It's not uncommon for communication between two individuals in a relationship to go sideways. And when the pattern is sideways for many years, it becomes even more challenging to set right the cart. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer and Brian Sutter explain how to do just that.

Show notes:

The speaker/listener model is a structured approach for communication that enhances understanding between two individuals or parties.

When do you use it?

• When communication is not working and understanding is not being reached.

How does it work?

• Roles are determined. One party is the speaker, and the other is the listener.
• The speaker succinctly expresses a message.
• The listener responds by telling the speaker what they said.
• The speaker determines if the listener understands.
  • If yes, the speaker continues.
  • If no, the speaker tries the message again.
• Appropriately, reverse roles.

What does it do?

• It slows down the conversation.
• It promotes understanding between the parties.
• It helps clarify what should be communicated.
• It gives a chance for communicative trust to grow.
• It gives the space for individuals to regulate their emotions during the conversation.

What are the prerequisites for success?

• Participants need to be able to take on another person's perspective.
• Participants need to be able to regulate their emotions.
• Participants need to be able to play by the conversation rules.