Jerk Practice

Stuck at home,

In stormy weather.

Relax your dome,

With padded leather.

Ain’t the Greeks you slaved,

Though they be tall.

The day is saved,

By the Dil Doul!

“The ol’ Chindo’ll give you six feet.”

#Olisbos #JoeAverage #Snakes #PaddedLeather

Let’s all petition that fat-cat pig-banker to take off his diamond pinky-ring, pick up his programming-thing, and get to work on Snakestrisss©®™!!!

Well we’re still in this thing Jerks, but fear not because “cobra-meat will cure anything.”

“Wuhan is the Watertown of China.”

#StarWarsSoup

Remember “Clippy” from Microsoft? Well, he ain’t got shit on this one…

We hope everyone is staying safe and smart out there, and has as much time on their hands as this episode clearly illustrates.

“Bisexual?”

“Oh no no no sir. Better.”

#HawkingTrumpsGod #HawkingHeartsJP

We hope you are all staying responsible and safe during this bonkers time of distress. AND, for all of those that are hoarding TP, we hope you get “white lung.”

Hey there man,

I’m Corony Tony,

Ask me ‘bout Co-One-Nine,

I ask for more bologna.

That’s the meat,

With the Italian name,

You ask me where I’m from,

I must refrain.

Because, I’m a man,

Of no place,

Whether is Wuhan, China,

Or outer-space.

‘Cause all I see is a tower of dreams,

And a pair of white butt-cheeks,

Needing Cream in-betweens.

“Different elements of medical.”

#BickleyWarren

Hey we’re in the juicy thick of it now folks. In this time of quarantine and constant change please remember We Love You and There’s Nothing You Can Do About it.

P.S. You’ll probably being hearing a lot more Jerk in the near future, and unfortunately that means a lot, a lot, a lot more Corony Tony!

“We just broke the internet.”

#UnitStuff #HerbertFluver

The Jerks are bringing some vigiLAWNte justice to this episode as they discuss the politics of the upcoming election and equipment barns.

As fellow Sodcasters of Chasten B., all we can say is “the grass is always greener on the boner of the owner.” Yes and?..

“Go back to lawn school and do something with yer life!”

#Harvestard

This one comes full circle from Dr. Pleasonings, to Do It Yourself Doritos, to mustard baths, to LAWson’s Creek.

Yeah, you read that title right (maybe) - This is a direct invite to Mayor Tony Husband to come join in the blank-slate conversation about a late 80’s drama that none of us have ever seen.

“What many people don’t know is that the last signer of the Declaration of Independence was a beat-boxing Sprite machine.”

#SizzleCokes

It’s the 2020 North v South Dunk Contest!!!

Join a couple 2020 Civil War dads as they grouse, get meat drunk, and DUNK (but not).

“I’ve been eating as if Sam Elliott were playing Andrew Jackson.”

#VoteHot #VoteHusk

Alright you Jerks, it’s time for another JP Soup-side Chat…

The Jerks talk Ted Bundy’s famous jumps, Presidential smells, and the hit new crossover “Pegsanne”

In Unison: “Lyndon Bundy Johnson!”

#RichBundy

Join the Jerks as they discuss Poopi, Grambo, and the morning noose!

Just get in the bunker ya skunkers! This is a good one!

“Oh Emilio Estevez is KING FINK in everything.”

“I ain’t payin’ beer prices for soda!”

#MorningBrew #MorningNoose #PoopitheDad