On our first day of breakfast radio we muse about Ben’s Ian Somerhalder fansite, discover that Vicki would be deadweight on Frodo’s fellowship and investigate Disney’s fascination with mops.

A very festive episode in which we get fat for Guy Fawkes Day, re-enact The Elephant Man as per holiday tradition and observe the Queens chocolate seeking ant army.

A very nostalgic episode in which we absorb our conjoined twin, streak like a ninja and receive a picnic rug for passing our drivers test.

A very hustlin’ episode in which we take trick-or-treating seriously, grow udders and drink ourselves dry and pitch competing faun based game shows.

We propose our idea for a hit new (untelevised) reality show, get disappointed by the fact that no one has impersonated us now that we’re famous and tell Shane to ‘Deal with it!’

We propose that we should’ve proposed another season of the show, we creepily approach people and get our black male rappers confused.

We propose that making an ice-bath is the best way to preserve disembodied skin, all criminals should avoid walking with a limp because Keyser Söze ruined it for the rest of them and that Avril Lavigne's saliva adds value to maple syrup.

We propose that Ben needs a pouch, we play the intro to Heart Shaped Box a few too many times and talk to a sickly Sir Ian McKellen.

We propose a new definition for the term ‘Big Night’, Ben hovers over Vicki in her sleep Paranormal Activity style and we incite a rivalry between Ben’s fans.

We propose that digital clocks shouldn’t wake you up with Tell-Tale Heart like ticking, get turned on by collarbones and make small talk in awkward situations.