Welcome back to Jonah Asks. My brother Ben loves baseball. He passed that love on to me. Or should I say I was indoctrinated at a very young age. Either way, I love baseball, too. In June and July of 1998, we went on an 18,000 mile, 40-42 day road trip around North America and saw thirty major league baseball games, one at each stadium. In this episode, we reflect on that trip, baseball fandom, brotherhood, and how memory works. Hope you enjoy. 

"All About the Ben"Welcome back to Jonah Asks. Ben Sherman was a high school friend who I also worked and lived with for a couple years in 2002-03. It was great to reconnect with him after a decade or so. Ben has taught philosophy and now works in the non-profit world helping people in workforce development. Ben is thoughtful, compassionate and at times, quite funny. Thanks for listening!Timestamps:0:02 Digestion and Middle Age0:05 Arlington, Massachusetts"The theater crowd at Arlington High School was just...deeply strange. They had their own pagan icon: the sacred oar. Every year, after the final performance, there would be a sacrifice to the sacred oar. My freshman year, they had bought a full-size dead squid from a butcher shop...and it got weirder after that."0:13 The Coin-Flip: Oberlin vs BrandeisBen had to decide between going Oberlin and Brandeis. His dad had left it up to him entirely. At the last minute, he was about to flip a coin. His dad sat down with him and they made a list of pros and cons. It was still a tie. So he flipped a coin. And ended up at Brandeis, in Waltham, MA.  0:17 Experiencing Different Sides of Arlington - Surviving High School: bullying and Social Life, Finding Real Friends, Embracing Weirdness and the Rocker Aesthetic"In the mid-90s, Arlington was right on the edge of gentrification. You said there were different Arlingtons. People who ran the school board would talk about an out-an-out clash between old Arlington and new Arlington and we were right in the middle of it. We were not a ritzy town, we were not a working class town, we were both things at once. That caused some weird splits and polarization."Ben: "In my experience, the portion of the school community that prioritized toughness and toxic masculinity...in a lot of cases, representing the young side of a working class that was being elbowed out of where their families had lived for years, was this hostile force. For me, it was having people randomly gay-bash you. Having people threaten violence."0:24 Identity: Weirdness and Agency0:29 Employment - Ben Works in Workforce DevelopmentThe fight for progress. Employment numbers, opportunities and low wages.0:40 Family and GrievingBen's mom died of cancer when he was 8. He was the oldest of two boys. His dad remarried a few years later. Reflecting back on that time, Ben remembers when he was an early teen, thinking about how few memories he had from the year or two after his mom died. "It was a memory hole even at a time when it was surprising for it to be a memory hole."0:50 Meeting Step-Mom"It was as smooth and warm a step-mother introduction to the family as I'm aware of." Seeing Dad cry for the first time.0:54 Mortality, Trust and PsychologyHow we cope with childhood and how memory works.1:00 Polyamory: Ethical Non-monogamyBen explains his definition of polyamory and his experience in relationships.1:11 Younger People and the Problem of Endless Options1:16 Fatherhood as Seen From Afar1:25 Generations, Trust, Intimacy and Too Many Options1:35 Waltham, MA, Communal Living in 2002Ben and Jared Make a Vague Plan"Let's find collective housing so we're paying a lot less per room right out of college."Internet cables split ten ways. "You had people who were individually not really competent to run their own lives, but you put them together, you had a pretty good overlapping skill-set."1:45 Bugaboo Creek Steak House"It never could decide if it wanted to be Chuck E. Cheese or a dive-bar. The attempt to be both at once was pretty weird. (While serving steak)."A low-budget Applebee's supposedly in the Yukon. 1:48Student Debt, College and Connections1:52Existential QuestionsThe future of higher education, the future of the planet and jobs.1:55The Cost of Living, Internet AvailabilityAppreciationssongs:Weezer “In the Garage”Soundgarden “Black Hole Sun”

Welcome back to Jonah Asks. Meet Luke Tozour. A wonderful human with a keen sense of how sounds work together to create music. A devoted father and partner. A compassionate fellow.

Opening

How Luke and Jonah met: a park in El Cerrito, California, with our two year-old girls.

0:07

Pandemic parenting

Caution-Taped playgrounds

0:11

Balance

Finding balance as a primary parent with work and family in flexible work

0:16

Winter Before the Pandemic: 18 months and another world ago

0:18

Moving: New Jersey to Pittsburgh to Boston to LA

0:21

Music Engineering: LA music scene, working and learning.

Luke was nominated for a Grammy Award while working on Katy Perry's 2008 album "One of the Boys"

0:27

Recording Process: One take versus many takes

0:31

Luke’s production work on OK Go’s new educational project, put together during the pandemic.

https://okgo.net/alltogethernow/

“Produce like a Pro” – YouTube series with Warren Huart

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpyUGZeMUtOvt57UACw3H2g

0:37

First Lines: Songs and Stories

We talk about the importance of first lines.

0:40

Tension and Release in Music

2001: A Space Odyssey https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwxYiVXYyVs

0:41

Searching for Silence

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5djwK3DaZV0

0:46

Parenting: Patience and Communication with a Four Year-old

“This is developmentally appropriate.” Remembering to understand this is temporary and expected.

1:00

Economy, Middle Class and Compassion

1:08

Appreciations

If you'd like to support the podcast directly:

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

Thanks for Listening and Be Safe,

Jonah

Welcome Back to Jonah Asks. Meet Carlo: a broad thinker and motivator, a father, a married gay man, and a great conversationalist. Carlo grew up in the Philippines and came to New York City at 18. Carlo and I are both dads of four year-old girls who attend the same preschool in the Bay Area. This was an invigorating and thoughtful talk.

If you're inspired and motivated by Carlo and interested in working with him, go to www.carloparsons.com

Topics we discuss:

*working online

*parenting

*youth in Philippines

*English fluency/accent

*family--birth order

*large families

*dancing

*identity formation

*attention

*motivation

*social media

*politics

*clarity of thought

*personal mission

Thanks for Listening,

Jonah

.

Welcome Back to Jonah Asks.

This was a really enjoyable interview. Martha Grover has created zines, written books, collected drawings, illustrations and many other forms of expression. Martha doesn't get hung up on the judgment of others and has been creating stuff for over 20 years.

Find Martha's books and zines:

https://antiquatedfuture.com/artist/martha-grover

http://www.perfectdaybooks.com/shop

It was a pleasure to dive into conversation with Martha. We went back and forth telling stories, while discussing the following topics:

*creative writing (memoir, essay, fiction, poetry, fantasy)

*the process of creating

*how books/authors are taught

*attention economy

*ADD

*audiobooks

*television

*mental health/medication/depression

*family dynamics

*homeschooling

*fundamentalist religion

*schools as institutions

*marriage

*relationships

*health

*politics and activism

If you'd like to support the podcast directly:

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

Don't hesitate. Follow your instincts. Express yourself. Ignore the judgments of others...but keep your ears, eyes, heart and mind open.

Thanks for listening to Jonah Asks.

Share, rate, and subscribe as you wish.

Welcome back to Jonah Asks.

Well...I did it. I interviewed my Mom. Deep in my gut, I knew I needed to do this interview when I started this project...and I waited nine months and 27 episodes because I knew it would be complicated.

I love my mom. I appreciate what my mom did for my brother and I growing up. Our relationship has never been simple. Childhood was often tense and anxious and life was difficult for Mom. Teaching second grade and raising two young boys on her own was difficult. Mom balanced our home life with teaching and also being involved in our schools in Arlington and remaining involved in the school system where she taught, in Newton. A strong individual, Mom is now Grammy on Zoom, still doing aerobics (on Zoom these days) at 75 years-old, and still sorting through her endless boxes.

This interview was an important and cathartic one for me, and she thought it came out pretty well, though "a bit rambly." I reminded her it was a conversation, not an outline.

Topics we discuss:

*education

*teaching philosophy (focusing on individual traits in order to encourage and support learning of each student)

*asking for support (or not)

*routines

*writing

*childhood memories -- Washington DC suburbs in the 1940s and early 1950s

*Helen and Earl (mom's parents/my grandparents)

*maintaining joy, wonder and delight

*meeting my father in college

*getting married and divorced

*single-parenting

*choosing NOT to remarry

*the pleasure of sorting

*relationship conflict

*divorce and children: psychology

*family dynamics after divorce

*appreciations

***

Thanks for listening. I'm glad I did this interview. Sometimes the hardest things are the most necessary.

If you'd like to support the podcast directly, click here:

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

Enjoy springtime!

Jonah

Welcome back to Jonah Asks. Meet Mark. A dedicated musician and educator, Mark is now a school administrator and an all-around thoughtful and funky gentleman. I met Mark about fifteen years ago, teaching at Jefferson High School in Daly City. Our paths have crossed again in the last year in the adult school environment. For that I'm grateful.

In this episode, Mark talks about:

*growing up with religion

*life travels from Virginia to Arkansas to the Bay Area

*life on the road as a touring musician

*San Francisco over the last two decades.

We also discuss:

*political activism

*religious hypocrisy

*education

*creativity

*identity (work vs everything else)

Check out Mark's music at http://www.hollinsandhollins.com/

To support the podcast, share, rate and subscribe.

Or you can buy me a virtual coffee here.

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

As always, thanks for listening and be safe.

This is temporary,

Jonah

Welcome back to Jonah Asks. Meet Karsten. Dedicated to environmental justice, Karsten is a passionate and thoughtful human who thinks about the durability of new energy policy. Karsten is a husband, a father of two and an occasional piano man.

Topics we discuss:

*piano

*Environment

*Growing up in the central valley of California

*Geography

*Masculinity

*Justice Movements

*Sustaining Activism

*Climate Crisis

*Biden Administration Climate Goals

*Parenting

Organizations to Support:

Donate to the Indigenous Environmental Network www.ienearth.org

Donate to the Sunrise Movement www.sunrisemovement.org

Donate to Fair Fight www.fairfight.com

Donate to the Equal Justice Initiative eji.org

Redeem your aluminum cans and use that money to donate.

Okay, enough preaching.

To support the podcast directly, share it with others, subscribe to it or donate at Buy Me a Coffee.

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

I appreciate all of you for listening!

Jonah

Welcome back to Jonah Asks. This episode holds extra meaning for me and I hope it will for you as well. My high school guidance counselor was Mr. D'Antona. He was a beloved figure at Arlington High School, where he worked for over 40 years and was a positive influence on so many teenagers lives. I was one of those teens. During a tumultuous personal time in 10th grade, Vin's office was a refuge for me. His open-door policy allowed me to catch my breath over the course of a few months when life felt overwhelming and high school was a place I wanted to escape. This interview is wonderful because Vin (now Vincenzo) is as open-hearted and unguarded as any 80 year-old I've ever met. He's lived a full and satisfying life and he has survived life's unending obstacles while remaining optimistic. Thanks to my Mom staying in touch with Vin over the years, I was able to set up the interview over Zoom.

Topics we discuss:

*Growing up in Somerville and Everett (Massachusetts) in the 40s and 50s.

*family dynamics

*psychology

*teaching

*becoming a high school counselor

*The 60s

*social movements

*impact of War on mental health

*Vietnam

*Italian family

*Polish family

*depression

*bullying

*mental health

*community

*grieving

*therapy

*empathy

*weight

*hiking

*retirement

*COVID

*connections

If you enjoyed this, please share the episode, subscribe to the podcast, and reach out to people you know who may be going through turbulent times.

If you'd like to support the podcast directly:

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

Thanks for listening. This is temporary,

Jonah

Welcome back to Jonah Asks. If you don't find baseball interesting, this isn't for you. This episode is dedicated to Major League Baseball's American League East. Over these 20 minutes, I'll dive into each of the five AL East teams and talk about each team's most pressing concerns as we head into Opening Day next week.

Jonah Asks will be back with another interview next week.

Timestamps:

Baltimore Orioles 02:00

Boston Red Sox 03:40

New York Yankees 08:20

Tampa Bay Rays 11:30

Toronto (Dunedin) Blue Jays 15:19

To support the podcast, please share and subscribe

.

If you'd like to donate a coffee, that's always nice, too.

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/jonahasks

Thanks for listening.