How do you Feel? A Self-Help Guru's Quest for Your Brain

How do you Feel? A Self-Help Guru's Quest for Your Brain

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How do you Feel? A Self-Help Guru's Quest for Your Brain episodes

  • HDYF 37 A Horrible Waft of Shat
    I'm calm, cool, collected and caring about you. Please pause for a double stack and a six pack.
    Regret is something I know a lot about. If you regret your past in the future, your future will be full of regret. I can't bend your arm backwards and break it. I can only hurt your feelings. I have clients and have control over their entire life. I baby them and they are wealthy enough to pay for it. You have to listen to with your ears not your brain. A horrible waft of shat. Imagine all of your problems as poop and you have shat your pants with emotional distress. You can wipe it all over yourself. It's so thick. If you want it, you'll get it. if you don't get it, that means you didn't want it enough. Failure is something we choose not to do. The things that people who fail do do are the things people who win don't do. So sick of people judging me for driving drunk. I chose to live the life of a humble man. A servant of God don't drive no Beemer. A three-wheeler on Sunday. You are a beautiful blue Marlin jumping out of the water and into life. The water is hell...but life is heaven.




    Audio Show:
    -Itunes
    -RSS

    Websites:
    -How Do You Feel? on myspace
    -Produced by Mark Baratelli
    12 min
  • HDYF 36 Santa Aint Netflix
    I am not a miracle worker. You're a special flower growing in a garden of weeds. Most people around you are wrong. If only the world could work the way you see it working, wouldn't it be a better place? Communicate with talking. Bothered by women in bikinis. Those things that make us different are the things that make us unique. Corporate lawyers retire at 45. You ever think of popcorn? If you took your eating time and instead worked on being a better person, imagine how good you'd be. Increased moments of feeling good add up to being happy. I am a wizard. What is a car that doesn't work? $2.71? Is that with tax? Their son is retarded. Parents lie to children. Santa Claus is a secret. Life sucks is a secret. Is 1-12 the only age a human being can believe in a lie? No. Santa Claus never told you "I'm fake." Santa ain't Netflix. We're all animals. Adult mouth-sized straw. Here's your Emmy. You better watch your mate. How Do you Feel Lifestyle Compound. What is special about you? Monogamy is a lie. It keeps us all from humping around too much. Thats why AIDS was created. Thats in the bible. The bed industry wants you to have a bigger bed.




    How Do You Feel?
    -Podcast in Itunes
    -Podcast RSS
    Podcast on Myspace
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    21 min
  • HDYF 35 Bashing Tony Robbins
    I'm too lazy to do show notes but not too lazy to say a prayer for you. You're welcome.



    How Do You Feel?
    Podcast in Itunes
    Podcast RSS
    Podcast on Myspace
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    20 min
  • HDYF 34 You lost the failure race
    Why is your misery still here? Today is that day. If only. The time is right now. Rome wasn't built in a day. New York City didn't exist until it said it was New York City. It is the birthplace of art. What are you the birthplace of? Blogging tips. I'm not your friend. You're a fat poor person who will not make a difference in this world until you put up your own finish line. What if? They know change will happen. Pretty soon you'll be dead. There are no steps. You've raced towards failure...and you lost. Decide you are done running the misery race you've lost. Stop following your instincts. Change is like a necklace you didn't even know you were wearing. I will become someone I wasn't born to be.



    Audio Show:
    -on Itunes
    -RSS
    How Do You Feel? on myspace.com
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    19 min
  • HDYF 33 Excitement Prevents Cancer
    Excitement prevents Cancer. Assignment: make a list of 400 things to be excited about today. My friends Meg and Paul are miserable. I have never wanted to hid kids like I do with their kids. They created their own misery. You are not the saddest person you know. If you are miserable, you've go friends who are miserable. The grass is always browner if you make it so. Blah blah blah horsesehoes. I'm a doctor even though I'm not one because I have cured people of emotional obesity. The young person was put to rest. I blame myself for not becoming a doctor. You have to value yourself in order to bring about change. Dumba** changes their mind. I love to see people smile. I like to see the change happen in people. If I could reach through this phone and snap off your nose, I would. Change is possible if you value yourself enough to spend the time to make the change happen. That spit in the palm of your hand is my hand in yours. Hold that spit in your hand. That spit is me.



    =200514127" rel="noopener noreferrer">Podcast in Itunes
    Podcast RSS
    How Do You Feel? on myspace.com
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    17 min
  • HDYF 32 Emotional Prostitute
    I miss you even though we don't know each other. Let me be your emotional prostitute. I don't need the type of money Apple says I can make through selling my shows on itunes because you're too poor. The cold makes New Yorkers unhappy. The subway is a coat. Your stomach has taste buds. What do you want to do with your life? Only you can fix yourself (in certain instances). Don't associate with actors. Not caring is the best thing to say when you don't care. I'm the second most intelligent person you've talked to. We do not have a purpose in life until someone else gives it to us.I don't title my books because I am an unknown.



    =200514127" rel="noopener noreferrer">Podcast in Itunes
    Podcast
    with RSS
    How Do You Feel? on myspace.com
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    17 min
  • HDYF 31 Your Hands Are Power Tools
    I'm under the weather in Minnesota. Even though my throat is sore, my heart is true. Positivity is learned. Anti-inflammatory pills for my ankle because I tripped over a stump. When people don't do their job, people fall down and break their ankle. If we want it, it has two possible outcomes: we will not get it or we will. That is not the case. Turn that frown upside down. Your talking makes you feel better. High Intensity Caffienated Barbie. They had nothing and now they're Tanya Tucker. Some people are destined to be where they are because of their God-given ability...or beauty. This world is a puzzle you bought at Wal Mart for 99 cents: it's not hard. I'm talking not to the emotionally freakish. Practice the art of control. With our hands we drive, put money into a slot machine, use a laptop or desktop. Look at your hands. Flip them over. Repeat. These are your power tools and you are your own repairman. Call the repairman to fix your happiness. It's scary that we can fix our own problems. You can get Vitamin K from the sun. Going back to college as an adult. What's it like to see youth and beauty on a college campus and know it's been sucked from you. Let's think of ourselves as little homeless children. They don't get toys, and they're still happy with nothing. I can go to college old. You can wear a black cloak and stand in the back of the room near a wall as if the cloak was hanging on a wall. We want to believe we cannot do things. It's so scary to get yourself out of your scared-ass cocoon. Actors have the hardest job in the world. And actor is not Brooke Sheilds or Jada Pinkett Smith. An actor is auditioning for dinner theater and becoming the man who sells chicken at the opening of act 2 of Guys and Dolls. Jerry Orbach had a difficult childhood. He became a Jehovah's Witness because he never celebrated his birthdays. You can get your Chakras aligned. The things we want are worth the wait. Do it if not for he only reason that it can be done. Prove. Me. Wrong. You are a homeless child who has the capacity to live without toys.




    =200514127" rel="noopener noreferrer">Subscribe in Itunes
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    feelpodcast
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    18 min
  • HDYF 31 Your Hands Are Power Tools
    I'm under the weather in Minnesota. Even though my throat is sore, my heart is true. Positivity is learned. Anti-inflammatory pills for my ankle because I tripped over a stump. When people don't do their job, people fall down and break their ankle. If we want it, it has two possible outcomes: we will not get it or we will. That is not the case. Turn that frown upside down. Your talking makes you feel better. High Intensity Caffienated Barbie. They had nothing and now they're Tanya Tucker. Some people are destined to be where they are because of their God-given ability...or beauty. This world is a puzzle you bought at Wal Mart for 99 cents: it's not hard. I'm talking not to the emotionally freakish. Practice the art of control. With our hands we drive, put money into a slot machine, use a laptop or desktop. Look at your hands. Flip them over. Repeat. These are your power tools and you are your own repairman. Call the repairman to fix your happiness. It's scary that we can fix our own problems. You can get Vitamin K from the sun. Going back to college as an adult. What's it like to see youth and beauty on a college campus and know it's been sucked from you. Let's think of ourselves as little homeless children. They don't get toys, and they're still happy with nothing. I can go to college old. You can wear a black cloak and stand in the back of the room near a wall as if the cloak was hanging on a wall. We want to believe we cannot do things. It's so scary to get yourself out of your scared-ass cocoon. Actors have the hardest job in the world. And actor is not Brooke Sheilds or Jada Pinkett Smith. An actor is auditioning for dinner theater and becoming the man who sells chicken at the opening of act 2 of Guys and Dolls. Jerry Orbach had a difficult childhood. He became a Jehovah's Witness because he never celebrated his birthdays. You can get your Chakras aligned. The things we want are worth the wait. Do it if not for he only reason that it can be done. Prove. Me. Wrong. You are a homeless child who has the capacity to live without toys.




    =200514127" rel="noopener noreferrer">Subscribe in Itunes
    Subscribe
    with RSS
    myspace.com/howdoyou
    feelpodcast
    Produced by Mark Baratelli
    18 min

About How do you Feel? A Self-Help Guru's Quest for Your Brain

From the publisher's feed

Emotional rehabilitator Mark Baratelli gets you from funk to spunk in 20 minutes or less. He's there, he's talking and he's there. Give your mind to him or you will never change. Seriously, loser.…