Jason and Rebecca have no time for robocalls so they hand the phone over to their trusted assistant, Jon Snow. Yeah, they got it like that. Just kidding. We got Robokiller! Jason tries to convince Rebecca that this technology (including her now beloved air fryer) has come at a price…human sacrifice to aliens. But would aliens really want life forms that make a first kiss into a TV show? They might not find real intelligent life here on Earth. ET phone elsewhere. 

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Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Maybe this is why Jason just put his name on the rover going to Mars? Rebecca is left confused so the conversation switches to something she is well versed in, tips for meeting and mingling with men. Eye contact is key but also creepy. And when you get tired of being yourself, just throw on a wig and give your alter ego a night out.  

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The driving-duo are back at it again. Jason dips into true crime (but just the headlines) after zipping through Puerto Rico. Rebecca vents about new laws that were old laws and the BS of it all. MOVE OVER peeps, the interstate is not for the weak, or the poor, and the internet is NOT for you to post boob shots. #momslife.

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Rebecca discovers something better than whistling while you work. Whistling for some work, all at a push of a button! This app is a mother’s day game changer. Need to save your marriage? There’s an app for that, too! Reminder: Tell your wife you love her. But just how lazy are you? Jason gives Rebecca the test and she passes with flying colors. She doesn’t need coffee to get her going. 

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Bacon, coffee and pancakes, oh my. Jason and Rebecca mix it up by cooking breakfast while they podcast. But let’s be real, Rebecca is the alpha in the kitchen. When two highly functioning people collide, one has to bow out. Peace-out Jason. Breakfast is served! The syrup is sticky and so is the conversation. They go from innocent kids to not so innocent kids. Susie, stop humping that arm chair or else we are going on Wife Swap! 

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Rebecca and Jason go down a list of weird things everyone does. Don’t play coy, Roy! You know you do these things, too. People who never turn their phone on silent are definitely weird, just like that cup of coffee that showed up on Game of Thrones. Winter spiced latte is coming. The convo switches to the similarities between Sex and the City and The Golden Girls but this driving-duo can’t seem to remember SJP’s name! Stay weird people. 

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Sapiosexuals, Porn Blocking and Fake Lashes

What gets you saying oohhhh la la? Maybe fake lashes? A sleep apnea mask? Or that Mensa member? Haha we said member. Everyone has a fetish but not every fetish has a name. Leave it to the intellectuals to come up with a name for being attracted to other intellectuals. Ergo, we present to you Sapiosexuals. Meanwhile Europe is putting the clamp down on underaged online porn viewing. They must really want kids to go play outside. All this and more on this episode of Life in the Slow Lane with Rebecca and Jason. 

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Rebecca gets out from behind the wheel to have a face-to-face with Jason at home. Risking the wrath of the “Beyhive”, she criticizes Beyonce’s Netflix video. But hey, it could be worse. People buy Kanye West’s church merch and other people try to cure themselves with piss. If it’s yellow, let it mellow. Ewwww, gross! Our real hero today is Abigail Disney! Power to the underpaid and overworked! You can be a hero too by never saying a certain 22 things to women. Listen up!

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Rebecca and Jason are back! What does the canister of a Pillsbury Cinnamon Roll and a nose pimple have in common? They both are the work of the devil and a bitch to pop open. We’ll spare you the similarities with the icing. You’re welcome. Rebecca rants about discovering that the stars are now aligned against her Gemini birthright. She’s now pissed about being Taurus according to a new horoscope but that isn’t what’s keeping her from sleeping at night. She checks herself in for a sleep study to see exactly what is keeping her from her ZZZZs. The lights get turned down at 11pm but the anxiety gets turned up. Tune-in to see what happens. 

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Rebecca and Jason decide to take on a dark passenger on their way home. He’s no stranger but he could be considering he’s much younger, doesn’t drink, and is an advocate for paper straws. Our backseat guest, Charles from Utah, chimes in from time to time on important topics like Wazes, mormon gays, and the difference between worthless and priceless. Rebecca is disappointed once again because Jason failed to bring her a gay who does hair or makeup. 

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