

• Smelling the fresh air and feeling the atmosphere hit all at once

• Able to fully relax and appreciate the reason for being there

• Shate’s birthday cruise and being able to enjoy the scenery with the amazing people

• Black pool moment

Takeaways from the trip [32:53]

• Taking a reflective and intentional approach to life

• Seeking to bring a sense of peace and relaxation into our daily life even with a demanding work schedule

• The overall approach is one of mindfulness and intentional living.

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Today's conversation is about being in the middle of it all as we navigate through change and evolution with the podcast. 

We're excited to share some new and exciting changes with you today. Firstly, we're doing away with seasons and will be having rolling conversations every two weeks. This means that we can continue to have meaningful conversations without any breaks in between. Secondly, we won't be having any seasonal themes. Instead, we'll be having ongoing conversations about everything that comes with navigating through life, relationships, and healing. 

Also, we have a new segment on the Love Haze podcast called Black Love Journeys, which explores our physical, emotional and spiritual journeys as a couple. We'll be sharing our personal experiences and insights, as well as inviting some amazing guests to join us on this journey.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

What does it mean to be in the middle of something  [2:36]

• Having a perfect plan for navigating towards one's purpose can be unrealistic

• Healing and personal growth is an ongoing journey, not a destination

• Life will continue to happen and may trigger past struggles or insecurities

• Accepting being "in the middle of it" and learning to move forward despite challenges is important

• Life is a continuous process of evolving, forgiving, and moving forward.

The haze of lack of control [24:18]

• The need for control and organization is important for many people, but it can also become a problem.

• Feeling out of control can create a sense of uncertainty.

• It is not always possible to have complete control over one's environment or emotions.

• Letting go of control and learning to adapt to unexpected situations is important for personal growth.

• Cultivating a sense of peace, hope, faith, and love can help to navigate through the haze of uncertainty.

Coping with the haze of uncertainty [26:12] 

• The haze of uncertainty can cause stress and anxiety.

• Acknowledge and accept the uncertainty rather than resisting or denying it.

• Try to focus on the present moment and take things one day at a time.

• Set small goals for themselves to help create a sense of control and accomplishment.

• Engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation can help alleviate stress.

• Access support networks and seek professional help if needed.

• Finding ways to reframe uncertainty as an opportunity for growth or change can help shift perspective.

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Drink Champs Podcast

TED Talks

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Season 2 has just ended, and we couldn’t have been more grateful to our guests slash friends who willingly shared powerful tidbits of knowledge around purpose. 

In this episode, we revisit these empowering episodes to look back to the lessons we have learned and be inspired to make a difference in our own ways. 

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

Revisit-worthy conversations with our power guests [2:55]

• Jessica and the story of how she was fired and ended up beating an incumbent for the seat her mother held 

• Brandy and Mau and how they struggled getting accepted into different grad schools and programs but are now both doing fulfilling work 

• Onaje, who is a strong voice that educates our community about our culture 

• Flo, who didn’t have any plans right now, but is always curious and excited with the work she does as an advocate for people’s rights

• Kenneth and Omar and how the secret to finding something you love is exposing yourself to new things 

• Shamiah and Jihan, who are courageous enough to bet on themselves

Powerful lessons [9:31] 

• The idea of a ‘calling’ vs. something you’re interested in 

• You don’t have to have things figured out from the get-go 

• Letting your purpose be bigger than your fear

The haze of finding purpose in the work that you do [16:10]

• Betting on yourself can be scary 

• Being intentional with doing things that are important to you and continuing to figure things out 

• Working in an organization, you don't know how your words are going to be received. Will you keep your mouth closed, or speak up? 

• It is us that's driving change

• There are so many things we have to fight against (but we also have folks who stand with us) 

How we can take part in bringing change [42:45] 

• It can be as simple as spreading the word such as sharing a Facebook post 

• Understanding the impact that black leadership has

• Showing support such as buying Black art

Biggest takeaways and lessons [45:14]

• You can find your purpose by being open, being present, by being in the moment 

• Being authentic

• Trust your gut—being uncertain is okay 

• Don’t compare yourself with others 

• Trust the process 

• Continue to bet on yourself, and you’ll be surprised with the outcome 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho 

Episode 7: Healing through history with Dr. Maurice Hobson

Episode 8: Caring for our community and ourselves with Jessica Green

Episode 9: Running your own race with Brandy Shavon

Episode 10: Becoming custodians of our culture with Onaje Henderson

Episode 11: Advocating for the health of our community with Flojaune Cofer

Episode 12: Community involvement with Shamiah Kerney

Episode 13: Mentoring our youth with Omari Henderson & Kenneth White

CONNECT WITH OUR GUESTS: 

The Greenhouse Family Resource Center 

Zucot Gallery

Youth Challenge, Inc.

The Legend of the Black Mecca by Maurice Hobson 

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

In the first season, we talked a lot about healing and wholeness. But this season, we have shifted, and now we're talking about purpose work in the community. 

To help with this mission, in this episode, we’re happy to chat with Dr. Jihan, board certified pediatrician, owner of Peace of Mind Pediatrics, and board member of Clara Community Health Center. Dr. Jihan shares some nuggets of gold about finding purpose in healing underserved communities.

WHAT TO LISTEN FOR: 

How Dr. Jihan found her way through Medicine [2:06]

• The story of her friend’s untimely death that led her to becoming a doctor (instead of being a lawyer, which was her first dream) 

• How her perspective of health care changed 

• Her journey as a pediatrician giving out service to underserved communities 

The haze of being a doctor (and a mom) [16:40] 

• Educating patients who have learning difficulties 

• Dealing with discourteous people

• Taking care of oneself 

• Managing family life

The rewards of being a doctor [27:24] 

• Saving the lives of young kids 

• Being able to help the less privileged

Recognizing your purpose [32:08] 

• Feeling satisfaction and gratitude even amidst chaos 

• What you’re good at may not necessarily be your purpose (i.e. just because you’re good in Chemistry and Math doesn’t mean you should be an engineer) 

• Sometimes you just feel it, you just know 

• If we listen, a lot of times, the universe conspires to lead you to your purpose 

• Being unafraid to fail and realizing that your mistakes is not the end 

• Progress over perfection 

Biggest advice for those who want to figure out their purpose [43:10] 

• Stop being upset with things that you can’t change and with things that happened in the past 

• Mistakes are inevitable, but we can grow from them 

How we can help Dr. Jihan empower the community [47:23] 

• Are there free clinics? Do people know about free clinics? 

• Are we volunteering our services

• Do we support our health workers? 

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Listen to some jazz with John Coltrane

CONNECT WITH DR. JIHAN

Follow her on Facebook 

Visit Clara Health Center’s website 

Follow Clara Community Health Center on Facebook

TO STAY CONNECTED:

1. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Spotify Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Music for this moment.

2. Follow @iamshate on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

3. Follow @scotthayes_lcsw on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you'd like either of us to join your next panel or event, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.