Hello Dysfunction

We’re back!
Happy Birthday Stinkers, Peez loves Sugawolf, Nyah finally got a good doctor and you might still be carrying your baby daddy’s DNA. We live in North Korea, Pat helps a neighbor sneak out, classical is medicine and don’t steal from dead people.

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Crystal had some major dental work, RIP Cat Woman, we need a shed and car stuff can be overwhelming. Carolyn won’t listen and Jimbo might be her roommate, Pat’s phone is full of mysteries, Crystal discovered a disgusting way to get high and we love a thrifting score.

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Co-sleeping is amazing, a few cigs are good as a treat, the 90s had the best shoes and stockings are Crystal’s jam. Peez loves Jesus, women are magic, don’t be a mood killer and corporations are GREEDY.

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Cults are fascinating, Carolyn’s chemical warfare, billionaires are scum and we’ve made some mistakes. Older kids are a different kind of stress, sometimes you just gotta explode, pigs contain human and nature provides everything we need. 

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Crystal had food poisoning and deleted our texts, Pat loves Home Depot and has been locked in with the DIYs. Playing 432hz at night might relax you OR terrorize your dreams, having kids later in life comes with a price. 

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hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

1970 was 30yrs ago, Pat started a new tattoo, Crystal is researching classified CIA docs and CEOs should be worried. Humans aren’t meant to be this busy, we miss a well loved bear, inspect your butthole and old people do not want technology. 

For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon!
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hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

It’s nice seeing family, salt might be causing migraines, Crystal was on a hunt for “Crisssssss” and we’re getting back in the gym. Experiences are better than toys for Xmas, Peez is thankful she’s beautiful, Grenandine is a lie and we want a rage room. 

For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon!
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Instagram.com/crystaldamato21

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hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Pat is your lesbian aunt that loves bowling, cigarettes are making a comeback, angry kids are not fun and angry cops are even worse. Everyone’s getting migraines, monitor your kid’s downloads, Facebook groups are a good time and basketball players are weirdly close. 

For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon!
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Instagram.com/crystaldamato21

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hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

The universe gave us a Christmas blessing, American dental work pricing is shameful, increase your fiber and stay away from the Bad News Bears. Peez is subscribing to things, Pata Fria has a type, aliens are here and get your HD merch while you can! 

For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon!
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Instagram.com/lurkpatafria
Instagram.com/crystaldamato21

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hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

The energy is off in the world, you can’t be an outlaw AND a bootlicker, follow criminal etiquette and you have to eat food. Merch orders are now open, pedis are great without the horny parts, roid rage is not fun and good men still exist, somewhere..

For bonus episodes and early releases join Patreon!
Patreon.com/hellodysfunction

Subscribe on YouTube!
https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunction

Follow us on IG:
Instagram.com/hellodysfunction
Instagram.com/lurkpatafria
Instagram.com/crystaldamato21

Email us your questions/stories:
hellodysfunctionpodcast.com