Jake is having relationship issues and that means that everyone has to hear about it, but especially Jane. Jane crosses a line that will be hard to walk back. Caliborn hits on Jane in the most backward manner and explains his artistic method. Roxy is kidnapped by GCAT and locked up in jail. DD visits a very important prisoner and gets fashion advice. Meanwhile in the past Roxy reads a story about characters stuck in a story who are desperately trying to change their destiny. A little firefly comes in the window and speaks in code and Ashley reveals some secrets to Molly.

John wins a fight. Rose finds a cat. Dave gets his ass kicked. Jade finds her grandpa. Jules loses her mind.

Vriska and Meenah finally meet and end up throwing the party of their afterlife. It's a mess and also kind of the best. The Alpha go through their Sburb game for much longer then the beta kids ever did but much quicker from our perspective. Caliborn investigates his session and finds a computer, a collection of locks, a clown and the asshole who seems to be pulling all the strings.

We finally meet Jade as we enter Act 3! She has a conversation with Rose. John gets beat up by a pair of rather large ogres. PM has a fuckin' DOPE sword.

Vriska shows John and Tavros how tough it is to hunt for treasure in the Furthest Ring and how the giant reality destroying monster following you can be your biggest help. Meenah talks to the last of her pals and we learn about a secret relationship that can only cause problems. Dave works on his raps, Kanaya turns on the dark and Rose makes a move.

THE WAIT IS OVER. After an unplanned hiatus of an unFORGIVEABLE length, LMTYAHS Beta is back! Luke and Ashley explore the final leg of Hivebent, as Karkat discovers and then tortures himself with Trollian's memo system, Terezi schemes to exile Jack Noir, and Aradia rediscovers nihilism as the fate of the trolls reveals itself to be completely set in stone. They overcame a nearly impossible challenge, and were still denied their reward. It's so infuriating! Why if they discovered that 4 kids out in the multiverse were somehow responsible for what happened, they'd be SO mad.

Dave climbs. Rose disconnects. Jade wishes she could tell us more. John prepares for a boss fight. WV ascends.

Meenah meets up with her friends finally, and I can't lie to you they mostly all suck. Mituna and Kankri especially. Porrim is cool though, she's got all those tattoos and stuff. We make it through memories, meet a cult and just generally kinda fuck around. John and Jade watch Con Air and John has a upsetting revelation, Davesprite takes a joke to far and Bec Noir needs a rest but isn't getting one anytime soon.

John forgets about stairs. Rose throws a bathtub. Dave has a Bad Apartment.

Calliope walks around her room as we take in as much as we can for what may be the final time. Her brother tells us about the parts of Homestuck he loves the most: when people die (and sometimes kiss). Dirk becomes the coolest character in the world before doing something very creepy. Or is it AR doing it? Sorry, Lil Hal. As the kids enter their four player session a one player session is set into motion. Meanwhile Meenah walks around, talking about the identity of Lord English, chatting about gillfronds and talking to Dave, who is the best.