We’re back! Crystal was sick, William almost died, Carolyn is getting security cameras and anxiety has been ruining Pata Fria’s plans. Middle school kids are bad, Crystal interrupted an adventure, don’t use liquid car fresheners and avoid self checkouts.

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Carolyn and Pata Fria are out of control, it’s SA Awareness Month, we’re praying for a new reality show and if you exploit ppl you deserve to be a little scammed. FREE PALESTINE.

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FREE PALESTINE and s/o any countries finally stepping in, check online for unclaimed money, treat yourself to a new bra, it’s hard to stay asleep and Pata Fria is exploring age play.

Keep sending us your lie stories and write ins and please subscribe/comment/rate and review!

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Cemeteries are shady, we’re clearing out some merch, mail is still being stolen and Crystal’s ghost is getting personal. We may have discovered the cutest job ever, there’s a movie to look forward to, respect people that wanna leave the party and unexpected blessings are always nice.

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Chemtrails are making us sick, be careful at CVS, the caregiver saga continues and Pata Fria’s exes are all in sync. Let’s try fake toenails, Crystal has new animals, population concerns are really about capitalism and BBL’s do not SMELL!

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Being a woman is fun, said no one ever. Crystal is experiencing life thru a new lens. Brain disorders really hinder being a human and Pata Fria overcame a fear. Crystal is still functioning as a death doula, women’s hygiene products are top tier, businesses are leaving, humanity is evaporating and you gotta be careful around dogs.

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Phone service was down, stay away from minors, numbing spray works wonders and we’re full of worms. Girl Scouts are cancelled, celebrities are gross and be careful with plumping lip gloss!

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Happy Valentine’s Day, don’t eat bees, tweakers are so horny and drugs aren’t safe to experiment with anymore.

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We had a little technical difficulty in the beginning but here we are. Testing new lighting, football fans are insane, perimenopause is upon us and being alone is pleasant. We love an ice cream sandwich family, Crystal might need to upgrade her cigs, 9-11 is still on speed dial and dress for the partner you want. 

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Crystal had Covid, let’s read books, the rain won’t stop and getting old is not a good time. Prepare your kids for adulthood, women are pervs too, don’t ask people their body count and always be aware of your surroundings.

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