Life Mastery Lounge Podcast

Hi Friend!

 One of the things we must do is forget about our past. Our past does not define our current situation nor our future. And I begin with this one because this one creeps up on me like, a lot. I find myself beating myself up because of past mistakes I made with money and I really don't think there's one that I didn't make!

Yes, this is a big one for me and I have to remind myself constantly that I've made the mistakes but I like to think I've learned from them and I will avoid making them all over again.

Next, believe you are destined and deserve success. Approach your money from a place of openness, curiosity and excitement.

Then, change your money story. It's hard to attract wealth and abundance when we are constantly in a state of lack. When we are constantly thinking about how little we have, it's hard to make space for more. Some of the affirmations we've talked about will help with this one. Here are a few more:

Money flows freely to me.

I am worthy of all the wealth I desire.

But feel free to create your own and if you are up for it, share them in the Sparkling Budgets club, if you are a member. If not, go over to Facebook and join the community. We'd love to have you.

Create a vision board. Visualisation, just like positive affirmations, is a very powerful tool when it comes to changing our mindset. Keep this board where you'll see it every day and more than once a day if possible. There's something to the fact that those things exist and you can have them too.

Next, picture yourself, yes, this goes along with visualisation! Ask yourself where you see yourself in 5, 10 or 20 years. Answering this question made me quit my day job and pursue my dreams. Well, this and the fact that we are now in a financial position that I could do that, but I'm not exactly where I should be! You should always start before you are ready! So here I am.

Practice gratitude. Keep a gratitude Journal and make it a daily habit of writing down all the things you are grateful for. This exercise alone will set the tone for your whole life.

Give freely and generously. This is a big one. When we make the conscious decision to give, we feel more confident, secure and fulfilled with our money. I practice this one whenever my scarcity mindset starts creeping up. I give, and I give more and more, I'm never disappointed with how much I get in return.

Knowledge is power, so read, listen and watch everything you can about the area you are most struggling with. What I mean is, learn. Take it upon yourself to learn about what you need to know to make  better, informed decisions, or even to know what the next right step is. Believe me, your confidence will skyrocket!

And that brings me to my next point. Be more Confident! Us women, underestimate what we are worth most of the time. It's no wonder we are the ones that have the hardest time in dealing with an unworthiness mindset. You deserve that money! Remember, money is a tool, a resource to help us achieve our goals. It's within our reach so go for it.

And next, live abundantly. By understanding your money mindset you'll be able to create habits that will help you reach your goals. So remember to set huge goals really big goals. Goals that scare the heck out of you. You got this and I'm proud of you for taking the first step to creating that life! For creating that space for new things, for better things.

Well, I hope I didn't lose you. Here are some steps you can take right now, today, to get you going deeper into creating a healthy money mindset.

One, forget about your past and forgive yourself for any past mistakes you made with money.

Two, start thinking abundantly a scarcity mindset will keep you stuck. Believe in the possibility.

www.thesarafernandes.com

Hi, friend. Tell me, have you been practicing all the techniques we've been talking about to create a healthy money mindset? How's it going? Please let me know if they are really working for you or if you are struggling with one in particular. I'd love to know and to help you if I can, of course. So I want to tell you about something that happened to me over the weekend. If you are a subscriber to my newsletter, you might have heard a little bit about what I'm about to tell you. But here's the whole story. So this story could start like this. I had a dream. No, I'm not even kidding. But just so that you are situated, I've been having an existential crisis. It's my birthday month and I was having a bit of a hard time with it. Well, there are birthdays that are a little more difficult than others. So the story goes something like this. I belong to a business book club and we are reading at the moment. You are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero. And on Saturday night, well, it was already Sunday morning I suppose, I had a dream. I can't remember what I was dreaming about, but I remember holding in my hands a new out of the box tampon. Yeah, you heard that right? It's so random. And honestly, I don't even know how that fit into the dream because I don't. For the life of me, I don't remember the dream I was having. Anyway, I woke up, it was so weird. And I just thought, what was I even dreaming? The only thing I remember from the dream was this random thing that I was holding a tampon in my hand. And because it was Sunday I got up, but it was still early, I put my coffee maker on and I decided to stay in bed a little bit longer and read. Right? And I kid you not. Five minutes after I was reading, I get to a part in the book in chapter nine where she says, the author, she talks about going to visit her cousin in Italy and she says that she stashed her ash inside a box of tampons. I mean… I thought, what? Honestly, when I read it, I had to read it again and again. I said, is this really happening? It was. Anyway, I thought that was really strange. And it's true that I've been having a little bit of a hard time keeping my spirits up. I've been thinking a lot if I should even do what I'm doing, if I should have left my day job. It's been a bit tough, tougher than I anticipated. Anyway, Well, somehow, don't ask me why, I thought, is this some kind of sign? Am I supposed to know what this means? I didn't know what that meant. I have no idea still what that meant. I just want to take it as a sign.

So, I got up. I stopped reading right there. I got up, I went to the kitchen, had breakfast. I went for a long walk with my husband. And it was cold, but really nice. And I even told him the story and he didn't understand anything. Anyway, long story short, I come home, we take care of lunch, start putting that together, and I go on YouTube because I'm a big YouTube consumer.

Find me here:

moneywhineandcheese.com

@money_whine_and_cheese

During the month of February, I’ll be going a little deeper into our financial mindset.

In the last episode I talked about the overwhelm we feel around our finances and I remembered that a lot of the overwhelmed I felt when I was first dealing with my massive debt and the money, cam from my mindset around money.

So because it’s my birthday month, February, I decided that I could use a reset myself around the mindset. So I’ll be talking about it and giving you little tips on how to start to change your mindset around money and how that will significantly reduce the overwhelm you feel when even just “thinking“ about your finances.

The first thing we’re going to focus on is a “broke“ mindset and how to flip it to a positive mindset.

It’s not hard, but just like when you start doing sports or create a new routine, it takes time for it to settle in and become “part“ of your life.

So, what is a broke mindset?

It’s living in fear of money. It’s thinking you’ll never have enough. It’s believing you’ll never be able to reach your financial goals.

You know I’m big on quotes and I can find one for just about any topic and I believe Henry Ford said it best when he said “whether you think you can or you can’t you’re right“.

So, why do some people have a “broke“ mindset and others don’t? What is different? Now, here is my “broke“ mindset thinking “I’m so unlucky that even my mindset is not the right one!“. I bet you were thinking the same thing!

Let me assure you that there are a lot of factors that contribute to this. One of them is our upbringing, in the last podcast episode I talked to you about the Money brackets we grew up in, and that certainly is one of the factors. Another one is how we perceived the situation. Remember, I talked about two siblings, brought up the same way in the same household and having completely different ideas about what was going on!

Then there are all the exterieur factors that also have and still contribute to how you think and deal with, well, life in general and because we are talking about personal finances, they are just that personal!

If you have an inferiority complex that does not help in creating an abundant and positive mindset.

As you see, everything around us makes us the way we are in life and in money. And remember, your mind is trying to keep you safe. It does not want you to get hurt so it protects you by sending you signals of danger from everywhere.

Now, how can we change that?

Before we get to that, I want you to promise yourself you’ll give this a go! And I don’t just want you to say you’ll give it a go. I want you to promise yourself and I want you to promise me, that you are not going to break the promise you made to yourself!

We are very good at keeping our promises to others but, well, I’m like this so I bet there’s a couple of you out there that are the same, when it comes to keeping the promises I made to myself… I just don’t. If something has got to give, it’s always what I promised to myself first! Now is the time I want us all to stop doing that.

Because when we break the promises we make to ourselves, we are saying that we are not important and that my friend, is just not the case.

www.moneywhineandcheese.com

Overwhelm can be a response to a positive situation. I heard this from Susie Moore and I will probably butcher her words, but it went something like this! We sometimes say: “I’m overwhelmed with all this work!“ and that’s a good thing, especially when we think we have work!

So, when we talk about our finances, why do we feel overwhelmed? Because you don’t have enough money to cover your basic living expenses? Or are you overwhelmed because no matter how much money you make there never seems to be enough to keep you going until the next pay-check? Or you do get to the  next pay-check but you never have enough to save? What is it that’s really stressing you?

And, is that a fact? Is it the truth or do you just think that that’s what’s going on? There’s a quote from Mark Twain that goes like this; “I’ve lived some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened!“. Let me say that again!

The four %money Brackets: let's talk about the Stressed bracket: You grew up in a stressed environment if you felt anxious and tension around money. It was never openly discussed but you “felt” it was a source of stress in your house. You still feel uncomfortable whenever money is mentioned around you!

The Unstable bracket: you grew up in an unstable environment if money was talked, well mostly shouted about openly and freely in front of you. If there was money you lived like rich people and the next week you barely had any food on the table. This bracket is full of negative emotions towards money even to this day you feel very emotional when money is concerned.

The Unaware bracket: you grew up in an unaware environment if you never even realised that money existed. No one talked about it, when you asked for something you usually got it. You either believed there was lots of money when you were growing up or you didn’t even think about it. Someone always took care of things for you and even today you feel that someone will come through if you need. That’s just how things have always been.

The Secure bracket: you grew up in a secure environment if money was discussed when you were growing up, openly by your parents, you might not have had everything you wanted but it was explained to you why and how you had to make choices. There might or might not have been a lot of money but the adults in your life were on the same page about it and there was no stress around money.

Now, depending on which bracket you fall, you have a few challenges to overcome. If you grew up in the stressed bracket you might have a scarcity mindset and always feel very emotional and stressed when people bring up money around you. You probably have been facing some challenges in your life. Not because you have debt or don’t earn enough money, but because you don’t seem to be able to let go of that feeling that pressed upon you growing up. Or if you grew up in the secure bracket you might be facing challenges because it seemed so easy when you were growing up but actually you don’t know very well how to manage your money now that you are a grown up! You found out that it’s not easy and just because it was modelled to you it doesn’t come naturally and you still have to work hard to stick to your money goals. If you grew up in the unaware bracket you probably feel you’ve been cheated, because no one taught you how to manage your money. Now that you are an adult no one is coming to take care of the money issues you face. And if you grew up in the unstable bracket, you might feel you can’t get out of the rat race! You spend all you have when you have it and then go without until the next pay day. You feel this is how it’s meant to be because that’s what was taught, or rather that’s what you grew up seeing. And it’s true that more is caught than taught!

www.moneywhineandcheese.com

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer

What is the best time to start paying attention to your financial situation? 

Correct, it is yesterday, but since we didn't start yesterday, today is the next best answer!

Join me in my Masterclass “Overwhelm to Crushing your Personal Finances“ Live on my FB group, on the 24th, 25th & 26th January 2022 at 10am EST.

This episode is really to remind you that your life could be so much better, so much pleasant with a lot less stress if your Finances were correctly handled! And by correct, I don't mean by my standards, but just by the basic standards. If we do the bare minimum, we know where we stand financially and we can make better informed decisions! 

I hope this episode inspires you to take that step! And that it inspires you to take action and join that Masterclass because, even if you are not yet a t a place where you feel you can take action, at least you are educating yourself so that when you are ready to tackle those numbers, you know what to do!

I hope to see you Monday! 

you can sign up HERE if you are not a member of The Sparkling Budgeteer's Club, if ou are, all you need is to show up in the Group on Monday!

I'm having a hard time setting goals for the year! I love plans and budgets and lists and yet, when it comes to setting goals... something just paralyses me! While I was thinking about the goals I wanted to set, I started to think about the way I talk to you and how I am afraid to hurt your feelings and how much I want you to like me, because let's face it, I want everyone to like me! And even thought I know that everything I say to you is to help you, it's said with love, I still shy away from the hard truths because I don't want to discourage you any more than you already are by creating a budget and how overwhelming it can be... But there are things that most be said and I say them in this episode! 

Have a listen, tell me what you think about it... just remember, it's said with lots and lots of love!

On other news: I'm having a 3 day Webinar, From Overwhelm to Crushing Your Finances, it's completely free and I would love to see you there. I will be giving you lots of information, tips and tricks on how to create, maintain or curate your Spending Plan, Budget or List! Whatever you feel comfortable calling it!

Please go sign-up for the 3 Day Webinar here: https://mailchi.mp/b27b106153ae/3daywebinar

moneywhineandcheese.com

@money_whine_and_cheese

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer

In this episode I want to remind you of a few things you can do, or let go off, to have a more joyful or peaceful time during the Holiday Season.

But most of all I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. 

I want to thank you for being here, supporting me and I want you to know I'm here to support you. There are a lot of free resources you can grab, articles on the blog you can read that can help you navigate through this time, if it is challenging for you in any way. 

This episodes wraps up the year on the podcast but you can go back and listen to a few that are very relevant to this time year. 

I'll be back on the first week of January 2022 and I hope to see you back here as well!

Take care

Merry Christmas!

You can find all things Money, Whine and Cheese 

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer

It’s the most Wonderful time of the Year!

You all know I love all things Christmas! The weather, yes I’ve spent many Christmas in the southern hemisphere and yes, I loved it, but there’s just something about snow, a white bearded old man in a red suit and hot chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows…

If I’m being honest, I’ve been nesting from right about after Thanksgiving. I’ve been getting into the Christmas Mood. My choice of music (all Christmas carols and songs from back in the day to today, of course!) seems to annoy everyone in my house, whenever they come out of their rooms they have white things sticking out of their ears!!!! and if I need to get their attention I have to scream and shout and ultimately revert to poking them so they know I need their attention! (they are all also avoiding eye contact with me because “apparently” I’m smiling and singing, at the same time, at the top of my lungs!)

I get that this isn’t everybody’s favourite Season (even if I don’t understand why ;). I know it can be very stressful and people are going through tough times, be it because of the situation we are living worldwide, be it because of things going on with their family. Of course I have all those people that I love dearly in my mind and heart but twinkly lights have a way of getting me to hope for the best. I do like silver linings and am constantly looking out for them.

But today I want to tell you about something that happened to me this week! I didn’t know if I should but, well, I’m only human and I really want you to know that the struggle is real no matter where you find yourself in life! You know I love budgets and I don’t always stick to them but I do a “happy-dance” whenever I do! You also know all my conundrums with cards (mostly credit cards!). Well, this year, for the first time in forever, we, my husband and I, decided that we would leave a lot of “extra” money in our “everyday” bank account because we are going away right after Christmas and because of holidays, it would be easier to have the money already there.

This week, I was out shopping for the last Christmas gifts I needed to get and I went into a store that I’ve been “eyeing” for years but had never gone in because it looks very nice and expensive.

For info on the sale going on for 90 Day Money Reset (or any other reason!) contact [email protected]

For everything else go to

www.moneywhineandcheese.com

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer

I’ve been talking to you a lot about what not to do financially speaking, when you are trying to get out of debt or change your money habits.

One of the things most people, myself included, ignore is that our personal behaviours are a major factor to either help or sabotaje our success!

What I mean is, if we keep spending like we always have, if we keep earning like we always have, nothing is going to change. But if you are really trying to change your behaviour around money. If you are trying to spend less and be more intentional with your money but you keep doing the same thing, nothing is going to change.

When we want to change in one area of our lives, chances are we need to change in other areas as well! Let me give you an example, if you want to spend less, maybe it means you need to stop going out to dinner every friday night with your squad. So, if you continue to go out every Friday night it’s going to be very difficult for you to keep to your plan. I’m not saying that you should give up going out with your girlfriends ever! I am saying that you could cut dining out to 2 times a month and maybe join them for coffee or dessert every other friday!

It’s not ideal, I get it, you get Fomo just thinking about it! I’ve been there. But ultimately what’s more important? You stressing out every single month because you can hardly make ends meet,  holding your breath every time you hand out your card to see if it goes through. Or telling your friends what you need to do right now to create a more balanced life for yourself and eventually getting back to “every-friday-night” dinner with them! I get it that they may not need to cut back on their expenses but chances are you are not the only one struggling financially. But if you are, chances are they will understand and maybe cut back to dining two times a month in solidarity!

But what I’m more interested in is, are you willing to go through with it if they keep on going out every friday night? I’m always going on about how money is not the most important thing in getting out of debt or creating a spending plan...

www.moneywhineandcheese.com

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer 

Happy Thanksgiving my American friends!

I hope you are having the most wonderful holiday with family and friends.

I know most of you are ready for tomorrow! I know I am! I shouldn’t really be saying this but… I love shopping and black friday is rapidly becoming one of my favorite days, especially because since 2019 online shopping has become one of my favorites!

I hope you have planned for it and you have your budget all set and your debit card ready! I know I do!

But today I’d also like to talk to you about… family!

It seems appropriate since most of us are spending the day with family and that’s not always easy! If anything it can be very stressful and I kind of want to tie the 2 last episodes. If you haven’t had a chance to listen to them go ahead and do that so that this one makes more sense!

I talked about Mental Health and Overspending on gift giving to be liked!

It’s a proven fact that the Holidays are a tough season for a lot of us! It’s not a coincidence that financial stress, gift giving and family are all in the top reasons why most people struggle during the Holidays!

So, as we officially enter the Season, I thought it would be a good time to once again, give you permission, if you feel you need it, to spend only what you have, give only when you feel called to do so and set boundaries with family and friends so that the Holidays run a little smoother this time around! More than 60% of people who are dealing with some kind of mental issue say they struggle more around Christmas.

At my house, overspending was the norm, gift giving took proportions never seen before because I wanted people to like me! I got a handle on these two. I am, however, actively working on that boundaries one!

I’m a people pleaser, well you should know that already, I mean I used to buy extravagant gifts for friends so that they would be impressed and like me better! I also have a problem saying no taking a stand, in my own house!

I recently took up tapping, if you don’t know what it is my friend Shannon, over at finally effing happy, you can find her on instagram, she’s amazing, introduced me to it and it’s been life changing, not only with dealing with past issues but also dealing with my anxiety and creating boundaries in my everyday life. Yes, because I have no boundaries whatsoever! And during the Holidays, or family gatherings it’s worse. I either let myself get walked all over or I say something the wrong way and ruin everyone's day so, most often than not I choose to keep quiet and just let people do whatever they want even if I spent months preparing for this and was excited to receive everyone in my house to celebrate Christmas.

I keep telling myself that it’s the Season of giving so I will let it go. But we all know that’s not true. I do it because it’s the way I have to not cause conflict. I run away from confrontation like I run from the plague! People pleaser here! And the truth is, it does nothing for my anxiety or my mental well being! So...

www.moneywhineandcheese.com

https://linktr.ee/Thesparklingbudgeteer