I Have No Idea What I’m Doing

I talk about missing Mom, a photo and video project I’m embarking on which focuses on leaving behind a nice pool of content after I die, and I also talk about skateboarding, my head/neck issue, and what I’d like to do after the eventual end of the pandemic.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

I talk about winter arriving, the grief-related and pandemic-related difficulties of December and January, nine months without Mom, writing, poetry, and Dungeons and Dragons, imposter syndrome, saying no to depression, and the weird ways anxiety manifests.

I mention a poet and a meditation guide by their names. Here are the links to the things I reference in this episode.

Andrew K. Peterson: Good Game

Tara Brach – Embodied Spirit

Also, as always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr 

I go over the week I had leading up to and including the ever-challenging American Thanksgiving. I rode a lovely emotional rollercoaster for most of the week, but I also talk briefly about finishing the NaNoWriMo story, creativity and how I’m trying to focus on that and on being present. Mainly, I just do a lot of missing Mom this week. 

Also, side note: I don't think I introduced the show or said my name at the top. This is still I have no idea what I'm doing, and I'm still Cassie.

I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

I talk about why I’ve still kept this secret, why I’m struggling to tell anyone about it, and I also dive into the dread of the holidays and what I’m doing to combat that. Writing and reading are the big helpers this month, despite still being full of heartache. I discuss the importance of art during hard times, and what book I’m currently reading.

I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

I celebrate the huge win in the USA, and the way the victory does not allow us to un-know the ugliness of our neighbors, and other election-related feels. I talk about eight months without Mom, the way grief is exhausting, the hate I have for myself for useless things, an interview I listened to about grief and writing, and my feelings pre- and post-election. I also talk about writing, reading, and how NaNoWriMo is going. My health garbage from 2019 comes up a little bit.

I swear and talk about heavy topics; you have been warned.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr

I talk about Halloween, friends from Sweden (don’t worry – I don’t mention it, but I took a lot of precautions for COVID in order to safely see them!), learning and not learning from mistakes, pushing myself too far, respecting rest days, picking a starting point for my attempt to figure out how to freelance, my November break from DMing for my friends I run the D&D game for, NaNoWriMo, and the continual dread of the holidays approaching. I also read my prompt response from last week’s contest for Reedsy Prompts. I stumble through it a little, so you can read it here if you want!

For all my prompt responses: this is my Reedsy Prompt Profile

I talk about therapy, medicines, the flu shot, the pandemic, flu season, gun shots. I grumble about the state of politics and the general fusing of politics with entertainment and the frustration and exhaustion of the angry phase of “waking up” from the patriarchy matrix, and the fears I have surrounding medicines and the medical field, anti-depressants/anxiety medications, and that sort of stuff. I talk about grief and Mom, and missing her, and the holidays, and being homesick. I also talk about writing and not having anything to share yet again this episode. While I do not read the story I wrote, I do discuss what I wound up writing for the Reedsy prompt last week. 

I swear and I talk about hard topics; you are now warned.

Thanks for listening.

https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/

I talk about grief, missing Mom, the pandemic, the fullest week I've had this month, and writing, D&D, and the possibility of NaNoWriMo. Feeling a bit run down today, so the editing is light and I probably make a lot of long pauses because tears, lost trains of thought, that sorta stuff. I just didn't have lots of editing in me today. Oh! And I know I probably swear at some point, and just a reminder, my whole thing here is talking about messy topics, so consider this your trigger warning.

Also, here's the link to my Reedsy Prompt Responses profile if you want to see what I've been writing lately. https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/

I talk about missing Mom, the day she died being vivid in my mind and finding solace in not being alone in that, writing/creativity and D&D as life rafts during all of the chaos, guest appearance on my business partner's podcast, still not telling everyone I know about this, yet confessing this exists in a letter to a friend. I also ramble about anxiety attacks related to the sun going down, how I'm working to fix it or navigate dealing with it, and I chatter about some other stuff from therapy. I talk about trigger warnings for myself and what they mean or don't mean, death, and everything under the sun which includes difficult topics to focus on, so consider this your trigger warning.  Also, I swear a lot in general, so I'm sure I've cussed up a storm in here. I definitely remembering dropping the F word several times. 

Also sorry this one is extra long! I don't think they'll be this long in the future.

Oh! Here's a link to my business partner's podcast: https://anchor.fm/derwin-gerald-lester-ii

But maybe don't tell him I sent you, since I still haven't told people about this thing??

I talk about missing mom, a gay wedding, birthdays, seasonal anxiety joining the party, but mostly I ramble about literary criticism and how art is flawed. I also talk about how I'm working to create and shut out the many voices of criticism. I don't talk about wanting to die in this one, which I think is an improvement for my mental health state? Also, here is the promised link to the my profile on the Reedsy prompt website where I'm doing the weekly prompts. Read the stories by me and by the other participants, or join us in doing the prompts, or both. https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/

Also, here we go again: I probably swear more than once, and I think it's apparent that my favorite one is the F one, so now you're warned.