[[:encoded, "Gunmen is a movie with Christopher Lambert and Mario Van Peebles. Sometimes dumb guys go to movies like this because the word \"gun\" is in the title. Such is the case with Todd, but it really doesn't matter because Jason and Todd mostly talk about The Revenant, the recent works of Bill Murray, Donald Trump, and of course Jason reads the latest literary work from Todd's kid, Colby. Happy War on Christmas, everyone!"]]

Sheena: Queen of the Jungle is a movie about a white lady who can talk to African animals. She takes a lot of naked showers in a waterfall. It's for kids. Jason and Todd talk all the way through the 80s masterpiece with special guest Susan Tankersley who came all the way across the country with her DVD just to torture the boys. Given that she is the only listener and actually on the podcast, who the hell will actually listen to this?

[[:encoded, "Sheena: Queen of the Jungle is a movie about a white lady who can talk to African animals. She takes a lot of naked showers in a waterfall. It's for kids. Jason and Todd talk all the way through the 80s masterpiece with special guest Susan Tankersley who came all the way across the country with her DVD just to torture the boys. Given that she is the only listener and actually on the podcast, who the hell will actually listen to this?"]]

[[:encoded, "Cruel Gun Story is the actual name of an actual movie featuring an actual actor who had cheek implants. You read that right. Doesn't matter that much, though, because Jason and Todd talk about internet police, alien invasions, and other pointless nonsense instead of focusing on the movie in front of them. Which is the whole concept of this podcast. Which is not really a concept at all. Which is a word I just started three different sentences with."]]

[[:encoded, "The Wicker Man is a movie that was a movie before it was a movie with Nic Cage, but Jason really wanted to watch the Nic Cage one. This may be the happiest Jason has ever sounded, ever. Todd is not as happy because he is recovering from a Sunday bender, but at least he gets to see Cage screaming about cartoon bees. Jason reads a story about zombies and one of his reviews. Todd tries not to puke. This one's for Susan! We love you!"]]

[[:encoded, "Sword of Justice is a movie with a samurai cop who likes to beat up his unnaturally large junk with heavy rods and whatnot. Doesn't really matter, because Jason reads from Todd's son's horror story, they talk about everything from the use of rape in movies to what Japanese movies they like the best, and then at the end...surprise guest! Listen or get other more important things done."]]

[[:encoded, "Island of Death is an absolutely disgusting piece of inhumane garbage, and Jason and Todd sit down to watch every minute of it. In their first ever official segment, Jason reads the work of Todd's son, Colby. It's a horror story about miniature alien people. Also discussed are deeply offensive jokes, bad acting, and thrill kill murderballers. Did we mention that this movie is disgusting?"]]

[[:encoded, "The Perfect Storm is this episode's journey the boys must take. They talk about their love for William Fichtner, and break down the work of Wolfgang Peterson as well as talk about jet lag and fiction made by children. An hour in, Jason realizes the movie he picked was much too long. Luckily, because of a perfect storm of technical problems, Jason is super happy when they have to cut the movie short...a first for the show!"]]

[[:encoded, "Terminal Velocity is a movie about skydiving hijinks... Holy crap, we just realized these two yahoos have been doing this idiotic thing for over two years. Wowza! In celebration, Jason and Todd talk about Charlie Sheen, memorials, and one of those Baldwin brothers. But in the end, Todd still can't understand why Jason doesn't love the new Mad Max Movie. Soooooo weird."]]

[[:encoded, "Panic in the Year Zero is a very old movie about nuclear devastation in Los Angeles. Basically, a family drives around, stopping at a bunch of stores to stock up for the post-apocalypse. It's right up Todd's alley, but surprisingly was picked by Jason. Doesn't really matter, though, because they mostly talk about other things."]]