Is Our Love ____? with Lola Jean & The Reluctant Sexpert

Stoya. A person who needs no introduction but we're going to attempt it anyway. An internationally celebrated author, activist, actress & advocate for sex worker's rights. An introverted cat lover, a next level book nerd, and a fearless caller of bullshit. An endless seeker of the authentic & creator of sexually explicit media in all forms. Stoya's famously photogenic asshole could be identified in a line-up by millions of porn viewers… and that's made her life simultaneously fascinating and fucking traumatizing. Stephen and Stoya met and fell in love in their 20s. That relationship would come to have strange rippling effects on both of their lives.

The next two episodes of Is Our Love ____? is a uniquely intimate conversation between ex's about mutual shared history, sex, love, life, and how we can all keep trying to improve.

If you'd like advice on sex, love, or relationships you can always email us at [email protected] ... (PS it's worth reminding that you can also email Stoya & her advice column 'How To Do It' at [email protected])

You can find Stoya's explicit media and first 2 issues at Zerospaces.com. Our crossover Podcast episode on Unicorns will be part of the upcoming issue #3. You can also follow her @stoya on twitter and instagram.

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

The recurring musical theme this episode is Innerpartysystem "This Empty Love," (The video mentioned still exists on youtube) Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

In a world that isn't wildly accepting of sexuality, kink, or anything that falls out of heteronormativity can be a scary thing to reveal to folx. Will they accept you? Shame you? Fire you? And if it goes long enough does keeping the secret become the bigger deal? Fetish Fellow is as public a private person can be. As an adored and go-to photo shoot submissive, Fetish Fellow has been in his share of masked displays. The modern day superhero removes his mask to join us to talk about his time in front of the camera as an introvert and rule-follower and what he's learned along the way.

Follow Fetish Fellow on instagram: @fellowfetish

If you're finding yourself in need sex, love or relationship advice... or just some old fashioned digital human contact in quarantined times: Email us at [email protected]

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "You Are My Sexual Connection" by Sexual Harassment Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

This week we ironically tackle threesomes as a twosome. Threesomes are often one of the first boxes on people's sexual bucket lists, but are they all they're cracked up to be? Stephen and Lola weigh the pro's and con's on adding a third, and trade some of their best (and worst) threesome tales. What makes a good threesome? What does a 'unicorn' mean? And what you need to know before you decide to have a threesome. Consider this your no-holds-bared, non-romanticized straight shooting guide to threesomes.

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is Against All Logic: "Fantasy" Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

This week we take a break from our social distancing to talk about something other than coronavirus. To bring up spirits we decided it would be a great time to discuss personal finances! Totally kidding... we just recorded this episode pre-virus outbreak. In all seriousness, finances are a tricky topic regardless of global pandemic, and what a better time to reassess our relationship with sex, love and money than now. Lindsay Goldwert, author of Bow Down: Lessons from Dominatrixes on How to Get Everything You Want joins us to talk about cash, workplace power dynamics, and if pro dommes hold the answers to getting what you want in business.

Follow Lindsay Goldwert on insta: @lindsay_goldwert, Her podcast SPENT on all platforms & her book BOW DOWN now in stores & digital platforms everywhere

If you're finding yourself with unexpected quarantine time and need sex, love or relationship advice... or just some old fashioned digital human contact: Email us at [email protected]

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "Unsatisfied" by The Replacements because I've got a case of the pandemic *fuckits* and have been listening to the Replacements. Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

This week, Is Our Love welcomes the gals of the "Welcome To My Vagina" podcast into *our* podcast vagina which is probably... anal? From hashtag#wellness-ing everything, to the reasons why we faked or continue to fake orgasms, Jessy & Rebekah trade genital war stories. We are overcoming our genital shame in this rainbow bright choose-your-own-genital-experience buffet.

Listen to Jessy & Rebekah on Welcome To My Vagina (on all pod platforms) and find their other writing, videos, etc on welcometomyvagina.com

Questions? Advice? Rainbows? Email us at [email protected]

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is Jan & Dean "Pocket Full of Rainbows" Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

This week we live in the taboo, the messy, and the sometimes woo woo. That's right: We're on the rag, riding the crimson wave….we're BLEEDING love. Valarie Merced (aka The Blood Queen) schools us on why it's important for her to bleed on her lovers. From seeing her mother's menstruation to the safeties and physiological response during menstruation, this episode is for people with vulvas AND those who enjoy them. Hell, how often do we get to talk about period and period sex? Strap on your Thinx and your Diva cups, it's gonna get red. PLUS we challenge you to post a selfie with a "Simba" blood mark on your forehead & use #isourlovebleeding. Will this be the next ice bucket challenge? ...probably not. But... why not?

Follow Val's magazine PRECIPICE on instagram: @precipicemagazine

We love hearing from you for questions, blood stories, or advice: Email us at [email protected]

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "Risk It" by Austra Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

This week on Is Our Love we explore the positive side of being positive. Advocate Philipp Speigel shares his personal stories from reliving his HIV diagnosis, depression, and processing to ultimately becoming a speaker and advocate through owning his positive status. Where it was once thought of as a death sentence, treatment and management for HIV has come leaps and bounds. Do you know what undetectable means? How educated are you on HIV transmission? How often are you getting tested snd how often should you? Take it from Lola and probably Schoolhouse Rock: knowledge is power and getting tested is easy and affordable (and often free.) For testing resources in your area just google your local government funded sexual health clinic or Planned Parenthood.

You can find more information about Philipp's art & advocacy at philipp-spiegel.com and on Instagram: @ongoingviral

We love hearing from you for questions, resources, or advice: Email us at [email protected]

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "Sacred Scales" by Light Beams Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

Between breakups, makeups and all that unfolds in between we've all had our uglier moments. Lorrae of Slutty Girl Probs fame walks us through the best of times and the worst of times and how learning from those moments has helped her grow and learn more about herself and the types of relationships she needs. Lorrae and Stephen bond over seeing themselves as the problem child in the aftermath of a breakup, while Lola questions why most people tend to always make a villain out of their ex. PLUS Lorrae discusses how understanding her mental health takes part in how she processes breakups and look for future partners.

Do you have questions or wanna share all your fucked up breakup feels? Email us at [email protected]

Follow Lorrae and hire her for coaching at sluttygirlproblems.com and on Instagram: @sluttygrlprobs and @lorraejo

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "Door" by Nice As Fuck. Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

Move over stoner comedies and Bob Marley posters, cannabis has a new sheriff in town…. Sophie St Thomas! This week on Is Our Love we have the most responsible conversation about drugs with the famed author of Finding Your Higher Self and upcoming books Sex Witch and The Little Book of CBD for Self Care. Sophie takes us through her journey from her decision to become sober to her battle with PTSD, flashbacks and her journey to healing through Cannabis and other substances. PLUS we get into some witchy shit and Stephen adds 50 black candles to his amazon shopping cart.

Are you stoned and want to email us with your sex questions? Email us at [email protected]

Follow Sophie St. Thomas on instagram and twitter: @thebowiecat

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

Music this week is Pure Magic 'I Get High' and Bongripper 'Satan' Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com

We're back from a *brief* hiatus to bring you the first episode of 2020. We're getting all kinds of heady dissecting the phrasing, attire and spaces we frequent and what makes then "queer" "kinky" "sexy" etc…. How do we react to each of these individually and how do they influence or affect our behavior. Kinky queer architect Vanilla Honey shares her kink journey from her first experience with latex to her fantasy of designing the minimalist dungeon of your dreams. We question what is normal and why are we so concerned with it?

Do you have questions or feelings--ALL THE FEELINGS--that need attention? Email us at [email protected]

Follow Vanilla Honey on Instagram: @vanilla.honey

------~ Follow us on social media ~------- The show: @isourlove_____ Lola Jean: @lolajeandotcom Classes & Instruction: lolajean.com Stephen Penta: @thereluctantsexpert

This weeks' end of episode song is "Meticulous Bird" by Thao & The Get Down Stay Down. Our official theme songs are composed & recorded by our good friends at hyperballadmusic.com