Love Hate Debate

Ep 4 Season 2 Girls, girls, girrrrrrrls Unless you have been under a rock this week, we all know that this ep is dedicated to Alex NATION (if we have to say her surname it is going in caps!!) and Brooke get their kiss on creating love hexagons all over paradise. Other notables in the kissing stakes were Jules and Alisha 🥰 and Brittney and newcomer Ivan Drago. 🥰 And we couldn’t be happier unless Alisha breaks Jules’ heart. We are watching you Alisha! Jimmys exit outfit ; a white suit gave Vee and Shari flashbacks to their childhood watching Tattoo on Fantasy Island. Ze plane! Ze Plane! Thanks for the laugh Jimmy. And BTW Alex NATION has already lost your phone number and will definitely NOT be calling when she leaves Paradise. Cool? Cool.

Ep 3 Season 2

We start at the end of last nights rose ceremony with Britt doing the happy dance with her rose including poses that we can categorically say no one has ever done before and perhaps no one should do again?

Cat does a runner out of paradise while Vanessa Sunshine stands and accepts her fate. Pretty much says everything you need to know about the difference between these two women. New entrants Davey and Jules (sans curly moustache and zany backing track) join the castaways.

A quad date has Brooke & Nathan and Alex N & Bill discovering new options.

Fash-un lowlights were Cass and her almost there, leave nothing to the imagination en-sem along with Paddys head band. We suspect it was somehow cutting oxygen supply to his brain explaining quite a lot.

Vee is off to find Paddy a professional anger management course while Shari is preparing to issue passports to the newly discovered land of Delusionville for Cat, James, Rachel & Paddy ☀️

Ep 2 Season 2 Bachelor in Paradise 2019 More entrances from Vanessa Sunshine & Alex Nation two women who we can only call by both names. Fashion low lights included Cats scrunchie & Shannon’s rose ceremony ensemble. I said love, I said pet...no. We finally got to understand the drama behind Richie and Alex’s split. It’s sad and personal and we feel bad for prying. Sorry guys, as you were. Vee learns that “spilling the tea” has more to do with gossip than Bushells black with one sugar while Shari is stoked for Brittney that her conga line finally became a reality. Cha cha, cha cha, CHA CHA!

Ep 1 Season 2 BULA!! Tonight we meet and greet with the “leftovers” from past Batchelor series including those of Sophie Monk, Ali, Ritchie and at least 5 women who dodged the Honey Badger bullet. Fashion lowlights include Shannon’s hat, Brooke’s earrings and Paddy and Bill doing a “who wore it better” with their choice of board shorts. How embarrassment! 😳 Vee’s gaydar may need to be sent for a service as it is being a bit sensitive while Shari has got one eye on Alex B from Detroit who does a mean lap dance. Let the party begin!

Ep 41 The Final Couch-down There is literally (we mean figuratively) 100 people in this room and no, Billy you will not get to speak tonight. Nobody cares. Not even the experts. For our sins we will be punished with more wailing, sighing and handwringing by Magic Mike and Heidi. You two are toxic together and Mike and his views on females should have been left in the 1900s. That is all we are going to say about that! While Michael & Martha, Jessika with a K & Dan and a weird late coupling of new BFFs Lizzy & Innes ride off into the sunset together, Vee and Shari are preparing their ensembles for Cam & Jules wedding. Surely their invitations are in the mail?? Until next season.....it’s been a ride.

Ep 40 Dinner Party revenge - a - palooza Smug marrieds have become smug engageds who will then become the smug marrieds for realz at some stage in the future and.......we don’t care. The swinging singles have returned either because they are contractually obligated or for The Gram. This does not include Ning who is looking for hair related cues from Mark that will definitely mean he still has the feels. Everyone seemed to be having a good time and for Queen Cyrell this JUST WILL NOT DO! So she slowly puts on her crown and sceptre and screams at the top of her lungs “OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!!” There was yelling, finger pointing, Michaels balls get tossed around and finally wine thrown on heads and dresses. #tears ensue from Vee screaming “noooooo not the Prada!!!” While Shari is apologises to her viewing buddies for having to watch the most popular show on Australian TV. 😂. Your dirty little secret is safe with us. 😉

Ep 39 : this is fucking torture. Srsly!!!!!! Which dickhead had the weapons-grade stupid idea to dedicate a whole hour and a half episode to possibly the most toxic, troublesome & torturous relationships in MAFS history????? While Vee is quietly grinning herself that she had to work and missed the episode #sorrynotsorry 🤓 😂 Shari has an existential crisis with the revelation that it may actually be us, the viewing public, that are in a toxic relationship with the show. We need to meditate on this! Like compliant hostages with Stockholm syndrome who have grown to love their captors we will be right back here on Sunday & Monday for the Reunion. Hopefully much less punishing and much more entertaining!!! Bring it.

Ep 38 Blindsides & Bullshitters Mark & Ning and Martha & Michael step back up to the plate tonight for the recommitment ceremony and the girls are SHOOK! No spoilers here....just press play 😉 Shari and Vee are even more shook when it became clear the most punishing couple of this whole season Magic Mike & Heidi are about to have a whole episode dedicated to their will they/won’t they recommitment ceremony tomorrow night. And literally NOBODY CARES! Not. Even. One. 🙄🙄🙄🤣

Ep 37 - Will they or will they?!?!......and of course they do and we know they do because....the internet. Anyhoo realising we were about to be punished for our sins and made to sit through an hour and a half of repeats and non events Shari and Vee have done their best to put lipstick on this pig of an episode and have pulled out some tasty morsels for your listening pleasure. Enjoy 😘

Ep 36 : The last Dinner Party 🥂Wednesday nights will never be the same as we can no longer look forward to a table full of drama. But shhhhh....it’s about to start. We are all relieved that Farmer Wants a Wife is watching this one from home with Baaaaabara as this week he may well have come in bare feet to continue his protests. He is now free to spend tonight listening to country music and enjoy a beer on the balcony - ahhhh the sweet sound of freedom. Back at the dinner party it felt more like a war time period drama after most of the characters have been killed off with the longest table and only 5 couples. Everyone is keen to “do a Trish” and check the intimacy of Mark and Ning’s relationship and NO...stop however they reveal have not “done the deed”. Vee announces a theory that Trish has a sex sixth sense (try saying that three times fast) 🤣 and Shari is shook with the fall out from the Boxes of Truth. 🙃 Bless you dinner party - you have served us well. Until we meet again next season.....