If I Were a Rich Man (Jan Peerce from 1964 "The Fiddler on the Roof")
(Tevye)
"Dear Lord, you made many, many poor people.
I realize, of course, that it's not a shame to be poor.
But it's no great honor either!
So, what would have been so terrible if I had a small fortune?"
** If I were a rich man, Ya ba Deebe Deebe, Deebe Deebe Deebe Deebe dum
All day long i'd biddy biddy bum / if i were a wealthy man
I wouldn't have to work hard / Ya ba deebe deebe, deebe deebe deebe deebe dum
If I were a biddy biddy rich / Aidle diddle Didle didle man
I'd build a big tall house with rooms by the dozen / Right in the middle of the town
A fine tin roof with real wooden floors below
There would be one long staircase just going up / And one even longer coming down
And one more leading nowhere, just for show
I'd fill my yard with chicks and turkeys and geese and ducks / for the town to see and hear
Squawking just as noisily as they can
And each loud "chick" and "squawk" and "honk" and "quack" / would land like a trumpet on the ear
As if to say "here live s a wealthy man"
**
I see my wife, my Golde, looking like a rich man's wife / with a proper double-chin
Supervising meals to her heart's delight
I see her putting on airs and strutting like a peacock / Oh what a happy mood she's in
Screaming at the servants, day and night
The most important men in town would come to fawn on me
They would ask me to advise them / like a Solomon the Wise
"If you please, Reb Tevye" "Pardon me Reb Tevye"
Posing problems that would cross a rabbi's eyes
And it won't make one bit of difference / if I answer right or wrong
When you're rich / they think you really know
If I were rich, I'd have the time that I lack / to sit in the synagogue and pray
And maybe have a seat by the Eastern wall
And I'd discuss the holy books with the learned men, seven hours every day
That would be the sweetest thing of all
**
Lord who made the lion and the lamb
You decreed I should be what I am
Would it spoil some vast eternal plan?
If I were a wealthy man
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