Well, four hours of Paradise per week seems like way too much time to allow very pretty people to “open their hearts” to each other. Can I get an amen? Especially when all they do is drink, lift weights, and sleep in day beds until the sun goes down. I’m looking at you, Joe the Grocer.

So, my mission, and I DO choose to accept it, will be to water down all the nonsense into a handful of entertaining storylines you need to know. For example:

And because watching 240 hours of BIP tends to mess with one’s brain, Some Guy in Austin and I do slide off the rails a few times in this episode. You’ll be happy to hear we discuss in length NSYNC’s “Bye Bye Bye” video and devote way too much time practicing our remedial Spanish.

You’re gonna love it. It’s muy bien. 

EPISODE NOTES:

HERE is the premiere recap of Bachelor in Paradise.

Would you like to listen to the Spotify playlist?

SHOW NOTES:

Subscribe to Podcast: iTunes or Android

Follow Me: Facebook and Instagram, and Twitter

Buy My Books: It’s a Love Story and Why I Hate Green Beans