Ladies Who Lunch

This week, we're talking about that dreaded question that enters our mind in times of anxiousness: "what if?" Worriers think that worrying helps them to prepare for every possible outcome, but in reality, it interferes with problem solving. Our worries may seem specific: “What if I lose my job?” “What if I never fall in love?” -- but the consequences that we’re really worried about stay vague because we never think past the “what if?” Other times, "what if?" questions can be about feelings of regret. You want more than anything to be able to rewind time and get a do-over. You’ve replayed scenarios over and over in your head, thinking of all the things you could have done or said. We're talking about our own anxieties and regrets and what's worked for us. We also answer letters from listeners who are trapped in their heads, constantly repeating to themselves... what if I go for it? What if things were different?

PS. Thanks to True Religion for sponsoring LWL! Use the code LWL for 20% off a pair of jeans! + Thanks to LegacyBox for supporting our podcast. Go to LegacyBox.com/LWL to get 40% off your first order.

Letting go of something is complex. It can be from a relationship, a home, a job, an idea about yourself and who you are. Just because something was right for you in the past, doesn’t mean it still is. You discover more about who you are and what you want out of life, and then you realize there are deliberate changes you need to make to keep up with the changes happening around you and within you. In this episode, Cat shares how she needs to re-home her dog -- that change has been a really hard decision, but ultimately it's one she knows she has to make. We also answer letters from listeners who are having trouble moving forward: one from a breakup and one from a dream job that isn't working anymore. The more we can accept each moment as it is, the less we suffer. Making the decision to let it go also means accepting you have a choice to let it go.

PS. Thanks to FabFitFun for sponsoring our pod! Go to fabfitfun.com and use the code LUNCH for $10 off your first box.

This week, we're talking about how we deal with sexism from people we love: how it relates to people who mean well but may be ignorant, how to navigate through conversations with people who are actually sexist and oppressive, and how to deal with a lack of respect for people who are complacent with sexist people. At some point in every woman’s life, she will face sexism somewhere - in a relationship, in a workplace, walking down the street. We are all part of social systems or environments where women face hostility and oppression because they’re women in a man's world. Navigating sexism can be difficult, but there's another level added when it's coming from the people closest to you. The only way we’re going to change anti-woman culture is if we have each other’s backs.

PS. Thanks to RXBAR for supporting Ladies Who Lunch! Get 25% off your first order at RXbar.com/lwl with the promo code LWL. Thanks to FabFitFun for sponsoring our pod! Go to fabfitfun.com and use the code LUNCH for $10 off your first box.

This week, we're talking about change. Whether a relationship starts or ends, you're moving, you have got a new job, or you've lost someone you love, change (whether it's good or bad) causes stress. You never know exactly what you're going to get, which often frightens us. When we experience the world or ourselves in a certain way for an extended period of time, we develop core beliefs that make up what we think life is supposed to be. We tend to see change as a loss rather than just as part of an inevitable conclusion. Ingrid shares what it was like when her life changed after her father's unexpected passing and the grief that came with it. We also answer a letter from a listener who has recently come out as a trans boy and is now having a hard time accepting what his gender identity means in terms of accepting his sexuality. Feeling shocked by change can be the most significant feeling in a new experience, but being aware that you’re probably going to feel overwhelmed, anxious and exhausted can help you to prepare for it. PS - Thanks to LegacyBox for supporting LWL. Go to LegacyBox.com/LWL to get 40% off your first order. Thanks to FabFitFun for sponsoring our pod! Go to fabfitfun.com and use the code LUNCH for $10 off your first box.

This week, we're talking about competition. For some people, competition forces you to give your best. Having that challenge right on your heels pushes you to run faster, work harder and think deeper. You can also learn from the successes and failures of other people. Our insecurities become stronger whenever we experience disappointments and challenges in our personal and professional lives. It's important to acknowledge this pain and address it. We're diving into our own competitive natures and talking about how competition and comparison affect us on a daily basis. What can you learn from competition? Is “ignoring the competition” ever really doable? How can you handle competition at work or school? Competition will always be there, but it's important to free yourself of negative energy so you can be your best self.

This week, we're spreading the love. As people who create content for a living, we want to share some love and appreciation for the TV shows, podcasts, movies and content creators we are into right now. Sometimes it's good for the soul to take a break from the world around you and indulge in some feel-good, interesting, or inspiring stories. Note: We discuss minor plot points in this episode, so here's a small spoiler alert!

This week, we're talking about celebrities and the desire to know all about them. Why do we, as a culture, value fame over almost everything else? The celebrity serves as both an object of worship and of disgust, and all of this falls into the arc of fame. Thanks to social media platforms, it’s easier than ever for people to gain fame. A large amount of followers can launch someone into stardom with little effort, sometimes even by accident! Just as quickly, celebrities can disappear from the limelight for a multitude of reasons. Fame has become a quickly changing facet of our culture because we have so many ways to connect with the world. We also answer a letter from a listener who is worried her fangirling might cross the line into obsession.

So many of the letters we get in our inbox are about love, so we decided to dedicate an entire episode to them! We're talking about what it's like to crave "the chase", how to appear more approachable when you're independent, long distance relationships and much more. A listener opens up to us about her bisexuality and how her upbringing may have stifled her freedom to explore it -- now, her marriage to her husband is stable but sexless. We also answer a letter from a listener who isn't sure what kind of relationship she should have with an ex whom she treated badly. As we get closer to Valentine's Day, the ins and outs of love are in the air - use this time to reflect on your feelings and remember to be patient with yourself and those you love.

P.S. Thanks to RXBAR for supporting Ladies Who Lunch. Get 25% off your first order at RXbar.com/LWL with the promo code LWL.

This week is all about judgment. We are all inundated with explicit judgments, like the number of likes, faves, retweets, positive and negative comments on our social media. People who interpret their worth from things like the approval and attention of others are especially vulnerable to depression, especially in this environment saturated with judgment. We're talking about how we deal with judgment and criticism in our daily lives. Ingrid and Cat share some things they've done to dive into compassion and stop judging others. We can't always control the adversity we experience in our lives, but we can control how we respond to it.

P.S. Thank you to LOLA for supporting Ladies Who Lunch! For 60% off your first order, visit mylola.com and enter LWL when you subscribe.

Our friend Chris Klemens joins us this week to talk about rejection. Being involuntary forced to leave a job or professional relationship can swirl you into a downpour of emotion: embarrassment, depression, worthlessness, self-pity and shame. As someone who recently got fired, Chris gives us insight into how that feeling of failure affected his self-worth. Cat unexpectedly reached the end of a professional relationship, and her confidence took a massive hit. Your identity is deeply embedded with what you do, so how does being rejected affect your relationship to vulnerability in your life?