So many of us think fulfillment is just on the other side of X. I’ll be happy when I get married, am able to travel, get that awesome job, buy a house, have a few kids, etc. But how often do you put energy toward what you think you want, get it and realize you’re no happier? Then you set a new finish line, arrive and still find something is missing. Focusing on a destination comes from a state of lack.

This happens all the time when we compare ourselves to others. So-and-so has a vacation home, high-powered job, beautiful spouse… if I had those things I’d be happy too! But you aren’t walking around inside that person. Maybe he/she is filled with anxiety, drowning in debt and has family issues. You have no clue because the things outside of us don’t necessarily correlate to what’s inside (in fact they often don’t). You probably know all of this intellectually, and yet I see people struggle with it all the time.

Newsflash: there is no destination. The journey is here, now, the present, and you get to choose how you participate. You can struggle and swim upstream, of you can accept where you are and surrender to what comes next. When we judge ourselves and think we don’t have enough, it’s because we don’t feel safe. We think if we surrender to life, something bad might happen. Better to look at those who SEEM to have it figured out, and just do what they do. Unfortunately that doesn’t work. Instead, acknowledge your inner judge, accept where you are and enjoy the journey with all its twists and turns. Fulfillment comes from accepting you’ll never get there because there IS no there.