Even if you agree with someone much of the time, you don’t see everything the same way. There is no objective reality; it’s always colored by your childhood, experiences and biases. Yet you probably expend time and energy trying to get people to see things from your perspective. Why do people need to see the world the same way you do? You can send a text to five different people and they may ALL have a different idea of what it means. Nothing is objective. Your view of the world only belongs to you.

An example of this is someone not approving of your partner. Maybe your brother doesn’t think he/she is “good enough” for you. He ignores your partner or makes snide comments behind his/her back. You, on the other hand, think your partner is wonderful and can’t understand what the issue is. The thing is, your brother’s opinion says more about him than it does about your partner (or about you and your choice of partner). It’s about his view of life and underlying beliefs. Trying to convince him of your partner’s amazing qualities is futile.

Everyone sees things differently, and that’s ok. It is difficult for people to accept because we want to believe our perspective is the right one, but there is no right or wrong; your opinion is yours and only yours. Ask yourself why you place so much importance on someone else’s opinion. Is it triggering something you don’t accept about yourself, or that you don’t want to feel? Instead of trying to change someone’s mind, look at it as an opportunity to address what you’re avoiding in yourself.