Wanting something from someone in attachment at a deeper level and it never happens—perhaps for a few minutes, but it is never consistent.

Waiting for a train that never shows up. Like a secret hope or believing this person has some sort of gift to give you. It never comes. Even if it does come it doesn't fix it. The emptiness is still there and usually, because we choose what will not fill us, we feel worse—we feel invalidated. We have that idea that we are not enough or good enough—some limiting belief, which we are trying to prove true…a belief that invalidates us as a person.

We cause all of our own grief, but believe it is the outside circumstances which make us feel invalidated. Only you can do that for yourself.

None of this has nothing to do with logic. It is wanting either what I can't have or it's having a situation in which there is little progress—you count breadcrumbs as progress and you believe its the other person holding back, you don’t think you’re part of what is creating the feeling inside.

Leading to the feeling of wanting to grab onto them and bring them closer, when deep down you would freak if they did get closer….its much easier to find validation that you are not okay, that something is wrong with you and just by having this relationship it satisfies the case you’ve built against yourself.