Ever notice how quick you are to say, “I don’t like X” or “I can’t stand it when people…”? Whether the subject is food or a person’s behavior or how something looks, you probably respond negatively on autopilot. This can be as simple as calling someone an a-hole for cutting you off on the freeway or as damaging as dismissing someone outright because you disagree with something they believe. Hate begets hate so the more you try to banish those unsavory people or situations from your life, the more they crop up.

A hater mentality also allows you to remain in your comfort zone, avoiding what you fear. It leaves you disconnected from yourself because all of your focus is on what you don’t like or disapprove of. It robs you of your own wellbeing. Instead, what if you were to be curious about what you don’t like and why? What if you put proverbial duct tape over your mouth whenever you felt like vocalizing your dislike for someone or something? When you acknowledge you can’t control what is outside of you, you are able to let go and allow for a more peaceful existence. Remember, you get to choose what you focus on and how you respond.