HUNKS

On August 19th the members of HUNKS descended upon the luxurious Wee Johnny's Irish Pub in Winnipeg's historic Exchange District to record their first live podcast. The event was so hotly anticipated it was chosen by Teghan Beautette as one of the top 5 things to do in Winnipeg! We opened a bunch of gifts from super (4/20 Friendly) fan Andrew Langendorfer and sampled the exotic tastes of Korea! And then we also quickly insult the culinary culture of Korea. Crab chips? Yuck! Fuckin' yuck! But, the butter caramel chips were life changing. Now, I'm tempted to tour South Asia just for the butter-based flavoured chips. Dana Explains Hellraiser. Another classic retelling of a scary movie by Dana Smith. If you haven't seen the movie Hellraiser, then buckle in. Brenda is a bitch, pin head is late to the party, it's a clown car of ghosts, and a ghost writer for Shania Twain is selling mysteries. Yet another hair raising installment of Which Dave Did It. It's a Dave Derby disaster and it's fucking ridiculous! Still can't believe these guys are alive. I hope you enjoy it as much as We're looking forward to recording more in the near future.

We have reached our 30th episode (triple digits)! While you're listening to this episode, if you have a laugh out loud please try locking eyes with someone. Just see where it goes. Could you be one of the 4 people outside the podcast that Matt doesn't HATE talkingto? Dana learned to not be too hard on herself, especially when it comes to performing jokes more than once. We try a new segment on called "Flash Animal Facts with Sam McLean". Does Sam know anything about Leopard Geckos? Do we know anything about them? Can we Internet? We've had so many wonderful emails lately we need to take some time to acknowledge them and (more importantly) workshop our horror movies about Kayaking and Canoes. Settle down everyone! We finally answer the age-old question of what we would teach an alien who is new to Earth and it's also 2001. It ends in a Much Video Dance party. Also, Tayo is still really popular in South Korea. It's the story of a woman. We are happy that Sam did not abandon us as he revealed his 2 Truths and a Lie.

It's here! It's really here! Another episode of the fucking HUNKS Podcast! Our goals this week are bookended by people trying to figure out sitting. We learn some INSANE facts about the Queen of England. Did you know she makes everyone's passports? And she drives a shitty '87 Firebird? Looks like the Royals are at it again. Tim get's pretty namby-pamby with the word of the week. Also, we tackle exactly how to spell the sound that Goofy makes. We kick off the 2nd act with a little Billy Dylan. Dana really get's in explaining the movie Aliens. This is one of the more pressured and expressive explaining of a horror movie. John gets hurt, there's a cat, and Sigourney Weaver is the MOST badass. The creepy alien in a dirty towel nearly wins in the end, but believe it or not, Ripley pulls off a win! This "Which Dave Did It" segment does NOT disappoint! Whether you are yelling at a skinny man or wrapping your hands around a stranger's face - you have lived a life. [Spoiler Alert] A very special guest comes on at the end to reveal which Dave indeed did it.

Episode 034 of the HUNKS Podcast find's the gang dipped deep in thick riffs. Couldn't we live in a world where 'Cheese Gas' wasn't vilified? What you didn't hear around the 4:30 mark was Dana saying Tim's peen was out of his pants. We're so thankful for all of our lovely listeners who put up with Tim's talkin' peen interrupting people. True story: Bruges, Belgium is home to roads that are some the biggest weiner's in the world. Surf the beer tunnels in Belgium with H.U.N.K.S. as Tim shares stories of Beer and Purple Carrots. Congratulations to all of those fancy pants cities with toilets in their basement. This episode also features our first installment of Talkin' Squat: Squat Talk. New segment alert! New segment alert! Quinn Greene guides us on a new game he has created for the podcast called "Quinn Quest". Quinn guides us on a fantastical journey through a nerd world of his own creation. He's loaded it up with trivia, stories, and long-winded introductions (that we all LOVE). Second new segment alert! Bare with us (RAWR!) as we work our way through the first letter we write to our government. We are certainly intending on writing more letters and I promise you we'll get better at writing them.

This special BONUS episode of the HUNKS Podcast was a live broadcast on UMFM airwaves on Tuesday, Oct 18th at midnight. We had a blast doing a special live phone-in version of our show and raise some money for UMFM's annual Pledge-o-Rama. For some reason we insisted that we all do Bernie Sandals impressions. Make sure you donate today to UMFM to keep community radio chugging along!

Episode 035 starts with Tim telling tales of pain, anguish and stupidity. That pain and anguish quickly translates into the other members of H.U.N.K.S. as they try to figure out the logic behind Tim's madness. Dana's goal is to not let anything bother her - good luck, you idiot! "You're like some sort of kaleidoscope of human thought." - Quinn Greene describing Tim Gray. How perfect is that? This week Matt learned about cockroaches, groups of pugs, and 'who's brave enough to fuck me?' We get into wolves! And, most importantly, dogs. Lots of dog talk. Matt is a Jack Russel Terrier, Rory is a St. Bernard, Tim is a 4/20 Friendly Pomeranian, etc. Which Dog do you think we are? Look. We know that we will all eventually witness a major crime and have to testify in court against a family of influence. We're looking forward to a world where Fredrick McNaulty, Todd "Duke" Jones, Randy Cougar-Melloncamp, Theodore "Teddy" Daughtermen, and Van Wood start their own podcast from different corners of the world. We were so heavy on the first 2/3rds of the show that we had to wrap up the 3rd portion without doing one of our classic segments!

In this episode, Dana gives us all the latest on the beautiful life of the perfect weirdo that is Tom Cruise. We learn the word 'mollify' and wax on what it would be like to jump across the world, observing whales and landing horribly. Then we break Toby real good by getting into a hot debate about a world where whales and humans miraculously switched places, a whale-based economy, and a whale-based space race. Finally, Toby hits us with some hard truths (and one lie), about loosing his lunch in the unlikeliest of instances. It's a whale of a 'cast that truly proves, 'In space, no one can hear you groove!'

It's Episode 39 and the H.U.N.K.S. have hit their peak! Well, maybe not right now... Some of them have peaked a long time ago, others are peaking as we speak, and others are ready to peak well into their 30s. Rory is sad to learn that the $1,000 American bill is out of circulation. Who's on the $1,000 you always desperately wondered? Find out here folks! We dicker around with Word of the Week and learn all about Tim's Dickies phase. Next up, we get a second session of Quinn Quest featuring adventurer Matthew Night of Gales! Matthew, a dark elf warlock, finds himself in a real pickle when he is captured by an evil drider (or an evil dryer depending on how you hear it) who engages him in a game of riddles! After Quinn The Wizard gives us a story about his worst work shift ever, Matthew the Warlock wins the day, defeating the sinister dryer forever! In our final segment, Tim lays that truth (and one lie) down on us, regaling us with some never-before-heard stories about his best and worst performances on stage. Show biz ain't easy and Tim has had some real whoppers, show stoppers, and clop coppers out there in the wild world of comedy. It's an episode filled with foreign currency, magical monsters, and on-stage shenanigans you don't wanna miss!

H.U.N.K.S. Podcast turns 40! In this special live episode at Wee Johnny's Irish Pub, things kick off quick as we hash out some of our dad's goals. Then Tim Learns a little about lighthouses in a lack luster fashion, we get another sneak peak into the mind of Tim Gray, and we riff on the left-handedness of polar bears. Then, in Word of The Week, we completely ignore the meaning of Ukase! Next, we quickly rail on "The Parade of Lies"; aka "The Santa Day Parade"; before getting real hands-on with our next segment Dana Explains Puppet Master. Puppet Master is an eye-boner of a groaner 90's B-movie that makes almost no sense save for the epic puppet murders. Dana loves hearing about 90's stop motion animation but hates every other aspect of this straight to video cinematic disaster.In our final segment, we go back to the realm of Quinn Quest and take up the epic journey with Rory Fallis aka Roarer Felix, a half-dragon techno druid. It's Roarer's turn to face a horrendous fantasy monster called a beholder, and to solve some riddles to save his own skin. Will he best the foul beast and win the day? Find out in this fantasy tale featuring dire boars, rabid koalas, and a real life tale of Quinn throwing some poor soul through a glass coffee table! By accident of course!!! (Maybe, sort of...) Come blow out some candles, and smash cake in each other's faces with this 40th episode extravaganza! This episode also features a live commercial by Rumors very own stand-up sensation Ryan Ash!

This is episode 43 of the p'cast and we get raw and real right off the bat in this crude, lude, epi-sude! We start by sharing stories about the rules of engagement when it comes to love and farts. Then we take a golden detour and go on about the times we couldn't quite make it to the porcelain palace. Dana learns us about really rude Roman dental hygiene, and we Fillip on facts in Word of The Week. In our next segment, we finally, FINALLY, get to some fan emails we've been neglecting. Long-time listener, The Dorf (or Andrew Langendorfer) gets right down to business, revealing our views on hypnotism, and the perils of living in Quinn's beard. Next, a message from HUNKS fan Shaun Stewart has us Talkin' Guac (guacamole that is), and we get real deep into Dana's love affair with hot, hot mayo. At last, we give The Dorf some advice on breaking into skateboarding well into your thirties and give the low down on a bunch of shows and events HUNKS has coming down the half-pipe. Tune in your ear parts, load up your best mayo munching gloves, and get ready to Do The Dorf in this crass mish mash of laughs and butt gas!